Sleeper alert: a Malibu with a grand heart

Kamil Kaluski
30

Comments

Let’s start with a question – are the days of sleeper cars over now?

Many of today’s basic cross-over-wanna-be-minivan things come with around 300-horsepower and very many of them are capable of killing the quarter miles in less than 15 seconds. Then there are the high-performance those not-so-basic cross-over-wanna-be-minivan things that would just spank proper sports from not long ago. Just the fact that a 707-horsepower Jeep exists should be mind-blowing.

Similarly, no longer do we have poverty spec cars with crack windows, hub-caps, and Iron Dukes. There are few examples here and there but none of them are really something that anyone would want to modify to hunt the unsuspecting Durango SRT. Or maybe I’m wrong? I don’t really know where I was going with this.

Regardless, here is a solid sleeper from the bygone era of the not-so-fabulous 1980s. It’s a 1980 Malibu with a Buick Grand National engine. And just look at that swap… everything seems to be so easy to do compared to modern cars. Literally, just swap the effer over. Radiator clearance issue? LOL, how about no.

From the Facebook Marketplace ad:

9000 original miles. Original 6 cyl swapped out for 1987 Grand National 6 cylinder turbo drivetrain and rearend. Forged pistons. Roller Comp Cam. Harland Sharp roller rockers. Aftermarket crank and Rods. Ported heads. 61mm Turbo. Alky injection. Injectors. Built tanny. PTC convertor. Metco control arms rear. Scanmaster. Excellent condition. Ultimate sleeper. Search “grandmas cooking 1980 malibu”. Featured in Hot Rod Magazine. No lowballers. Serious inquiries only. Serious inquiries only. Serious inquiries only. $19,900

Just look at this thing. Yes, we now think it’s glorious, as most things of certain age are, but I’m sure there are many baby-boomers who would tell what crapboxes these were to commute in daily. The AAA sticker, everyone had one at that time so that tow truck drivers knew to stop and help you when the transmission finally gave up, is a nice touch. The Reagan & Bush sticker was either applied right when this thing was bought or was (more likely) added later as a period-correct thing. Reagan was elected in November of 1980 and this is a 1980 model year vehicle.

Gauges in a glove box seems to be the only interior modification. Even the floor-mats are Sears-spec period correct. Have fun sliding around on those flat bench seats as your ass gets hauled down the drag strip in 13-ish seconds. Crank windows, because base Malibu.

This is a great sleeper. It’s probably quiet at idle too, with a hint of whistle. Looks great with those hubcaps but decent tires are a must on this thing to actually get going. The asking price seems high but it is a 9000-mile 1980 Malibu in an unbelievable shape with a bonus of a built Grand National motor. It will sell.

About

Kamil Kaluski

Kamil Kaluski

East Coast Editor. Races crappy cars and has an unhealthy obsession with Eastern Bloc cars. Current fleet: 4Runner, Integra, Regal, Lada

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30 responses to “Sleeper alert: a Malibu with a grand heart”

  1. njhoon Avatar
    njhoon

    19K seems a little steep, I’d like it with an LS turbo. But personal preferences aside its a cool car.

    Reply
  2. njhoon Avatar
    njhoon

    19K seems a little steep, I’d like it with an LS turbo. But personal preferences aside its a cool car.

    Reply
    1. Zentropy Avatar
      Zentropy

      I agree… “it’ll sell”, but it won’t sell for $19K. I’d be shocked if they get $12k out of it. The value of the “9000 original miles” was pretty much wiped out when the original engine was pulled.

      Reply
      1. Lokki Avatar
        Lokki

        The problem for me is that the 1980 Malibu isn’t a cool car and at $19K there are a lot of other cooler cars I could choose for a toy. Say, a nice 60’s Mustang. I agree with Zentropy that the low mileage here means nothing once the engine has been swapped. As for being a Sleeper…. well, it’s only a sleeper to those who remember what pigs 1980 Malibus were. For the average young Joe (Okay, Jacob) well, it’s sort of expected that “old cars” will have a big V8 and be fast. The distinction that this one has a V6 with a turbo instead of an 8 and the idea that is somehow a novelty will be lost on them.

        Finally to Kamil’s point – I agree that the days of building a sleeper are over. The cheap Chinese turbocharger has killed them. No one is going to bet against your 306 HP Civic or 275 HP Veloster (both are factory stock figures) in a street race… or any Civic without a good look under the hood first. Oh, and then there’s nitrous.

