Last Call-Valentino Rossi Eat Your Heart Out Edition

Yellow slippers, plastic handlebar basket, Pall Mall dangling from his lips, there’s nothing un-epic about this picture.
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  1. Alff Avatar

    Tanshanomi at 15.

    1. Peter Tanshanomi Avatar
      Peter Tanshanomi

      I never smoked. But other than that…um, yea.

  2. Paul_y Avatar

    This is serious human-powered hoonage.

  3. Tim Odell Avatar
    Tim Odell

    Polo helmet FTW.

  4. Alff Avatar

    I hate to say it, but I don't believe he is moving. The blurring under his left knee suggest some postproduction shenanigans and I would expect to see some blurring of the spokes. Also, I think it would be very difficult to pull this manuever without having your left foot on the pedal.

    1. Spats Avatar

      also the guy would be retarded to try this in sandals. would have his toes ripped off.

    2. Fred Avatar

      I think the "blurring" under his knee is a knee-pad !

  5. BЯдΖǐL-ЯЄРΘЯΤЄЯ Avatar
  6. Feds_II Avatar

    Let me start this by saying: I'm a fat guy. I'm 5'9, 190-ish lbs, and 24% body fat, according to my scale.
    Last week, I decided it was time to get back into shape (or a shape other than "Round"). 5:30 Monday morning, I rode my bike over to the local park, which has a bunch of outdoor workout gear, and sweated it up for an hour.
    Tuesday morning, 5:30, I felt pretty stiff in my upper body, so I decided I would just go on an hour bike ride. Ride out 25 minutes, turn around and come home. Well, since my ride out was predominantly up hill, I arrived home before my hour was up. I decided to do one more lap of the block (about another 2km). So, down the hill past my house, top gear on the bike, pedaling hard. I approach the first corner of the block, inside pedal up, lean it in, and gracefully carve the corner.
    Just past the apex, a thought hits me: "If I were on the motorcycle, this is where I would open up the throttle…" So I start pedaling. Still leaned over.
    WHAM! inside pedal hits the ground with a scraping thud, bike pinwheels out from under me, and I hit the pavement. Knee, hip, elbow, and cheek bone. Then I bounce, and hit the pavement again. then I stop.
    Its lucky I was leaned over as much as I was, as the fall to the pavement was not far, so the relative speed between my head and the asphalt was low. I ended up with a nice piece of road rash on the side of my face, which coincidentally was later immortalized in my new passport photo, and a sore jaw.
    In all of that action, I would like to think for a brief second I looked somewhere near as cool as the JDM dude pictured above.

    1. damnelantra™[!] Avatar

      forward planing, notice his pedal on the inside is raised.

    2. skitter Avatar

      I've done the same on a friend's mountain bike with tiny road wheels mounted. Except I catapulted myself over the bike to land on my opposite side. I've hit the ground enough times, so I knew it was a good fall and I didn't break anything. I slid so long I had time to consciously think "This is going to hurt like crap," before I slammed into a parked car. Tore off one big elbow scar and upgraded to a bigger one, and impressively abraded my shoulder without actually tearing my shirt. Naturally, my friend behind me missed the entire crash, and was confused by the suddenly empty bike and me wedged in a Camry.

    3. ChuckyShamrok Avatar

      Ah Bicycle accidents, I really have too many to tell (I ride BMX) but here are my two favorites. Flash back to this past Thanksgiving . I had to work, so I spent the day finishing working on my project bike (Peugeot road bike my boss was tossing in the dumpster) I bring the bike home and after dinner me and my father go for a ride. The bike is pedaling down the road great, so I start hot dogging and start riding with no hands on the bars. I hit a tiny hole in the road, and the front end gets squirrelly, the wheel spins perpendicular to the street and the back comes up. I somehow managed to jump off the bike and do a little dance down the street, never fell off the bike. My dad is says "what just happened?" after he hears the bike hit the pavement. This happens right in front of two old dudes on their porch.
      Second story,
      This takes place ages ago, maybe 10. I'm going down a hill on my full suspension mountain bike, right when these were brand new hot ticket bikes. This bike would get me laid was the main thought in my pubescent head as I'm bombing down a hill. I take a sharp left and I drag my left foot to help keep me up like those circle trackers dudes do. Well this being New England there is sand on the road 10 months of the year and the bike's tires hit a sand patch and went out from under me. I do a split, which in painful in itself and slide to the end of the road, where again there are two dudes hangin out on a porch. One pronounces me "Safe!"
      I now really hate dudes who hang out on porches, and am especially leary of them when I am riding a bicycle

      1. zaddikim Avatar

        …where again there are two dudes hangin out on a porch. One pronounces me "Safe!"
        Made. My. Day.
        Thank you!

    4. FuzzyPlushroom Avatar

      You've got me beaten – my only recent bicycle accident was last night, caused by me not paying attention, and resulted in me being unable to get back on the pavement (might've been fine with one of the mountain bikes, but not the hybrid), the bike going sideways, and me rolling off and absorbing it with my shoulder. Both knees and one shin are a little bruised, and I think my left knee's going to be hurting for a while, but hey, that'll show me. It reminded me to properly tighten my handlebars, too, because the guy who gave me the bike wasn't the sharpest, and folded 'em sideways for transport rather than removing the front wheel.

  7. FuzzyPlushroom Avatar

    You go right ahead and tell him it's a woman's bike. I'll stand back here and watch.