Hooniverse Asks- What Horrible Car Do You Desperately Want to Own?

Robert Emslie

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All-New Land Rover Discovery 3

Do you want to know who your worst enemy frequently turns out to be? Check out the mirror my friend. That’s right, most people do things that aren’t necessarily in their best interests, very often preceded with one of two phrases – Here, hold my beer or Watch this. Of course as Darwin pointed out, this may just be nature’s way of culling the monumentally stupid and uncoordinated from the rest of us. . .  who are just modestly afflicted with those attributes.

But when it comes to buying cars, making the wrong decision is more likely to cause damage to your bank account than corporeal harm. The thing of it is, while for the most part creatures of reason, we often times let rationalizations overrule our common sense. That’s why women sometimes marry rebellious men that they think they can change, and men on occasion bring strippers home to meet mom. It’s also what keeps people buying cars and trucks like Land Rover Discos, carbureted Maserati Biturbos, and ’80s Alfa Romeos.

That’s right, these are all examples of cars that, while expressing a certain level of appeal are in no uncertain terms terrible cars that will suck your wallet dry faster than drunken weekend in Vegas. There are lots of horrible cars and trucks – some of which have always have been so, owing to a particular element of their design (Lancia Monte Carlo brakes being an example), or to their age, becoming horrible money pits as time goes by. We all have our crosses to bear, a car or truck that we know is bad for us, but which we still want to someday possess. Which is yours?

Image source: [Mirror]

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Robert Emslie

Robert Emslie

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231 responses to “Hooniverse Asks- What Horrible Car Do You Desperately Want to Own?”

  1. $kaycog Avatar
    $kaycog

    Edsels have a horrible reputation, but I like them. I have a space in my garage for one, station wagon or otherwise.
    <img src="http://www.stationwagonforums.com/forums/gallery/files/1/1958_edsel_bermuda_station_wagon2.jpg"width="500"/&gt;
    Image: stationwagonforums.com

    Reply
    1. Kris_01 Avatar
      Kris_01

      Edsels get a bad rap especially from non-car people. Quality wise, they're no worse than anything else from the era, if anything they may be a little better due to the placement of Edsel as being a senior Ford.
      And what flop? Cripes, Ford sold how many Edsels in '58? 63,000? I don't think Toyota sold that many last-gen Celicas, and we don't hear about that being a flop.
      The Edsel's problem was timing. A big expensive car made sense at the time of planning. It just had the bad luck to be released right in the middle of the first real national recession since the end of the war.
      It's always, always about the 58's horse collar grille and ingrown-toenail taillights that grates with people. For this reason the make always gets trashed.

      Reply
      1. DemonXanth Avatar
        DemonXanth

        From what I understand the major reliability issue that they had was the slip rings and electric motors that operated the push button transmission. Neither of which are really insurmountable issues.

        Reply
      2. Maymar Avatar
        Maymar

        On the other hand, Mercury sold almost twice as many cars in '58 than Edsel. Yes, they were an established brand, but they were higher priced. It was also much lower than Ford projected (even allowing for the recession, I imagine). As much as Toyota didn't sell many Celicas, they never planned on it.
        As far as quality goes, apparently Edsels were worse than their Ford/Mercury counterparts (at least at first), because the workers were poorly able to adapt to the different cars coming down the production line.

        Reply
    2. HycoSpeed Avatar
      HycoSpeed

      Edsels are awesome.
      I tried to post a picture of one in Baja form, but for some reason images don't seem to work from my phone. Very sad.

      Reply
      1. $kaycog Avatar
        $kaycog

        This is one of my favorite Edsel pictures. I also have a video of it in a parade.
        <img src="http://www.strangefarmer.com/images/content/156341.jpg"width="500"/&gt;

        Reply
  2. DemonXanth Avatar
    DemonXanth

    I've texted a guy about a '64 Corvair, but he hasn't answered my questions. The craigslist ad is down so I don't think he's going to. The '65 Corvair I inquired to before Christmas had deeper rust than I could handle with my skill set.

    Reply
    1. Mad_Hungarian Avatar
      Mad_Hungarian

      Sorry (says the '64 Corvair owner), a '64 Corvair is not a horrible car. Hope you find one. Stay away from the rust buckets. In fact, late model rust buckets are worse than earlies because the late model rust always involves the windshield channel.

      Reply
      1. DemonXanth Avatar
        DemonXanth

        That is exactly why I don't have a '65 Corvair right now.

        Reply
      2. DemonXanth Avatar
        DemonXanth

        Going off on a tangent here…
        …the guy with the '64 started communicating. Anything in particular I should keep an eye out for? It's $1450 and looks like it needs some interior work at the very least.

        Reply
        1. Vairship Avatar
          Vairship

          Look out for rust around the windshield/A-pillar area and in general between the (forward) trunk and passenger compartment. And if it's the 110 horsepower engine, check for dropped valve seats (although in general the 110 hp is just about the best engine for a Corvair, as it's a good mix of low RPM torque an high RPM horsepower).
          In general, since it's a unit body, make sure that the main body (rocker panels etc) are in good shape, almost everything else is available from the aftermarket for very reasonable prices. But if the car needs a ton of work, keep in mind that even museum piece Corvairs aren't going to be worth a fortune. So if you do end up spending lots of money on it, do so because you want to keep the car a long time (and because you know how well the work has been done), not because you think it'll sell for a million at some auction…

          Reply
          1. DemonXanth Avatar
            DemonXanth

            I know $5k gets a pretty damned good one. This is $1450 has some what looks like surface rust on the panel behind the rear seat, needs some interior work, and the driver's window doesn't roll all the way up. Going to look at it in person Saturday morning. I'm not looking for perfection, just a fun ride that I can make incremental improvements over the years. I don't buy vehicles with resale in mind. 🙂
            <img src="https://lh6.googleusercontent.com/-OlJwfy2PwAQ/UQgurgbvBvI/AAAAAAAABKY/6Hqkv5_LQpg/s408/imagejpeg_6.jpg&quot; width="400/">
            Wish me luck and thanks for the tips.

          2. DemonXanth Avatar
            DemonXanth

            That was some good info, I ended up picking up a '61 that's had a '64 rear suspension upgrade. The original center section was still in the trunk, and caused a couple small holes that need to be patched up. https://picasaweb.google.com/11451668419641202312…
            Hopefully it'll be roaming the road soon, the first things on the to do list are to replace the pushrod tube seals and put seatbelts.
            …well, after getting more money since the DMV's gonna take it all due to back fees.

  3. Alan Avatar
    Alan

    For me it has to be a Citroen SM. A lovely car, but the love child of Citroen and Maserati so not blessed with the reliability gene and probably perforated with rust.

    Reply
  4. muthalovin Avatar
    muthalovin

    What? I'm not weird. You are. You are weird.
    <img src="http://www.oldcarbrochures.org/var/albums/New-Brochures—November/1974-Ford-Mustang-II-Folder/1974%20Mustang%20II%20Folder-04.jpg?m=1353449824&quot; width=550>

    Reply
    1. Maymar Avatar
      Maymar

      Horrible's relative. It's much less likely to strand you than the much prettier Vega (which I want).

      Reply
      1. buzzboy7 Avatar
        buzzboy7

        My mom had a brand new Vega when they first came out. If I recall correctly she was adding a quart of oil every fill up or two and was changing sparkplugs at oil change increments. Within 5 years the rust was so bad that she was standing on the door sill and fell through it.
        They sure were pretty cars though. It's too bad they were so terrible.

