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Hooniverse Asks: What tech do cars need that they don’t already have?

Jeff Glucker

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Today I’m driving a 2021 Mercedes-Benz S580. It’s for that paying gig I have over with Autotrader where they let me make the talkies. As a total MB fanboy, I knew I was going to like this thing. But as a fan of tech things in general, this car is insane. It’s fitted with a 30-speaker Burmeister sound system complete with in-seat bass resonators (which you can adjust the intensity of or just shut off completely). The headrests are heated. And the gauge cluster can project a 3D-like display through the use of a pair of cameras and eye-tracking software, and it actually works well.

There’s so much tech in this thing. Thankfully, it’s still extremely comfortable, drives amazingly well, and has a commanding S-Class-level presence on the road. It’s not just tech for the sake of tech, but it’s close.

But is it missing anything? What sort of tech do you wish was available on cars today? What haven’t automakers thought of that would be a welcome addition to your daily commute?

About

Jeff Glucker

Jeff Glucker

Jeff Glucker is the co-founder and Executive Editor of Hooniverse.com. He’s often seen getting passed as he hustles a 1991 Mitsubishi Montero up the 405 Freeway. IG: @HooniverseJeff

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11 responses to “Hooniverse Asks: What tech do cars need that they don’t already have?”

  1. OA5599 Avatar
    OA5599

    Woodgrain.

    Reply
    1. Maymar Avatar
      Maymar

      https://media.ed.edmunds-media.com/jeep/grand-wagoneer/2022/fe/2022_jeep_grand-wagoneer_hlight_fe_901201_717.jpg

      Even something as minor as the trim around the headlights they had on the concept version would be a nice nod to the original.

      Reply
      1. OA5599 Avatar
        OA5599

        BTW, others already cracked the code to embedding online photos, but I figured it out yesterday for myself and want to share that knowledge.

        1. Copy the link to the picture.
        2. Begin the comment. Below the name/email/website fields, there’s one for attachments. Click the Choose Files button.
        3. A dialog box pops up. In the File Name field, paste the link to the picture.
        4. Complete the comment and click Post Comment n the usual way.

        Reply
        1. wunno sev Avatar
          wunno sev

          who knew? the Grand Wagoneer has a small BMW embedded in the front end.

          Reply
  2. Zentropy Avatar
    Zentropy

    From my perspective, the question is really “What types of technology do cars already have that they don’t need?” Honestly, I’d be completely satisfied driving a mid-60s American car with a disc brake upgrade, EFI conversion, and retrofitted Apple CarPlay.

    Reply
    1. outback_ute Avatar
      outback_ute

      There are only so many bytes available on the internet!

      Reply
  3. Sjalabenz Avatar
    Sjalabenz

    I always think that stuff like the above is gimmicky and kind of corny, but then I talk to people who actually buy these cars, and they love it. One guy I know gets the newest and biggest E Class every three years or so, and just the light show the front lights do to “adjust the laser beams” or whatever makes him smile like a child every time. I mean, good for him, obviously, Mercedes knows their customer base better than some random half-Soviet who can’t shut up, sitting on a barren piece of rock at the Arctic circle.

    What cars need? I always want moar stats. Why not integrate OBD-style access to the cars data into the infotainment system, and take no prisoners. Show everything and delight the people who actually want to see that.

    Reply
    1. Salguod Avatar
      Salguod

      Yes, please. I love this idea.

      Reply
  4. Lokki Avatar
    Lokki

    As a fan of Russian dash-cam footage, I don’t understand why today’s cars don’t have dash-cams built in. Just put camera in the front windscreen with sensors to activate the camera when something in front comes within a specified distance. Let it record all the time the car is in motion automatically. Heck, my house has a little security camera that records like that and when the storage is full starts to record over oldest footage. For what it’s worth, the rear camera is already installed so there it would just be a matter of adding a hard drive et al for storage to it and some software changes. For luxury cars I would also add a driver’s door camera that photographs anyone who approaches the door (say unless that person has the car fob et al) and alerts the owner via text message. My car already communicates in real time with my phone (doors, lights, ventilation, remaining range etc) so it would be simple to have the car both record and notify you immediately of anyone peering in the window.

    Reply
    1. Sjalabais Avatar
      Sjalabais

      Well, Tesla is the only company I know of that already does that. With Tesla being Tesla, I guess other companies don’t want to be seen copying them.

      When it comes to houses, something like Hue-for-cars would be neat, too. Like: If car at home (GPS), temperature above 25°C (existing sensor), dry conditions (new sensor) = open roof. Not everyone would want that, but those who like it, would appreciate the functionality.

      Reply
  5. Salguod Avatar
    Salguod

    I don’t understand why we can’t have preselected speeds in the cruise control. I pretty much always choose one of a handful of speeds, why not let me store those an pick one as I enter the freeway?

    Probably some liability issues or something.

    Reply