Hooniverse News Network- Toyota Matrix Car Wash Attack!

Wetter Pussycat – Kill! Kill!

The Cape Cod Times is reporting that a South Dennis woman was dragged through a Rte 134 car wash by her Toyota. Carol Burton-Groman, 74, of South Yarmouth got out of her 2008 Matrix, but then was inexplicably drawn back to the car, as if under its spell, and was dragged into the Shell car wash as the pusher mechanism engaged.

Burton-Groman was able to free herself, but not before being dragged through the wash. The unattended Matrix attempted to make a clean getaway, but was foiled by an opportunistically placed tree at the edge of the service station’s parking lot. Burton-Groman was taken to the hospital complaining of pain to her lag and hip, but is currently reported in stable condition.

There is no word from Toyota whether this incident will spur another spate of recalls, or possible owner warning to only hand-wash their cars, but remains yet another black mark on the already besmirched reputation of the automaker.

TRUTH TIME: While it is truly sad  that a little old lady got dragged through a car wash (stop laughing!) the above should be read as satire, and I posted this to bring up a point, which is that not all Toyota-related injuries are the fault of the corporation, or their products. There are people digging back ten or twenty years to claim accidents involving Toyotas for which they have been blamed were really the fault of the car. This despite the fact that those cars shared nothing with the modern cars that do seem to have issues. This “Toyota Defense” is becoming a prevalent method to scapegoat the carmaker, and potentially offering an out for those convicted of criminal vehicular actions, but that doesn’t make it right.

So, if you drive a Toyota, go ahead and patronize the car wash- just pay attention to the signs.

Image source: [wikimedia]

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