        Reply
        1. seguin Avatar
          seguin

          My brother's father in law loves Vegas….once they're sleeved. He would buy ones that others had given up on, put cast iron sleeves in instead of reboring and reetching them, and from what he says, they'd run forever without an issue after that.

          Reply
    2. erikgrad Avatar
      erikgrad

      In that advertisement, they are swinging that club awfully close to those delicate taillights…

      Reply
    3. Peter Tanshanomi Avatar
      Peter Tanshanomi

      Well, if that's a horrible car, then EVERY car from '73-'78 would be horrible!
      Ahhhhh, yea; nevermind.

      Reply
      1. Stigshift Avatar
        Stigshift

        Sorry! My fat fingers aren't used to iPads yet. That was supposed to be a thumbs up. My apologies…

        Reply
  5. beltedradial Avatar
    beltedradial

    Your post pretty much covered me. There's a Biturbo for sale right now with a conveniently pres-split head gasket for 10k. Surely a bargain! Also tempted by every Alfa Romeo GTV I ever see.

    Reply
    1. dculberson Avatar
      dculberson

      $10k??? A broken Biturbo is worth less than $1000 in pristine condition. Seriously. I've seen them for $250. They aren't worth $10k in absolutely showroom new condition. A nice runner is worth around $3500 maybe. Adjust up a bit if it's in perfect condition, down a lot if not.

      Reply
  6. Number_Six Avatar
    Number_Six

    I'm not sure if this counts because really it's just other people that find the Renault Avantime horrible.
    <img src="http://www.carkeys.co.uk/image.php?image=/sites/default/files/rnava000a.jpg&w=483&h=251&c=False&r=0&quot; />

    Reply
    1. Stigshift Avatar
      Stigshift

      Okay, now I need one of those too.

      Reply
      1. vroomsocko Avatar
        vroomsocko

        Seconded!

        Reply
    2. faberferrum Avatar
      faberferrum

      I love those things!

      Reply
    3. Irishzombieman Avatar
      Irishzombieman

      I've always sorta had a thing for the Espace convertible.
      <img src="http://thumbsnap.com/s/Qg97Nrs7.jpg&quot; width=400>

      Reply
    4. rpdred6 Avatar
      rpdred6

      wtf is that hahah

      Reply
      1. HSA Avatar
        HSA

        The Avantime? It's an NPV. Like, MPV stands for Multi-Purpose Vehicle, NPV is a No-Purpose Vehicle.

        Reply
        1. Vairship Avatar
          Vairship

          You heathen! How can you go wrong with a 4 person minivan coupe?
          It has a button that, with just one push, will lower all 4 side windows AND open the sunroof. Clearly this makes it a great dog hauler!

          Reply
          1. HSA Avatar
            HSA

            What makes you think NPV is a derogatory term?! It's great.

  7. Maymar Avatar
    Maymar

    <img src="http://www.seriouswheels.com/pics-2005/2005-smart-nightrun-fa-1600×1200.jpg&quot; width=500 /img>
    I have defended the Smart Fortwo many, many times. I still can't deny that they are seriously flawed cars. I mean, I leave the safety angle out of it, unless we decry the Lotus Elise as just as much (honestly, probably more) of a death trap, to say nothing of conventional subcompacts that don't have so much to prove with active safety. But the smart, especially the OG diesel models we got in Canada, are sort of slow, noisy, not the most comfortable, have all the maintenance costs and reliability history of a early millennium Benz with none of the cachet, and no critique of this oddball is complete without mention of the glacially slow transmission. But at the same time, because they're approaching a decade in Canada (along with the occasional tendency to grenade its engine, and bankrupt you getting it running again), they're getting close to beater money. And that intrigues me. I mean, on one hand, the whole point of the thing is to be hyper-efficient city transportation, which the diesel just crushes it. And yes, it probably doesn't have the Jack Russel Terrier mentality of the gas-powered cars, but I still want to pick one up.
    Of course, that's just one on the long, long list of cars I want to own because I can afford them (conveniently overlooking the reason I can afford them). NG Saab 900s/9-3s (because the OGs have all but disappeared from our roads), Land Rover Discoveries (I have a small spot for the Freelander too, even if more than half the ones on Kijiji and Auto Trader are in need of substantial repair and don't hide it), Benz CL600s, Mazda RX8s, a smattering of Jaguars, W8/W12 VWs, even an off-lease W204 C-Class with stick is probably a terrible idea on a number of fronts.

    Reply
    1. Number_Six Avatar
      Number_Six

      The RX-8 is not horrible, it's just…uh…quirky.

      Reply
      1. Maymar Avatar
        Maymar

        I'm gleefully perpetuating the horrible myth. There's one on Auto Trader for $4100 right now – manual, black on that brownish interior, 170k kms. That is so close to my budget (whatever a 2004 Accent with 130k would fetch), it hurts.
        Plus, used RX8s without the right owner history are a little terrifying.

        Reply
        1. Number_Six Avatar
          Number_Six

          An RX-8 with 170k kms will need its third engine. The rest of it should be fine (apart from the eastern salt tinworm).

          Reply
          1. pj134 Avatar
            pj134

            Sounds like the perfect excuse for a 20B.

          2. FuzzyPlushroom Avatar
            FuzzyPlushroom

            You down with SBC? Yeah, you know me!

    2. CherokeeOwner Avatar
      CherokeeOwner

      +1 on the Smart. I do like small city cars, despite living in a place where parallel-parking a 3/4-ton truck isn't an issue. The Smart does exude cheapness, but the thing does have a starting price of $12.5K, so what do you expect? The old $9,999 Nissan Versa was no better, and the Smart looks a little more interesting than the Versa.

      Reply
      1. Maymar Avatar
        Maymar

        The newer cars are actually pretty decent, at least compared to the old diesel smarts.

        Reply
    3. facelvega Avatar
      facelvega

      I don't think I could ever do a smart, but maybe a smart forfour, and definitely the underpowered but still fun smart coupe, which I think is the only member of the family to come out attractive:
      <img src="http://www.motorstown.com/images/smart-roadster-04.jpg&quot; width="500">

      Reply
    4. Marto Avatar
      Marto

      I have a black early model Smart that looks rather similar to the one above (other than grille, wheels and scratches). After 2 years of ownership I still have a love/hate relationship with it. From drive 1, I knew it was horrible in some aspects and fantastic in others. I came away from that drive literally giggling. So I bought it.
      There's just something about wilful, characterful cars that gets to you. You forgive them in a way you'd never forgive a Corolla.

      Reply
  8. mike Avatar
    mike

    <img src="http://images.classiccars.com/classifieds/240058_12045492_2004_Mercedes-Benz_CL500.jpg&quot; width="600">
    The CL500 is, in my mind, one of the most shapely grand tourers of the early 2000s- to have one in a color combination like the example pictured would be the dream. All you need to worry about is that ABC pump failing on you…or the pneumatic doors…or the gauge cluster…

    Reply
    1. Bruno Balestra Avatar
      Bruno Balestra

      Exactly what I was gonna post, only mine would be the more problematic 600 V12
      I even have the (original) wheels I would want on mine in mind already. And the color scheme. And the places I would take it….

      Reply
    2. rpdred6 Avatar
      rpdred6

      You'd go bankrupt before you drove it off the dealer lot hahah sexy though

      Reply
  9. Stigshift Avatar
    Stigshift

    I have wanted a Trabant ever since I saw one in Annapolis back in the early '90's. I also want a Pontiac T1000 diesel. No, I don't know why either. Oh, and a Lancia Thema 8.32, because if it ever did start and run and drive on the same day, it would no doubt be glorious.

    Reply
    1. Raze1138 Avatar
      Raze1138

      Trabant or Zaporozhyets. A name like Zaporozhyets just rolls off the tongue and exudes class. It just happens in this case, lower. Much like myself. I consider myself a man of class. Lower class mind you, but that's still class…

      Reply
  10. calzonegolem Avatar
    calzonegolem

    I've always thought Prowlers were sexxy. They get a bad rep. for being slow and wobbly, but I get the fiz just thinking about it.
    <img src=http://www.rapidcars.com/Plymouth_Prowler_1.jpg>
    I wonder if they've depreciated enough that I can pick one up as a toy.

    Reply
    1. jeepjeff Avatar
      jeepjeff

      Oh, the Plymouth Prowler. So close to being so awesome, who cares about Chrysler reliability good. KBB says $18,000 for a 2000 with 144,000 miles on it! $36,000 for a 25,000 mile example. Those are suggested retail for Excellent condition, but still. If these were cheaper, I'd be thinking harder about possible engine/transmission swaps. But, as it is, too expensive to pick up and cut into.

      Reply
  11. JayP2112 Avatar
    JayP2112

    About any TVR.
    <img src="http://hooniverse.info/wp-content/uploads/2010/04/2004-TVR-Sagaris-RA-Top-1600×1200-650×487.jpg&quot; width="600">

    Reply
    1. Bruno Balestra Avatar
      Bruno Balestra

      Any Peter Wheeler TVR, or the first Griffith.

      Reply
  12. Alff Avatar
    Alff

    It's a tossup…
    <img src="http://storm.oldcarmanualproject.com/lada/niva/Lada%20Niva%201er.jpg"width=500&gt;
    <img src="http://www.motorstown.com/images/jaguar-xj6c-07.jpg"width=500&gt;

    Reply
    1. Sjalabais Avatar
      Sjalabais

      They look scary together.

      Reply
    2. Peter Tanshanomi Avatar
      Peter Tanshanomi

      No! Don't say that! The Lada Niva isn't horrible!!!
      [stamps feet, runs to bedroom sobbing, slams door, yells "I hate you!" from inside]

      Reply
      1. Alff Avatar
        Alff

        Shh … I'm just perpetuating that myth so I can have them all to myself.

        Reply
    3. mr. mzs zsm msz esq Avatar
      mr. mzs zsm msz esq

      <img src="https://lh3.googleusercontent.com/-eoi-GAeCYb4/UQX5FJQcl2I/AAAAAAAALNI/BYrQC82mnEs/s300/703CEF76-7B39-4898-A091-5D06A6891C09.GIF"&gt; Great choices! Matt L found this recently – a half piping Niva. The potentially cross dressing dad of my friend (I now keep a pair of panty hose with a hole in the back of my cars) went through a Jaguar phase, he's still married but now he's on a VW phase and they sleep in separate homes most nights.
      Those Jag wheels would look great on an Amazon…

      Reply
      1. Alff Avatar
        Alff

        Wow, that is remarkable. I bet you don't get too many tries at that!

        Reply
    4. mr. mzs zsm msz esq Avatar
      mr. mzs zsm msz esq

      [youtube gbdrllUXI3w http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gbdrllUXI3w youtube] Doh, forgot the theme song earlier.

      Reply
    5. Vavon Avatar
      Vavon

      I wanted one too… But I recently discovered I don't fit in it… Sigh!
      Oh well, you can still have a look at this nice period Russian Lada Niva video.
      [youtube TZKGI4YHtT4 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TZKGI4YHtT4 youtube]

      Reply
      1. Alff Avatar
        Alff

        Love The Ventures playing on the soundtrack.

        Reply
      2. mr. mzs zsm msz esq Avatar
        mr. mzs zsm msz esq

        I still think you would fit if you got a racing seat mounted low and far back, don't give-up!

        Reply
        1. Vavon Avatar
          Vavon

          I've started looking for another fun weekend car…
          One that is more "me" too…
          Here's a hint!
          [youtube 3zcm4oS9IaM http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3zcm4oS9IaM youtube]

          Reply
    6. BlackIce_GTS Avatar
      BlackIce_GTS

      The vinyl roof is because the loss of the B-pillars made the body too flexy and the paint would flake off. Modern paint is more flexible though, so you're free to peel it off and respray.
      While you're at it:
      <img src="http://dayerses.com/data_images/posts/broadspeed-jaguar-xj12-c/broadspeed-jaguar-xj12-c-04.jpg"&gt;

      Reply
  13. smalleyxb122 Avatar
    smalleyxb122

    Cosworth Vega
    <img src="http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/4/44/1975_Cosworth_Vega_2.jpg&quot; width=500>

    Reply
    1. JayP2112 Avatar
      JayP2112

      One of the pals I ran around with in highschool had a Cosworth. I never saw it under its own power. 25 years later I asked him thru FB if he still had it- he does and it still doesn't run.

      Reply
      1. wolfie Avatar
        wolfie

        A guy I know has one,it quit running 20 years ago, and is in the back corner of his pole barn.Some kind of dual fuel pump set up that goes to hell.

        Reply
  14. P161911 Avatar
    P161911

    Pontiac Sunbird Turbo convertible with a 5-speed.
    Something like this:
    <img src="http://www.motorbase.com/uploads/2009/01/02/fs_4b5f0318_006.jpg"width=500&gt;
    Or a Land Rover Discovery II.
    Or my 1981 Buick Regal Sport Coupe Turbo Limited back.
    Or a Maserati Quattroporte from the 1980s.
    Or Fiat.

    Reply
    1. themagicboltbox Avatar
      themagicboltbox

      I thought for sure I was the only person left who liked those Sunbirds. I had an '84 in which I had some of the most fun I've had in a car – and done the most walking I've done due to a car too.

      Reply
      1. Kenwood Avatar
        Kenwood

        I'm a Sunbird veteran also. 1984 1.8L OHC station wagon in red. It was my college car and I miss it. At the time it was a major upgrade for me because it had a tilt wheel and the A/C worked. I got 150,000 miles on it when I traded it in on an Audi 90CS (also red). The Subird was FAR more reliable that the Audi was.

        Reply
    2. Peter Tanshanomi Avatar
      Peter Tanshanomi

      Even worse, I want an '87-'88 Sunbird Turbo 5-speed sedan.
      <img src="http://images.thetruthaboutcars.com/2010/11/CC-116-087-800.jpg&quot; width="512">

      Reply
  15. safetystephen Avatar
    safetystephen

    Smart ForTwo convertible. If I cannot have that, a Triumph Spitfire 1500 or Renault Fuego 2.2 will do just fine please. Or a Honda DN-01.

    Reply
  16. SSurfer321 Avatar
    SSurfer321

    B8 A4 Avant. Such a gorgeous wagon but oh the maintenance costs.
    <img src="http://t0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcTU5yzK6wwTb2wf_07FO3zAq-G-1gULveU38NNiZNBEcvAS-6D8&quot;, width=500>
    IMG from Audizine.com

    Reply
    1. JayP2112 Avatar
      JayP2112

      Pretty much any Audi these days.
      The S7 is pure sex.

      Reply
    2. marmer01 Avatar
      marmer01

      B8? Bee Eight? Ha, try daily-driving a B5 Avant. B8s are for wimps!

      Reply
  17. RichardKopf Avatar
    RichardKopf

    Aston Martin Lagonda.
    <img src="http://i79.photobucket.com/albums/j129/hoopd87/9bb7ec4a.jpg&quot; width =600>
    Or, an Alfa Romeo 166:
    <img src="http://i79.photobucket.com/albums/j129/hoopd87/c37b6439.jpg&quot; width=600>

    Reply
    1. JayP2112 Avatar
      JayP2112

      Saw a 166 in the flesh at Cars-Coffee last year.
      I asked about maintenance. He said with the internets, parts aren't too hard to get. Still a scary prospect.

      Reply
    2. EAM3 Avatar
      EAM3

      Damn it… I'll second the Lagonda. In that exact same color.

      Reply
  18. themagicboltbox Avatar
    themagicboltbox

    Citation X11
    2nd gen Corvair
    80's GM B-body wagons
    Mustang II hatcbacks – I got over that one though
    and worst of all, I still think the first-gen Sebring convertible is a good looking car. But I'd never own one.

    Reply
    1. RichardKopf Avatar
      RichardKopf

      Hey now, what's so horrible about an `80s GM B-Body wagon?

      Reply
  19. JayP2112 Avatar
    JayP2112

    New MGs. I have a soft spot for them. That spot must be in my skull.
    <img src="http://gomotors.net/pics/MG/mg-sv-r-x-power-01.jpg&quot; width="600">

    Reply
  20. Devin Avatar
    Devin

    I don't know if it's horrible mechanically…
    <img src="http://image.trucktrend.com/f/8550081/163_news070308_ford_recalls_03z+2002_Lincoln_Blackwood+rear_view.jpg&quot; width="500">
    There's one in my town that I see on occasion, I want to make it mine.
    Also, the Lada Niva pickup:
    <img src="http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3039/2653029132_1d1b6ae0de.jpg"&gt;

    Reply
    1. rpdred6 Avatar
      rpdred6

      oh gosh the Blackwood haha

      Reply
    2. Kamil_K Avatar
      Kamil_K

      That's custom made, right?
      Lada Niva lave alound hela ladaly.

      Reply
      1. Devin Avatar
        Devin

        I think it was an official Niva variation. I spotted on on Calgary Kijiji once and had to stop myself from buying it, and from what I can tell it's really rare but was definitely produced.
        Light googling suggests it was actually a Canadian exclusive – and used Chevy Astro taillights.
        <img src="http://farm9.staticflickr.com/8009/7174944134_040a099dea.jpg&quot; width="380" height="500" alt="1992 Lada Niva (Canada)">

        Reply
    3. name_too_long Avatar
      name_too_long

      Blackwoods are just F150s with some extra chrome and all the "truck" functionality removed.

      Reply
    4. vroomsocko Avatar
      vroomsocko

      I've only seen one Blackwood in the wild, and it was magnificent.

      Reply
  21. OA5599 Avatar
    OA5599

    A 90's Bentley, particularly a Turbo R. They are at a price point now where you can get one with reasonably low miles for less money than a Chrysler with a Bentley kit.
    Here is a 36,000 mile Brooklands with a trunk full of receipts. The listing says 15K in the last year alone, plu many more in the last two years. High bid so far is only $17K.
    <img src=http://i448.photobucket.com/albums/qq201/pinstr4car/1964%20Impala%20Teal/93%20bentley%20brooklands%20black/DSC_0160.jpg" width=500> http://cgi.ebay.com/ebaymotors/Absolutly-beautifu…
    This Turbo R has a buy it now of $17K with free shipping. The seller says it would be worth nearly double with 3-5 days worth of work. that's gotta be some expensive work if he didn't just have it done before listing it.
    <img src="http://i.ebayimg.com/00/s/OTAxWDE2MDA=/$(KGrHqZ,!hIFCtnY+kt3BQ+Mk8v87Q~~60_12.JPG" width=500>
    <a href="http://cgi.ebay.com/ebaymotors/1989-Bentley-Turbo-R-Base-Sedan-4-Door-6-7L-/160963881794?pt=US_Cars_Trucks&hash=item257a31eb42” target=”_blank”>http://cgi.ebay.com/ebaymotors/1989-Bentley-Turbo-R-Base-Sedan-4-Door-6-7L-/160963881794?pt=US_Cars_Trucks&hash=item257a31eb42

    Reply
    1. dculberson Avatar
      dculberson

      Nail. Head.
      I love these cars, but can't imagine them being more effective at anything than making a Range Rover seem like a low-budget beater. The pricing has gotten seriously tempting on them, and they seem like they have sufficient power to make a reasonable modern daily driver, but I'm sure the first year would wipe you out thoroughly and the following ones would just keep on digging at the hole you're throwing your money into.

      Reply
  22. Jeff Glucker Avatar
    Jeff Glucker

    Any Land Rover (except the Freelander).
    An old Porsche (probably horrible by today's standards)
    An old Mercedes (horribly slow)

    Reply
  23. buzzboy7 Avatar
    buzzboy7

    Not saying it's terrible, but I'd be terrified of owning one.
    <img src="http://oldcarbrochures.org/var/albums/NA/Eagle—AMC-and-Chrysler/1984-AMC/1984-Eagle-Brochure/1984%20AMC%20Eagle-05.jpg?m=1320592993&quot; width="600">

    Reply
    1. seguin Avatar
      seguin

      There was an absolutely perfect low miles four-door for sale in Dallas a couple of months back. I was tempted, but I'd really rather have the SX4.

      Reply
      1. buzzboy7 Avatar
        buzzboy7

        I really like the 5 door but then I saw this one last year and it changed my feelings quite a bit.
        <img src="http://i.imgur.com/odu6gbk.jpg&quot; width="600">

        Reply
    2. Sjalabais Avatar
      Sjalabais

      Hot white walls!

      Reply
    3. KoshNaranek Avatar
      KoshNaranek

      I have actually eaten at that restaurant(Fox and Hound Inn) People raved about it, but I did not think much of it. I guess that is why it is now closed.

      Reply
  24. Hopman Avatar
    Hopman

    I'm amazed that no one has posted the biggest crap import of the 80's… YUGO! As in You-agoing nowhere!
    I'd buy two: One to drive & one to do LeMons with.

    Reply
    1. smalleyxb122 Avatar
      smalleyxb122

      You shouldn’t be too surprised, since the question was about what horrible car we want to own. I will not look down upon you for wanting one (or two), but I’m certainly not surprised that more people don’t.

      Reply
    2. SSurfer321 Avatar
      SSurfer321

      I owned one for 4 hours and it was the best fun I've ever had. We took it to our local dirtbike track and abused it till it died. Bust $150 I've ever spent.

      Reply
      1. mr. mzs zsm msz esq Avatar
        mr. mzs zsm msz esq

        [youtube pvG7vi3bFCY http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pvG7vi3bFCY youtube] Yeehaw SS!!! here's a prize, a song about a Trabi that was eaten by pigs and it's replacement. I am too though surprised there are not more EE cars appearing today, I guess not enough people want them really like smalley conjectures, sad that.

        Reply
  25. engineerd Avatar
    engineerd

    I still would like a Disco II. One from around 2001 or later isn't quite as hellish as the pre-2000 models before Ford took over. Still, I would have no illusions of it being an inexpensive vehicle.
    I want a Ford Cortina in the worst way. In fact, for extra expensiveness, I'll take a Lotus Cortina. Picked up cheap, that Lotus twin cam engine will need to be rebuilt. That's not gonna be cheap, but I don't care.

    Reply
  26. Peter Tanshanomi Avatar
    Peter Tanshanomi

    <img src="http://www.renault.com/fr/passionsport/images_without_moderation/magazine/coupés story/floride-zoom.jpg" width="512">
    Renault Floride Coupe. Big time horrible, big time want.

    Reply
    1. longrooffan Avatar
      longrooffan

      saw a convertible version of one of these at the Rolex24 this past weekend.

      Reply
    2. Vairship Avatar
      Vairship

      So pretty!

      Reply
  27. Peter Tanshanomi Avatar
    Peter Tanshanomi

    DO WANT.
    <img src="http://encarsglobe.com/data_images/models/suzuki-x-90/suzuki-x-90-08.jpg"&gt;

    Reply
    1. pj134 Avatar
      pj134

      PREACH!
      <img src="http://www.rocky-road.com/media/x90-4.JPG&quot; width=500>

      Reply
  28. Peter Tanshanomi Avatar
    Peter Tanshanomi

    Is this one "horrible?" I haven't decided which side of the line it falls…but it's borderline either way.
    <img src="http://www.car-list.com/newcars/2007/image//2007_saturn_sky_roadster_rear.jpg"&gt;

    Reply
    1. pj134 Avatar
      pj134

      Redlines are really fun cars. Just don't use a floor jack.

      Reply
  29. Jeb Hoge Avatar
    Jeb Hoge

    A Porsche 928S4 or a Jaguar XJS. I mean, I know they're going to be horrible to maintain, but there's a part of me that just feels like "If only I had the chance to try to CHANGE it, I know I could make it work!" Which is an awful reason to establish a relationship.

    Reply
    1. Peter Tanshanomi Avatar
      Peter Tanshanomi

      Another plug for our fantasy GM 6.5L diesel XJS motor swap.

      Reply
  30. racer139 Avatar
    racer139

    Lately after watching the singer porshe video I want an old 911. This question is always revolving in my head. Ive been thinking about a early to mid eighties rover 3500, or course withs some sort of ls 5 speed swap and a complete rewire using an isis intelligent multiplex electrical system. Also I would give a kidney for a nice alfa romeo gtv…..in that metallic green color. There are tons of other crazy cars floating around in my head all of the time. If only my bank account could handle my heads urges i'd be all set.

    Reply
  31. don fehlio Avatar
    don fehlio

    I'm pretty sure my next car will be a VR6 Jetta.

    Reply
  32. mdharrell Avatar
    mdharrell

    Count me out. I've only ever been interested in wonderful cars.

    Reply
    1. mr. mzs zsm msz esq Avatar
      mr. mzs zsm msz esq

      Does what you have been interested in and what follows you home differ regarding today's question? Personally SD1 is wonderful car surely, about the best from the list of the best cars ever (that I can afford).

      Reply
      1. mdharrell Avatar
        mdharrell

        I've said no to some wonderful cars but never yes to a horrible one.

        Reply
    2. Peter Tanshanomi Avatar
      Peter Tanshanomi

      And there, boys and girls, is a demonstration of what starter fluid does to your brain. Scary, isn't it?

      Reply
      1. mdharrell Avatar
        mdharrell

        Arguably still better than what it does to two-strokes.

        Reply
  33. pj134 Avatar
    pj134

    Lancia Deltas and Innocentis
    Snug Silver Shadows and fugly Lagondas
    Brown E65 wagons free of all bling
    These are a few of my favorite things
    Dreams of Jaguars and crunched S13s
    Datsuns and Broughams and Jeeps with big diesels
    A Dodge Caravan with stock turbocharging
    These are a few of my favorite things
    E30s on white wheels with M colored stripes
    Alfa Romeos that sit just corroding
    Silver white Citroens sans any springs
    These are a few of my favorite things
    When bored commuting
    When the beige hits
    When I'm feeling sad
    I simply remember my favorite things
    And then I don't feel so bad

    Reply
  34. LBJ's Love Child Avatar
    LBJ's Love Child

    <img src="http://good-wallpapers.com/pictures/10704/Amphicar%20770%20Convertible%201968.jpg&quot; width="600">
    Ever since I saw a new one drive down a boat ramp and into water (with folks on the shore screaming warnings), I've wanted an Amphicar.
    Horrible? They leak. Badly.

    Reply
    1. RahRahRecords Avatar
      RahRahRecords

      <img src="http://www.amphicar.com/images/finzilla/Finzilla%207-2-12-3.jpg"&gt;
      They look even cooler with a Stude nose and 58 Chevy trim

      Reply
      1. OA5599 Avatar
        OA5599

        I used to work with someone who owned one (though it probably hadn't left his garage for a decade before we worked together) and have an out-of-town friend whose dad had one for a while. They both told me one of the big problems with keeping them watertight is the steel body. An owner would get into a fender bender at the supermarket and either leave the minor dent unrepaired or go to a bodyshop that would use autobody repair methods of the non-marine variety. Eventually the damaged area would rust through and your car would take on water.
        The fiberglass body kit shown in the picture might actually help the car to be a better boat.

        Reply
  35. mr. Smee Avatar
    mr. Smee

    '73 Pontiac Grand-Am 455, the least horribleof the "collonades."

    Reply
    1. BlackIce_GTS Avatar
      BlackIce_GTS

      I respectfully disagree, this is measurably less horrible:
      <img src="http://carphotos.cardomain.com/ride_images/3/2886/3104/32214051808_large.jpg"&gt;
      Does that mean you win the question though?

      Reply
      1. Peter Tanshanomi Avatar
        Peter Tanshanomi

        I'd also submit this one.
        <img src="http://image.highperformancepontiac.com/f/features/hppp_1008_1977_pontiac_can_am/29211010+pheader_460x1000/hppp_1008_01+1977_pontiac_can_am+.jpg"&gt;

        Reply
  36. Devin Avatar
    Devin

    Found another one:
    <img src="http://www.classicandperformancecar.com/front_website/octane_interact/modelpicture.php?id=3759&quot; width="500">
    It's hilarious and terrible and you're not quite sure if they were joking or not.

    Reply
    1. mr. mzs zsm msz esq Avatar
      mr. mzs zsm msz esq

      No, not horrible car! I can't believe this was the only response that made me feel this way. I do like the looks of the Princess better though. The hub caps on this one…

      Reply
  37. JayP2112 Avatar
    JayP2112

    1st Gen Vue Redline. Had a Honda V6 and AWD. Pretty stout for the time. The interior plastics made my Ranger look like a Bentley.
    <img src="https://encrypted-tbn3.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcSFQj7mmZ76l9YETVPy1pOyhQcYuTjqu2RwsccN5ONBXcSl5M0X"&gt;
    Same notion:
    <img src="http://www.blogcdn.com/www.autoblog.com/media/2008/12/gmc_typhoon.jpg&quot; width="600">

    Reply
    1. OA5599 Avatar
      OA5599

      Except for the seats, console, and a few other odds and ends,Typhoon interior looks cheap because it came from the parts bins of otherGM vehicles, most of which had low MSRPs. At least when you need a new radio surround or A-pillar trim, it's easy enough to find and reasonably priced.
      Exterior cladding is an entirely different story. The tooling disappeared shortly after the last Typhoons were built, so any pieces you find have been drying out for two decades and are extremely brittle. Supply and demand keeps the prices up, particularly the parts most vulnerable in a crash.

      Reply
      1. Alff Avatar
        Alff

        There's a guy at work whose Typhoon's body appears to be rust held together by cladding. I'm guessing those parts will be on the market before long.

        Reply
        1. OA5599 Avatar
          OA5599

          If the prices are reasonable, I'm in the market for a front bumper that's in significantly better condition than the one I have and a solid piece of left fender cladding.

          Reply
          1. Alff Avatar
            Alff

            That would be a difficult conversation to have in the parking garage … "Hi, Stranger. I really like your rusty Typhoon daily driver. Any plans to part it out?"

          2. OA5599 Avatar
            OA5599

            Actually, I got my Typhoon from a guy at work, who bought his vehicle after admiring my Syclone from afar (we ended up trading later).
            Worst case is the guy says no, but more likely you will end up with a new car buddy.

      2. JayP2112 Avatar
        JayP2112

        Of the 3 or 4 recent SyTys I've seen in the last 5 year, all were in a state of hell. I want one but not one of those.
        I'd bet any low mileage trucks would be in GNX price range.

        Reply
        1. OA5599 Avatar
          OA5599

          Higher mileage is OK if the truck is more or less stock. A truck with a lot of mods is very likely to have been pushed past design parameters, and unfortunately that describes most of the ones that haven't spent the last 20 years coocooned in a garage with the other 30 cars in the owner's collection.

          Reply
    2. pj134 Avatar
      pj134

      Just thought I'd add that any Vue V6 before the redesign but after the facelift had the pilot motor.

      Reply
      1. Tim Odell Avatar
        Tim Odell

        …weird.
        Never knew the Honda motor connection there.

        Reply
        1. JayP2112 Avatar
          JayP2112

          That was back when the Japanese V6's were making 250hp while the domestics were boat anchors.
          The engine was the Honda J35A3 V6.

          Reply
          1. pj134 Avatar
            pj134

            Which is funny, because shortly after Saturn used that V6, GM came out swinging with the "High Feature Engine" in just about everything and that motor is fantastic. Great torque and power, just keeps getting better with direct injection and everything else they're putting on it. Word on the street is there will be a twin turbo version of it coming to an ATS platformed Buick whose name I think you can guess.

        2. pj134 Avatar
          pj134

          It's a good engine, the torque converters they used are shitty though. Although the plastics are igloo quality, it's a pretty nice car.

          Reply
  38. C³-Cool Cadillac Cat Avatar
    C³-Cool Cadillac Cat

    I've looked, in the past few years, for one of these….
    <img src="http://oldcarbrochures.org/var/albums/NA/Chrysler_and_Imperial/1981_Chrysler/1981_Imperial_FS_Folder/1981 Imperial-Sinatra-02-03.jpg?m=1305500953" width="600">
    /hangshead
    I mention this one, because the Bentley Turbo R, Lagonda, 928S4, and Eagle have already been spoken for.
    I have a problem…that much is clear.

    Reply
    1. Devin Avatar
      Devin

      At least you've gone with the correct model, the Sinatra edition. So you've got discerning taste.

      Reply
      1. C³-Cool Cadillac Cat Avatar
        C³-Cool Cadillac Cat

        Hey, if I'm gonna have long-term PCH, I'm gonna do it in style!

        Reply
        1. OA5599 Avatar
          OA5599

          The problems with the factory fuel injection are legendary, but most of these cars were retrofit with a carb while under warranty, and even if that hasn't been done yet, LA v8 parts are still pretty plentiful and junkyard-available. It doesn't take voodoo and blood sacrifices to keep a 318 alive. If you label this one as a PCH, you need to keep it original or it doesn't count.

          Reply
          1. C³-Cool Cadillac Cat Avatar
            C³-Cool Cadillac Cat

            If it still had the horrendous FI system, I'd have to keep it that way…in good conscious.
            Well, that…or stuff a 383 under that bonnet.

          2. OA5599 Avatar
            OA5599

            Might as well take advantage of the extra cubes a 400 offers. Externally, it's pretty much the same as a 383, but extra displacement comes in handy for making power.

    2. Alff Avatar
      Alff

      I actually saw one on the road last week. It made me think of Sinatra.

      Reply
    3. Mad_Hungarian Avatar
      Mad_Hungarian

      C3, how serious are you, I know someone in the Charlotte NC area with one who might want to sell.

      Reply
      1. C³-Cool Cadillac Cat Avatar
        C³-Cool Cadillac Cat

        Not serious enough to do it…at least not before a few other ones.
        Thanks for the thought, though.

        Reply
  39. C³-Cool Cadillac Cat Avatar
    C³-Cool Cadillac Cat

    Oh, yeah…and this:
    <img src="http://www.carandclassic.co.uk/uploads/cars/jaguar/1373609.jpg&quot; width="400">
    It's SO pretty!

    Reply
  40. rpdred6 Avatar
    rpdred6

    Smart ForTwo Brabus, Pontiac Aztek, Chevy Corvair, Ford Edsel to name a few of the many
    and…
    BOOM…
    Geo Storm! I used to love those things when I was younger

    Reply
  41. Sjalabais Avatar
    Sjalabais

    I am mostly into squarish Volvos and I lack the self-insight to see anything horrible in that. Yet I'd love a Soviet toy from my youth. Parading around in a GAZ 24:
    <img src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-HvBwsppvNK4/TZGWTbhTLiI/AAAAAAAAN5E/YvoO-MZlxpc/s1600/gaz24.jpg&quot; width="600">
    … doing my firewood with a handy 4×4 UAZ 2206 or similar:
    <img src="https://encrypted-tbn2.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcR4bJTy-YOu3EXuoheisplWHthmDnXcIyjGjX5Y5WVbHkdvzsO-2A&quot; width="600">
    Since these are nr 2 and 3 on my bucket list, after the neutral Swedish brick, I'd have to balance it all out politically with a mid-60s Lincoln Continental.
    <img src="https://encrypted-tbn3.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcTWEfdnlcWxS_QcLio4RqsSL2Vq4DMsRvE27mgtleNjwVGkllIjIQ&quot; width="600">
    Oooh, what a horrible dream garage that would be!

    Reply
    1. C³-Cool Cadillac Cat Avatar
      C³-Cool Cadillac Cat

      A very good friend had a '67 Conti, 'vert, and after he saw the mess it was, underneath, he couldn't wait to be rid of it.
      It'd been in the family since new, however, it was also used to launch boats…into salt water.

      Reply
      1. Sjalabais Avatar
        Sjalabais

        How awful to do that to a car that was born with such style and grace. Where is the justice system when you need it?

        Reply
    2. Number_Six Avatar
      Number_Six

      *waves back at cute Russian woman*

      Reply
      1. mr. mzs zsm msz esq Avatar
        mr. mzs zsm msz esq

        <img src="http://t1.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcQeq0uyu0J1hiOP6MQuYOiL5bbF0eyOi1ddr7gKpH7ggRS2Znq5LvVVfw0"&gt;

        Reply
    3. Peter Tanshanomi Avatar
      Peter Tanshanomi

      GAZ? Nah, that's not horrible. Go for a ZAZ-966.
      <img src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_leoGYAeiH44/TUYE9izNJ6I/AAAAAAAAMpA/Arp13Sr9Dw4/s1600/putin_with_his_1972_zaporozhets.jpg&quot; width="512">

      Reply
      1. Sjalabais Avatar
        Sjalabais

        You jumped over horribler and went right to horriblest. I am amazest.

        Reply
    4. Buickboy92 Avatar
      Buickboy92

      You're in luck with that GAZ 24. Although this is a Volga M24(Same car almost). It's awesome! Price is $11,550.
      http://cooleurocars.com/1986-volga-m24/

      Reply
      1. Sjalabais Avatar
        Sjalabais

        That's quite the specimen, thanks for the link! But I happen to live in Norway, and I'd buy a decent, newly inspected car from Germany, Latvia or Hungary for currently 4-6000€ if I had the money. Yet I am in the fix-up-the-house-and-feed-the-kids-phase of life, so horrible cars will have to wait.

