Name That Part – Microsoft Edition

Personally, I think engineerd is the PC guy from the commercials. (Image source: Gadgetspace.com)
Personally, I think engineerd is the PC guy from the commercials. (Image source: Gadgetspace.com)

In Monday’s Name That Part, we gave you a random chunk of metal. With a bit of guessing and supposition, Zed71 came up with the closest answer to correct; it was, in fact, a Chrysler starter motor, specifically for one of the Mitsubishi engines they borrowed. From there, it has taken a bit of work, but I’m reasonably certain that it belonged to the 3.0L V6 that powered everything from minivans to LeBarons to the Dodge Stealth. That said, engineerd deserves a shout-out as well for a hilarious guess. As usual, he was horribly wrong, but the guess itself was well worth it.
On to today’s Name That Part!
Microsoft is currently in the midst of a foaming-at-the-mouth ad campaign, trying to get us all excited about the upcoming release of Windows 7. Initial advertising focused around telling us that this new release was new, redesigned, improved, and so on. All the buzz-words that usually accompany any new product’s release. Unfortunately, that wasn’t strictly true. Windows 7, in fact, is a re-skinning of the Windows Vista architecture. In a tacit acknowledgment of the error-prone nature of previous releases, advertising claimed that they had fixed all the problems and conflicts Windows users were used to fighting with. In fact, most of those problems were simply solved by the peripheral manufacturers, who had updated their drivers for better Vista compatibility. Windows 7 simply used the same drivers as Vista.
Their next ad campaign was an attempt to reclaim the “PC” title that had been so effectively badmouthed by Apple’s “I’m a Mac” ad campaign. Their “I’m a PC” campaign proudly claimed that PC’s were just as versatile as a Mac, just as compatible, just as easy to use, and a whole lot cheaper. Unfortunately for Microsoft, many of the claims in their ads were either false, misleading, or overstated. Rather than keeping their claims simple, they insisted on making grandiose claims; one ad appeared to claim that a 6-year-old could make a professional-looking home movie in the 20 seconds of the ad. The most recent series of ads have their spokespeople listing a feature they wanted in Windows 7, and then claiming responsibility for coming up with the idea. While obviously tongue-in-cheek, they neither inspire enough controversy to be memorable, nor make their claims amusing enough to warrant parody.
And yet, somehow, despite all these flaws and foibles, Windows remains the single most popular operating system on the planet; and with virtually no uncertainty, Microsoft can be well assured that this new release of Windows will surely be a massive success on a level that virtually every other company out there can only dream of.
What does all this have to do with today’s Name That Part? Well, it’s simple. Like Microsoft, we like hitting you over the head with the blatantly obvious!
Microsoft has decided to try a new technique for their driver installs. Make them bigger, and make them out of metal.
Microsoft has decided to try a new technique for their driver installs. Make them bigger, and make them out of metal.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

The maximum upload file size: 64 MB. You can upload: image, audio, video. Links to YouTube, Facebook, Twitter and other services inserted in the comment text will be automatically embedded. Drop files here

  1. Deartháir Avatar
    Deartháir

    Dear WordPress. Stop fucking up my shit. Love, Dearthair.

  2. Jo_Schmo Avatar

    There is some irony in here somewhere…

  3. Deartháir Avatar
    Deartháir

    I think there'd be even more irony if I were writing it on a Mac.

  4. Tim Odell Avatar
    Tim Odell

    I am so tempted to go into the admin page and screw with this comment.

  5. engineerd Avatar

    I always imagined you as the Mac guy, but with more moose on the head. Also, are you in the parts area at your local Canadian Tire just taking random pictures stuff?
    Based on your all-new-but-not-really rebranding-because-the-old-one-had-a-bad-rep logic, I'm going to say a window motor for a Ford Five Hundred aka Taurus.

    1. SSurfer321 Avatar

      I agree.
      Also Windows 7 is all-new-but-not-really rebranding-because-the-old-one-had-a-bad-rep logic of Windows Vista. Window Vista's development codename was Longhorn. Taurus is a bull shaped constellation with long horns. We've logically proven the solution twice with different method's. I don't see how we can be wrong. Right!?