        I am willing to argue that horsepower as a selling point is finished. The 700 HP Chryslers are very much fin de siècle. Cool but where do you go from there and what happens when you get there? 1,000 HP? Sure but so what? Electric cars with 100 percent torque from 1 rpm on will still beat them in a drag race.

        The day of the ICE is over; it just hasn’t died yet. Whenever I see a Hellcat, I cannot get the image of the 1906 Stanley Steamer setting a world speed record of 127 mph on Daytona beach out of my mind. An impressive accomplishment but it didn’t save steam….

        http://www.newenglandhistoricalsociety.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/04/fred-marriott-stanley-steamer-racing.jpg

        Reply
      2. wunno sev Avatar
        wunno sev

        the 9000 miles thing still seems relevant to me because those cars weren’t looking good much past 9000 miles. anything with many more miles is probably rusty with ruined paint. harder to fix than swapping in a GN motor.

        Reply
      3. wunno sev Avatar
        wunno sev

        the 9000 miles thing still seems relevant to me because those cars weren’t looking good much past 9000 miles. anything with many more miles is probably rusty with ruined paint. harder to fix than swapping in a GN motor.

        Reply
      4. wunno sev Avatar
        wunno sev

        the 9000 miles thing still seems relevant to me because those cars weren’t looking good much past 9000 miles. anything with many more miles is probably rusty with ruined paint. harder to fix than swapping in a GN motor.

        Reply
  3. Victor~~ Avatar
    Victor~~

    Troublesome old motor but looks like a fun afternoon Nice bumper sticker .

    Reply
  4. Vairship Avatar
    Vairship

    The reason they put the gauges in the glove box is that those glove box lids never latched properly anyway…

    Reply
  5. njhoon Avatar
    njhoon

    19K seems a little steep, I’d like it with an LS turbo. But personal preferences aside its a cool car.

    Reply
    1. Zentropy Avatar
      Zentropy

      I agree… “it’ll sell”, but it won’t sell for $19K. I’d be shocked if they get $12k out of it. The value of the “9000 original miles” was pretty much wiped out when the original engine was pulled.

      Reply
      1. Lokki Avatar
        Lokki

        The problem for me is that the 1980 Malibu isn’t a cool car and at $19K there are a lot of other cooler cars I could choose for a toy. Say, a nice 60’s Mustang. I agree with Zentropy that the low mileage here means nothing once the engine has been swapped. As for being a Sleeper…. well, it’s only a sleeper to those who remember what pigs 1980 Malibus were. For the average young Joe (Okay, Jacob) well, it’s sort of expected that “old cars” will have a big V8 and be fast. The distinction that this one has a V6 with a turbo instead of an 8 and the idea that is somehow a novelty will be lost on them.

        Finally to Kamil’s point – I agree that the days of building a sleeper are over. The cheap Chinese turbocharger has killed them. No one is going to bet against your 306 HP Civic or 275 HP Veloster (both are factory stock figures) in a street race… or any Civic without a good look under the hood first. Oh, and then there’s nitrous.

        I am willing to argue that horsepower as a selling point is finished. The 700 HP Chryslers are very much fin de siècle. Cool but where do you go from there and what happens when you get there? 1,000 HP? Sure but so what? Electric cars with 100 percent torque from 1 rpm on will still beat them in a drag race.

        The day of the ICE is over; it just hasn’t died yet. Whenever I see a Hellcat, I cannot get the image of the 1906 Stanley Steamer setting a world speed record of 127 mph on Daytona beach out of my mind. An impressive accomplishment but it didn’t save steam….

        http://www.newenglandhistoricalsociety.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/04/fred-marriott-stanley-steamer-racing.jpg

        Reply
      2. Lokki Avatar
        Lokki

        The problem for me is that the 1980 Malibu isn’t a cool car and at $19K there are a lot of other cooler cars I could choose for a toy. Say, a nice 60’s Mustang. I agree with Zentropy that the low mileage here means nothing once the engine has been swapped. As for being a Sleeper…. well, it’s only a sleeper to those who remember what pigs 1980 Malibus were. For the average young Joe (Okay, Jacob) well, it’s sort of expected that “old cars” will have a big V8 and be fast. The distinction that this one has a V6 with a turbo instead of an 8 and the idea that is somehow a novelty will be lost on them.

        Finally to Kamil’s point – I agree that the days of building a sleeper are over. The cheap Chinese turbocharger has killed them. No one is going to bet against your 306 HP Civic or 275 HP Veloster (both are factory stock figures) in a street race… or any Civic without a good look under the hood first. Oh, and then there’s nitrous.