        Reply
  42. Kenwood Avatar
    Kenwood

    I'll take a Chevy Aveo. I'd love to have a little crap-wagon to buzz around in the city with and not care about door dings, shopping carts, etc.
    [youtube NPbfhXsVSUg http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NPbfhXsVSUg youtube]

    Reply
    1. Peter Tanshanomi Avatar
      Peter Tanshanomi

      As I've said before in these comments, I've got a thing for the Pontiac G3, just because it's such a weird, tiny footnote in automotive history. It's not a love thing, more of a "can't leave it alone" thing, like a mental scab I can't stop picking at.

      Reply
      1. vroomsocko Avatar
        vroomsocko

        I have a similar affliction for the Pontiac T-1000.

        Reply
  43. Fritzo2162 Avatar
    Fritzo2162

    I've always been mesmerized by the look of the Opel GT, but they're giant piles of rusty crap both mechanically and structurally.
    Still…those lines!
    <img src="http://www.motorstown.com/images/opel-gt-1100-02.jpg"&gt;

    Reply
    1. Peter Tanshanomi Avatar
      Peter Tanshanomi

      Does the Manta A get an honorable mention?
      <img src="http://librapix.com.s3.amazonaws.com/classic-and-vintage-cars.com/1984.jpg&quot; width="512">

      Reply
      1. pj134 Avatar
        pj134

        So pretty.

        Reply
      2. rusty Avatar
        rusty

        No – not as horrible as the GT – the Manta did not share the kadett's crappy underpinnings like the GT did.

        Reply
    2. Nutzforautos Avatar
      Nutzforautos

      I'll say it for whathisname: "It's all about the stance."

      Reply
  44. needthatcar Avatar
    needthatcar

    I actually bought mine. It's a 1980 Plymouth Arrow Sport pickup. I've had it for a year and I still haven't got it running. They have weak heads on the 2.6 g54b. I have finally decided to "downgrade" from a non-running 2.6 to a running 2.0.
    It's in such great shape though….love it.

    Reply
  45. Martynas Avatar
    Martynas

    <img src="http://i48.tinypic.com/2m3slmq.jpg&quot; width="500">
    Even after 15 years since it first came out, I still can't stop lusting over it. Where I live, these are extremely affordable now, however the horror stories of one's ownership still sort of sobers me up now and then. I know that 156's are not as terrible as older Alfas nor as appreciated between ol' skool alfisti, but it still requires some bravery (or stupidity) to shell your cash for one, especially 'round here. That said, i'll get mine in "azzurro nuvola", pictured above.

    Reply
  46. jeepjeff Avatar
    jeepjeff

    Sometimes, when I'm alone, I'll search Craigslist for Eagle Talons:
    <img src="http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/3/36/Eagle_Talon_TSi_2G.jpg/800px-Eagle_Talon_TSi_2G.jpg&quot; width=500>
    Then, I'll look for Plymouth Dusters and AMC Pacers and Gremlins. The Talon is the one I'm most "ashamed" of. I'm probably never going to own one, though.

    Reply
    1. P161911 Avatar
      P161911

      You do know they made a Plymouth Laser with AWD and a turbo?

      Reply
      1. jeepjeff Avatar
        jeepjeff

        I know. But the Laser was only produced for the first generation of the Talon/Eclipse/Laser badge engineer, and I like the second gen body style better* (and the Eagle still gets me a dead marque). But turbo AWD is definitely the most desirable version (of either generation).
        * Seriously: just a matter of taste. I'm a child of the 90s, and I just like the melted soap body style better than the wedge-mobile. The second gen looks "new" to me, because it was new when I was in high school…

        Reply
        1. pj134 Avatar
          pj134

          I've always loved the design. Just never been a fan of the blowuppiness.

          Reply
          1. jeepjeff Avatar
            jeepjeff

            If I ever get one, there will be Walking The Crank jokes. Oh yes.

  47. Vega Avatar
    Vega

    <img src="http://www.classicandperformancecar.com/front_website/octane_interact/modelpicture.php?id=3474&quot; width="600">
    Rust from the factory and a steering pump that is connected to the cambelt (thus risking a nuked engine when turning the wheel standing still). What's not to like?

    Reply
    1. mr. mzs zsm msz esq Avatar
      mr. mzs zsm msz esq

      But oh man that engine! Great selection, I hope you get your wish!

      Reply
    2. Peter Tanshanomi Avatar
      Peter Tanshanomi

      Yes, but I get tingly in my manbits looking at it.

      Reply
    3. Marto Avatar
      Marto

      Was ist das?

      Reply
      1. sporty88au Avatar
        sporty88au

        Lancia Gamma coupe

        Reply
  48. Vavon Avatar
    Vavon

    A Renault 5 Turbo 2.: Horrible, because I would be trading with the Devil!
    <img src="http://img2.motor-klassik.de/Renault-5-Turbo-im-Flug-19-fotoshowImageNew-a36a7cae-375666.jpg&quot; width="650/">
    Devil: So you want an R5 Turbo 2?
    Vavon: Yes.
    Devil: It will cost you a lot…
    Vavon: How much?
    Devil: 30.000 to 40.000 EUR for starters.
    Vavon: I can handle that…
    Devil: Several turbos and suspension bits…
    Vavon: Uhuh…
    Devil: Copious amounts of petrol…
    Vavon: Okay.
    Devil: Numerous fines, your drivers license and your life!
    Vavon: Sounds like a good deal…
    Thank God I don't have the money to get one!

    Reply
    1. mr. mzs zsm msz esq Avatar
      mr. mzs zsm msz esq

      Be cautious of deals with the Devil. The death may not come swiftly, it'd be a no brainer if that was guaranteed though.

      Reply
    2. Tim Odell Avatar
      Tim Odell

      You need to talk to a friend of mine…
      <img src="http://farm4.staticflickr.com/3652/3761087152_f6a9d05298_z.jpg&quot; width="640" height="428" alt="DSC_0007">
      (click through)

      Reply
      1. Vavon Avatar
        Vavon

        OH GOD! R5 Turbo's, Renault Sport Spider, BMW 2002 Turbo and even a 205 GTI… in CALIFORNIA!!!

        Reply
  49. Tomsk Avatar
    Tomsk

    Basically a homegrown Integra Type R, minus the hatchback utility, and Honda/Acura quality, reliability, and overarching sense of giving a bleep.
    <img src="http://www.markviiclassiccars.com/images/vehicles/91OLDCUT1361.JPG&quot; />

    Reply
    1. PotbellyJoe Avatar
      PotbellyJoe

      Agreed. Wonderful to drive too. Very noisy, but who cares? Take it straight to anywhere worth autocrossing.

      Reply
    2. P161911 Avatar
      P161911

      Make sure you get the W-41 model.
      I like the later Achevia SCX models too:
      <img src="http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/7/7c/1992_Oldsmobile_SCX_W41.jpg"width=500&gt;

      Reply
    3. Peter Tanshanomi Avatar
      Peter Tanshanomi

      And that adds up to horrible for you? Man, have you got screwed up priorities.

      Reply
    4. vroomsocko Avatar
      vroomsocko

      Yes! Quad4 is always a wonderfully terrible idea. My sister had an '88 Olds Calais with a Quad4 and it was a hoot when it was running.