      1. engineerd Avatar

        If you work the same problem out with two different methods and you arrive at the same answer, it has to be right!

  6. FuzzyPlushroom Avatar

    Yesterday's: I'm proud to have helped send one of those, and the beat-ass Dodge Spirit surrounding it, to the boneyard the other day.
    Today's: It's a can opener.

  7. Alff Avatar

    It's a servo from animatronic Steve Balmer. No?
    How about a power window motor from Camry, the most popular appliance on the planet.

  8. Jo_Schmo Avatar

    It's a power Macintosh motor from a Vista Cruiser.

  9. Deartháir Avatar
    Deartháir

    Animatronic Steve Balmer. Suddenly I'm very frightened.
    "Drive faster, Daddy!"
    "I can't! IT'S A GEO!"

  10. BGW Avatar

    Sausage grinder attachment for an '05 F-150.

    1. Charles_Barrett Avatar

      Yeah… It mounts right above the truck nutz…

  11. Maymar Avatar

    I'm assuming the obvious part is that it's a power window motor. I'll guess it's from a Chevy Cobalt, because like most Windows systems, it was heralded as the next big thing, rather than the next okay thing it was, but then will spend years being derided as the next giant turd.

  12. .357-Flying High Avatar

    It hurts so good.

  13. joshuman Avatar

    Does that make Fake Steve Jobs more real or more animatronic?

  14. citroen67 Avatar

    Or, could it be a window motor for a Renault 7?
    Get it?
    window…?
    7…?
    because of the…awe fer-git it.

  15. citroen67 Avatar

    Or is it a power window motor for a Mack truck?!?
    *shakes fist at computer screen*

    1. muthalovin Avatar

      Can I get on-board with all 3 of these guesses? Thanks!

    2. EscortsForever Avatar

      no, no, no – It's obviously for the power windows in a caterham se7en.
      Wait… crap, nevermind.

  16. Alff Avatar

    Love the tags, BTW. Who will play that other role?

  17. longrooffan Avatar

    That is the most clever comment here. Bravo.

  18. engineerd Avatar

    Congrats on having the [most right] answer! I will be sending you a case of engineerd Hooniverse brefass scotch™ via PT Cruiser.
    What, it's a Chrysler!

  19. Z71 Avatar

    I first thought it was a distributor until others suggested a starter and then I noticed it had no caps on top. Then I thought of the most basterdized car ever- the Chrysler TC, and there's your answer. Oh, and I think I'll just walk to go pick up my Brefass Scotch. I don't want the PT to ruin the flavor.

  20. engineerd Avatar

    Steve Balmer's not the animatron. Steve Jobs is. The real Steve Jobs died last year.
    (If this comment is indexed by Google, expect to see Apple stock sell off.)

  21. Age_of_Aerostar Avatar

    SLIGHTLY off topic, but bear with me here……
    3 engineers are driving in a car, an electrical engineer, a mechanical engineer, and a software engineer. They are driving down the road when the car suddenly stalls and they pull to the side of the road.
    The electrical engineer says, it must be something with the alternator or battery system, looks around, pokes at a few things, but the car won't start.
    The mechanical engineer says, you're all wrong, it's something mechanical,and also proceeds to poke around under the hood at this and that, to no avail.
    The software engineer says, guys, guys, guys, you're all wrong, all we have to do to get it working again is close all the windows, shut it down completely, get out of the car, wait a minute, get back into the car, open up all the windows and try it again……..
    (the car starts)

    1. Deartháir Avatar
      Deartháir

      Clearly it's a Volkswagen. I can't even count how many times I've had a problem with my car, and solved it by shutting it off and starting it again.

  22. citroen67 Avatar

    I'm going to guess it's a window regulator for an Oldsmobile Vista Cruiser.

    1. blueplate Avatar

      Geez, when Jo_Schmo said this, I did not understand it at all without the bold print. Thank you for clarificating.

      1. citroen67 Avatar

        Yeah, because my comment was exactly like his…

    2. FuzzyPlushroom Avatar

      This, but a Toyota Vista.

  23. legit free ipad Avatar

    help me. I cant read the first post properly. Thats what I came here to read so please help me.

%d bloggers like this: