No, despite what Hoonigan’s gentle giant wants you to think OshKosh Truck and OshKosh B’gosh are not the same company. They were both founded in that same-named town in Wisconsin, but one focuses on children’s clothes (and is now owned by Carter’s) while the other focuses on industrial equipment and is now called OshKosh Corporation. Regardless, the OskKosh heavy equipment maker is what we’re talking about today because Hoonigan got its hands on an eight-wheeled Heavy Expanded Mobility Tactical Truck and set about drag racing it… and that’s just awesome.

The HEMTT is still in use today and its main job is transporting heavy loads. These are set up for supply and re-supply situations with a pair of operators sitting in the nose. You have a locking diff on each of the axles, a massive turbodiesel engine sitting behind the cab, and a ten-ton payload capacity. If you need to drive through water, the HEMTT can handle up to four feet of it and it’s capable of climbing up grades greater than 30 degrees.

It is not quicker down an airport runway, however, compared to a brand-new Ford F-450 that is towing a trailer with three vehicles on it. The Blue Oval takes the edge there. It doesn’t matter though because this is an entertaining, albeit slow, episode of Hoonigan’s This vs That.