Last Call: What we really need is a wood paneled Bronco

Colby Buchanan

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When I was a kid, like really little, Woodie cars were my favorite. I have no idea why but they were. So for me, wood paneling has a way of bringing that childhood nostalgia back. As you might expect, when I saw this render I instantly fell in love with it. Apart from the wood, green is my favorite color and this shade with the canoe and the lake in the background is all perfect. I know it will never be made unless it’s from some tiny company that will make 5 of them and charges 100k each but hey, at least it’s in my dreams now. What do you guys think?

Last Call indicates the end of Hooniverse’s broadcast day. It’s meant to be an open forum for anyone and anything. Thread jacking is not only accepted, it’s encouraged.

About

Colby Buchanan

Colby Buchanan

My name is Colby Buchanan and I love all things car-related all the way from rusted 240sx’s to McLaren Senna’s and of course I have a soft spot for American Muscle. You can spot me in my bone stock ’06 350z named MackenZ.

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23 responses to “Last Call: What we really need is a wood paneled Bronco”

  1. 0A5599 Avatar
    0A5599

    I went to the self-service salvage yard last week and found a wood-paneled station wagon with the same color scheme as mine. I might try to go back this weekend.

    In theory, a wood-paneled Bronco could be a good thing, but the proportions are all wrong for the one in the picture.

    Reply
    1. nanoop Avatar
      nanoop

      Proportions are off, looks like a marketing exercise to me.
      I always thought that wooden panels are a workaround for lack of the large tools (stamps or presses or what they are called). Were the wooden panels offered as an alternative to pressed steel, with a markup? That would render the Bronco true to the original idea…

      Reply
      1. 0A5599 Avatar
        0A5599

        More likely fan art than marketing.

        Early station wagons were custom-bodied, much like the way a modern automaker might provide a truck chassis and partial bodywork to a specialty company to finish into an ambulance. Large body dies were indeed difficult to produce in those days, but also keep in mind that station wagons were specialty vehicles, without a lot of production volume to amortize costs, and wood was a lot easier to custom configure.

        Reply
  2. Batshitbox Avatar
    Batshitbox

    I’m suffering time dilation, so help me out:

    Are you nostalgic for the “wood paneled” cars of the 1970s & 80s? Like the Country Squires and Chrysler K-Cars? Because those cars were themselves retro-styled to look like the wooden bodied pre-war cars.
    Are you saying we need a 21st century Bronco that is an homage to the retro styled malaise era cars that were nostalgic for the early 20th century cars? Can I have the badges written in recursive script?

    I’m just about to throw my hands up and say, “Eff It. Have the Bronco, I’ll take the strip built canoe” but the seizure inducing geometry of the gunwales in that render are just too much for me. II keep expecting Cthulhu to jump out of the interstices.

    Reply
    1. Wayne Moyer Avatar
      Wayne Moyer

      It is a nostalgia thing but my ’86 Ford Country Squire’s fake wood actually looked good on it. Ford did a nice job of making the fake wood fit the design instead of just slapping it on their like GM did with their wagons or how Chrysler did with the PT Cruiser and other models they slapped it on.

      Reply
      1. 0A5599 Avatar
        0A5599

        Which GM wagons are you referring to? The woodgrain on the boxy 1977-90 B-body GMs was pretty comparable to the woodgrain on the boxy Panther Ford wagons. It probably helps that those Ford and GM wagons have silhouettes that are very similar, and slab sides without a lot of curves, and they were designed around the same time and were sold for more than a decade with only minor changes.

        GM C-body wagons, or the “whale” B-body wagons 1991-96 are a lot curvier, and woodgrain on those is more of an essence than an attempt at realism.

        https://images-wixmp-ed30a86b8c4ca887773594c2.wixmp.com/f/88c4706a-565c-4f0a-acfc-b914df984541/dd7k2i9-1490a485-fc92-4d32-95af-dffe9b6b2035.jpg?token=eyJ0eXAiOiJKV1QiLCJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiJ9.eyJzdWIiOiJ1cm46YXBwOiIsImlzcyI6InVybjphcHA6Iiwib2JqIjpbW3sicGF0aCI6IlwvZlwvODhjNDcwNmEtNTY1Yy00ZjBhLWFjZmMtYjkxNGRmOTg0NTQxXC9kZDdrMmk5LTE0OTBhNDg1LWZjOTItNGQzMi05NWFmLWRmZmU5YjZiMjAzNS5qcGcifV1dLCJhdWQiOlsidXJuOnNlcnZpY2U6ZmlsZS5kb3dubG9hZCJdfQ.ObevyW8L6niDV7mn0rLU2vAx3lwWjEXMJ2swJD6rT6k

        https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/d/d1/Ford_LTD_Country_Squire-1.jpg/1200px-Ford_LTD_Country_Squire-1.jpg

        https://cimg4.ibsrv.net/gimg/www.thehulltruth.com-vbulletin/640×306/80-1988_chevrolet_caprice_estate_woody_beautiful_9_passenger_station_wagon_7_e550fbca965729821a4026e024687553e20d6fe2.jpg

