Now YOU Can Be the Fastest AND Laziest Hoon On the Block!

Hell Yeah, It's Fast!
Hell Yeah, It's Fast!

Have you ever had things to do in a day, but just couldn’t bring yourself to drag your butt out of your ultra-comfy La-Z-Boy recliner? Well, haven’t we all? Why, some of us are facing that dilemma right now. If it weren’t for the fact that the coffee maker is all the way over there, I probably wouldn’t move at all!
UPDATED: We’ve found it on eBay!

Quite the La-Z-Boy! Uh... we mean the chair, not the cop.
Quite the La-Z-Boy! Uh… we mean the chair, not the cop.

Well, as you may have heard last week, Dennis Anderson of Proctor, Minnesota thought he had solved this timeless quandry; shortly thereafter, however, he was pulled over for DUI… while driving his gasoline-engined La-Z-Boy recliner. He pleaded guilty to the charge, and the police impounded the lawn mower go-kart vehicle chair. While I’m certainly puzzled over this, as in many areas a motorized wheelchair is not considered a “vehicle”, but a mobility aid, so the most you can be charged with for driving one while under the influence is a standard Punk In Drublic misdemeanor ticket. Even if you’ve managed to use it to get a good high-speed run down a hill, up a ramp, and over a public swimming pool.
Or… uh… so I hear. But I digress.
At any rate, the chair is now going up for sale. Podunk Proctor police have decided that they can’t determine an appropriate use for the chair for official police business, so it’s going to be sold on eBay.
We think someone needs to buy it, and give it back to Mr. Anderson so that this horrible travesty of justice may be repeated remedied.
Thanks to the Legendary Jo Schmo for the tip!
Source: [Wired Autopia, The Smoking Gun]
UPDATED: Jo Schmo managed to locate the actual eBay listing! Unfortunately, its already out of LeMons price territory, unless you could sell off some of the parts, like, say, the NOS bottle on the back. Quick, someone buy it, and find out what its ‘Ring time is.

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  1. Jo Schmo Avatar
    Jo Schmo

    As long as we slap on safety equipment is there any reason this couldn’t run in LeMons?

  2. BigRed Avatar
    BigRed

    No, SIR, YOU assume the position! (seated, of course)

  3. Jeff Glucker Avatar
    Jeff Glucker

    um… we are having some commenting errors, please bear with us!

    1. Charles_Barrett Avatar

      Please stay on the line for the next available representative… Your continued patronage is important to us….
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      Hi…! My name is Naughty Nancy… What are you wearing…?

  4. Smells_Homeless Avatar

    I am already the fastest and laziest hoon on the block and I don't need a fancy chair to prove it.

  5. MarywithanM Avatar

    The questions and answers are a nice added value. I’m assuming that someone here asked about towing the ottoman as well as about the NOS bottle.
    Sorry… forgot to say great post – can’t wait to read your next one!

  6. Social comments and analytics for this post…
    This post was mentioned on Twitter by Hooniverse: From the Hooniverse:: Now YOU Can Be the Fastest AND Laziest Hoon On the Block! http://bit.ly/3GJA3Z

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