        I am willing to argue that horsepower as a selling point is finished. The 700 HP Chryslers are very much fin de siècle. Cool but where do you go from there and what happens when you get there? 1,000 HP? Sure but so what? Electric cars with 100 percent torque from 1 rpm on will still beat them in a drag race.

        The day of the ICE is over; it just hasn’t died yet. Whenever I see a Hellcat, I cannot get the image of the 1906 Stanley Steamer setting a world speed record of 127 mph on Daytona beach out of my mind. An impressive accomplishment but it didn’t save steam….

        http://www.newenglandhistoricalsociety.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/04/fred-marriott-stanley-steamer-racing.jpg

        Reply
    2. Zentropy Avatar
      Zentropy

      I agree… “it’ll sell”, but it won’t sell for $19K. I’d be shocked if they get $12k out of it. The value of the “9000 original miles” was pretty much wiped out when the original engine was pulled.

      Reply
  6. Batshitbox Avatar
    Batshitbox

    Well, why not balance out that too-early for 1980 Reagan & Bush sticker (I mean, unless you bought the car in October when the new models hit the showrooms) with a too-late for 1980 anti-Carter sticker?

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/8d38fec52af5f98c58e4908a28540c70a0082ad86bf6762d27dc7db7af6e44b9.jpg

    Reply
    1. smalleyxb122 Avatar
      smalleyxb122

      The ’80 model would have come out in the fall of ’79. The election would have been in the fall of ’80. There is potentially a full year of campaigning between this car’s delivery and the election.

      I believe that the sticker was added to this car much later to “complete the look”, but it is chronologically feasible that it was affixed during the original Reagan campaign.

      Reply
      1. 0A5599 Avatar
        0A5599

        Agreed, although the timeline is a little tighter than that. The Presidential nominee selects and names the VP nominee at the party’s national convention, which takes place in the summer of the election. So, yes, the car existed during the Reagan campaign, but Bush wasn’t his running mate until July 1980. Of course, assuming that’s a 1980 sticker, pretty much the entire production would have been deployed between July and November.

        Reply
  7. Zentropy Avatar
    Zentropy

    So this thing makes 600hp at the wheels, which appear to be shod with stock-ish looking tires of maybe 215-mm width? I love sleepers, but this seems like overkill under the hood, with everything else ignored. I hope it has the suspension and brakes to back up all of that power.

    Reply
  8. outback_ute Avatar
    outback_ute

    A sleeper today would have to be a turbo AWD Camry. I’m sure you could make 800hp if it only had to live a quarter mile at a time.

    Reply
    1. Vairship Avatar
      Vairship

      Nah, that would blow the welds on the intake manifold.

      Reply
    2. Vairship Avatar
      Vairship

      Nah, that would blow the welds on the intake manifold.

      Reply
      1. outback_ute Avatar
        outback_ute

        That makes the floor fall off too doesn’t it?

        Reply
    3. Lokki Avatar
      Lokki

      Actually, a sleeper today would be an Austin Mini with the drivetrain of an AWD Toyota Celica All-Trac:

      Also known as Project Binky:

      Reply
      1. Zentropy Avatar
        Zentropy

        If Nik and Richard ever finish the damned thing…

        Reply
  9. Vairship Avatar
    Vairship

    The reason they put the gauges in the glove box is that those glove box lids never latched properly anyway…

    Reply
    1. Scoutdude Avatar
      Scoutdude

      Ha ha, sad but true.

      Reply
    2. Scoutdude Avatar
      Scoutdude

      Ha ha, sad but true.

      Reply
    3. Scoutdude Avatar
      Scoutdude

      Ha ha, sad but true.

      Reply
    4. Scoutdude Avatar
      Scoutdude

      Ha ha, sad but true.

      Reply
  10. SlowJoeCrow Avatar
    SlowJoeCrow

    I would expect the engine swap to have been easy because the Malibu and Grand National are actually the same platform so all the hard points match up regardless of exterior dimensions.

    In an era of Camry’s faster than Fox body Mustangs almost any sedan or minivan with the higher power engine is something of a sleeper so there is less space but I think there is still the opportunity to create something unexpectedly fast out out something that is supposed to be slow. A VW Vanagon with diesel badging, and a Subaru WRX drivetrain swap is one example. V8 swapped Volvo 240s and 740s are another example.

    Reply
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