        Reply
    2. 0A5599 Avatar
      0A5599

      Yes, nostalgic for fake woodgrain, but no, not for the Bronco. It needs Freewheeling graphics instead.

      https://www.cjponyparts.com/resources/ford-free-wheeling-trucks

      Reply
  3. Vairship Avatar
    Vairship

    Wouldn’t you really rather have a Dodge Nitro? You *know* you do! https://www.nitroforumz.com/media/woody-nitro-lowered.8697/full?d=1398335264 https://www.nitroforumz.com/cdn-cgi/image/format=auto,onerror=redirect,width=1920,height=1920,fit=scale-down//media/woody-nitro-lowered.8697/full?d=1398335264 There’s one in my neighborhood that looks a lot like this. I guess compared to any other Nitro, why not? ;-

    Reply
  4. Maymar Avatar
    Maymar

    If I’m getting an anachronistic paint job on a new Bronco, I’m borrowing from a later full-size model and getting sundowner stripes or an Eddie Bauer.

    https://www.bronco6g.com/forum/attachments/sundown-jpg.5251/
    https://www.bronco6g.com/forum/attachments/269165ce-9dc9-4c7d-829f-3d5f62b0e0db-jpeg.5386/

    Reply
  5. Lokki Avatar
    Lokki

    I am fascinated at the amazing level of interest In the new Bronco. It seems to be a blank canvas upon which everyone projects their personal dreams and desires. Whatever it is, it is definitely -not- just another unibody CUV with derivative styling and an iconic name glued to it.

    Reply
    1. Sjalabais Avatar
      Sjalabais

      Agreed, but I also think the timing is good. Can’t remember another moment in recent years when people bascially just sat at home and consumed whatever the internet threw at them.

      Reply
    2. Batshitbox Avatar
      Batshitbox

      The new Bronco is “internet famous” which, like the Jeep Gladiator, may not translate into sales. Personally I hope that signals the start of the bursting of the Influencer Bubble; marketers will realize that paying people to hype products online only results in a lot of online hype, not profits.
      I’m sick of being treated like a child the month before Christmas, like the second coming of the Bronco is literally the Second Coming, and that I should absolutely shit myself every time a new picture of it emerges.

      Reply
      1. Sjalabais Avatar
        Sjalabais

        You said it better.

        *raises glass*

        …but: For people to come to rational conclusions, you assume that there be no people involved.
        https://i.imgflip.com/49emhj.jpg

        Reply
      2. Sjalabais Avatar
        Sjalabais

        You said it better.

        *raises glass*

        …but: For people to come to rational conclusions, you assume that there be no people involved.
        https://i.imgflip.com/49emhj.jpg

        Reply
    3. Batshitbox Avatar
      Batshitbox

      The new Bronco is “internet famous” which, like the Jeep Gladiator, may not translate into sales. Personally I hope that signals the start of the bursting of the Influencer Bubble; marketers will realize that paying people to hype products online only results in a lot of online hype, not profits.
      I’m sick of being treated like a child the month before Christmas, like the second coming of the Bronco is literally the Second Coming, and that I should absolutely shit myself every time a new picture of it emerges.

      Reply
  6. Sjalabais Avatar
    Sjalabais

    Three layers of rust converter/primer and two layers of 13 year old touch up paint (*goo) make what I optimistically assume to be a temporary fix to my short but intense bumper car affair with a local guard rail.

    https://i.ibb.co/FxLh1Hr/IMG-20200725-210458.jpg

    Reply
    1. Batshitbox Avatar
      Batshitbox

      Excellent! As I clean the Econoline I think about how to effect repairs on the minor dings (ignoring, for now, the major damage) but they’re everywhere on that truck, and it’s white so it will end up looking like it has The Pox. At that point only a re-spray will save it and… how did I get from fixing a few small dings to repainting the whole van?!?

      Reply
      1. 0A5599 Avatar
        0A5599

        If it’s that dinged up, go the other direction and dimple it like a golf ball.

        Reply
      2. Sjalabais Avatar
        Sjalabais

        Oh, I understand that. Had a ’93 Volvo 245 once that was white. Fixing chips on the hood the same rough and ready way as above has been a standard for me, but on the white car, I ended up spraying the entire hood. On the tailgate, white “fixes” looked so bad, I ended up adding a black contrast stripe to cover small damage.

        Given where you live, why not go for rainbow colours?

        Reply
        1. Batshitbox Avatar
          Batshitbox

          Given where I live rainbow colors are cliché. I might paint it hot pink and call it “The Van Of The Fuchsia”. I have an industrial photo printer that makes 5-foot wide prints. If I printed a close up of a human eye and pasted it on there I could call it “Ivan”.

          Reply
          1. Sjalabais Avatar
            Sjalabais

            You don’t need any help finding ideas, I see. Ivan is awesome.

  7. SlowJoeCrow Avatar
    SlowJoeCrow

    The wood on a Bronco seems wrong. Ford never did that in the 60s and 70s so it’s wrong now, unlike say a woodgrain Ford Flex which immediatley evokes the Country Squire. This picture looks more like a 50s Chrysler.

    Reply
  8. HuntRhymesWith Avatar
    HuntRhymesWith

    If they make that, it needs to appear in a remake of Deliverance

    Reply