      Reply
  50. mallthus Avatar
    mallthus

    For me, it's the AMC Matador. So many curves. So much malaise.
    <img src="http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/5/52/1976_AMC_Matador_coupe_cocoa_fl-fl.jpg&quot; width=600>

    Reply
    1. Peter Tanshanomi Avatar
      Peter Tanshanomi

      Yes, yes, YES. But your example needs more stripe, less vinyl.
      <img src="http://farm9.staticflickr.com/8164/7248119894_112302d6a0_z.jpg&quot; width="500">

      Reply
    2. RahRahRecords Avatar
      RahRahRecords

      My grand dad had one of these. I've always had a soft spot for them. Good choice!

      Reply
  51. marmer01 Avatar
    marmer01

    Most of mine have already been posted: Eagle Wagon, Jeep Grand Wagoneer, Saab 5000, first-gen SHO, first-gen BMW 750, first-gen XJS convertible, most Colonnades. And maybe a Fiat 124 Spider.

    Reply
  52. pbryantr Avatar
    pbryantr

    Early Chevette.

    Reply
  53. mr. mzs zsm msz esq Avatar
    mr. mzs zsm msz esq

    <img src="http://www.automobile-sportive.com/guide/monica/560/560-ouverture.jpg"&gt; Here's the thing I really want an SD1, I want to make it clear, maybe I did not well enough above. It is a glorious car surely, cannot be an answer for today. So it leaves the worst greatest car that will never happen due to practical things like income and the worst greatest that I may actually buy. For category one I have the Monica 560. This category changes a lot for me, I only first heard of this car thanks to a comment on this site maybe two weeks back. Since then it's been in my thoughts everyday, like many other dream cars before. But I may someday own a Matra. Which sort, Bagheera, Murena, no matter both are surprisingly within reach price-wise. I prefer the earlier ones based on interior, but really any either will do. My FiL is even somewhat on board to help me in my hunt! And here's the greatest thing, this morning my youngest was zoned-out during breakfast. My wife asked what he was dreaming about. "That dad will sell both his cars and buy a sports car." On the walk to school I tried to convince him that Dale the S90 is a sports car, like a 4-door 'vette, gets better (worse) gas mileage than the snake car (Viper) but all the way he did not come around. He may be right, he may convince me. These do look freaking great, damn! <img src="http://www.automobile-sportive.com/guide/matra/bagheera/bagherra_pub.jpg&quot; width="500">

    Reply
  54. wisc47 Avatar
    wisc47

    I know that this…
    <img src="http://www.international-auto.com/images/originals/Scorpion_Ipic2.jpg"&gt;
    …will turn into this…
    <img src="http://us.123rf.com/400wm/400/400/gemenacom/gemenacom0906/gemenacom090600157/5011825-rusty-metal-garbage.jpg"&gt;
    …at the first sight of rain, but I just don't care. I want it.

    Reply
    1. Fritzo2162 Avatar
      Fritzo2162

      Man that thing is sexy. Reminds me of a DeLorean 😀

      Reply
  55. Target29 Avatar
    Target29

    BMW Z8
    <img src="https://encrypted-tbn3.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcQ8m1m9T0vwo6KXqDy0tZ5G2eI5C5ydvD4um7ucksKKAz0SImYT&quot; width="600">
    Brilliant design, but most frames are questionable.
    Either way, like $kacog with a Ford GT or muthalovin' with an NSX this is one car I still want.

    Reply
    1. nutzforautos Avatar
      nutzforautos

      I had the misfortune to drive one of these..once. The first car where I actually felt like I was sitting ON it, rather than IN it.

      Reply
  56. name_too_long Avatar
    name_too_long

    Every SUV I'd consider qualifies for this; Land Rover Series or Defender, Hummer H1, LM002, V10 TDI Toureg; while G-wagons aren't in the same class of horrible, I'm sure the maintenance costs would be ruinous.

    Reply
  57. Slow_Joe_Crow Avatar
    Slow_Joe_Crow

    In the realistic short term, a Land Rover Discovery and a VW Vanagon, in the dream term, a Citroen SM. Great vehicles when they work, but maintenance horrors.

    Reply
  58. Alcology Avatar
    Alcology

    I spent a good amount of time yesterday playing this game. Dreaming of a summer convertible!
    It won't embed, but http://www.dustyoldcars.com/1968-Chrysler-Newport…
    I checked for a lot of convertibles. Found a nice cougar as well http://boston.craigslist.org/bmw/cto/3570336999.h…
    minus that hood.
    I found some sprites and a nice fiat as well.
    I already own an AMC Eagle wagon so I'm living the dream! And why yes, it's not running at the moment.

    Reply
  59. Tim Odell Avatar
    Tim Odell

    Pinto.
    Cruising.
    Wagon.
    <img src="http://www.curbsideclassic.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/02/pinto_cruisesilver-1978.jpg-courtesy-loevofords.org_.jpg"&gt; http://www.curbsideclassic.com/curbside-classics-…

    Reply
    1. pj134 Avatar
      pj134

      It needs some big all terrains (at minimum) though.

      Reply
    2. jeepjeff Avatar
      jeepjeff

      I cannot see anything wrong with this idea.

      Reply
      1. Peter Tanshanomi Avatar
        Peter Tanshanomi

        Well of COURSE not! Because it's a GREAT idea!

        Reply
    3. vroomsocko Avatar
      vroomsocko

      Glorious!

      Reply
  60. Peter Tanshanomi Avatar
    Peter Tanshanomi

    There's horrible, and there's horrible.
    <img src="http://i.ebayimg.com/00/s/MTIwMFgxNjAw/$(KGrHqF,!o8FBkd2ctLCBQrtb7pfGQ~~60_1.JPG">
    Still want. 'Cause, like, it wouldn't take much…

    Reply
  61. engineerd Avatar
    engineerd

    The more I think about it, most of the cars on my desirable list are pretty horrible. I mean, I'd love one of these:
    <img width=500 src="http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/9/98/Jaguar_XJS_3%2C6.JPG"&gt;
    and one of these:
    <img width=500 src="http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/4/44/BMW_840_Ci_Sport_front.jpg"&gt;
    Just maybe not at the same time.

    Reply
    1. Vairship Avatar
      Vairship

      But… if you owned both at the same time, you'd be able to drive to work at least once a week!
      Sure, it'd cost you $3,000 each time, but…

      Reply
  62. Peter Tanshanomi Avatar
    Peter Tanshanomi

    I had no idea how many horrible cars I really want…until today.
    <img src="http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/5/54/Fiat_128_Kent_UK.JPG/280px-Fiat_128_Kent_UK.JPG"&gt;

    Reply
  63. Rust-MyEnemy Avatar
    Rust-MyEnemy

    I'd quite like a Ford Probe.
    Tell me everything's going to be alright?

    Reply
    1. Vavon Avatar
      Vavon

      <img src="http://iheartinspiration.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/everything-alright.jpg"&gt;

      Reply
    2. Peter Tanshanomi Avatar
      Peter Tanshanomi

      You're British, so you have an excuse.

      Reply
  64. sohc Avatar
    sohc

    ford escape to so I can still go fishing while I tear into the bronco II and save a few bucks in fuel doing it.

    Reply
  65. Mad_Hungarian Avatar
    Mad_Hungarian

    OK, did we really get this far without anyone mentioning a Dauphine? I saw a Floride but not its sedan sibling. I know how bad these are. My dad had one when I was a kid. I still think they are cute as a button: <img src="http://www.renault.com/fr/vehicules/hier/Images_Without_Moderation/Dauphine/dauphine-2.jpg">Either than or a '58 Packard:<img src="http://www.badgoat.net/CRH_homepage/Penquis/Penquis_03_05.jpg"&gt;

    Reply
    1. Peter Tanshanomi Avatar
      Peter Tanshanomi

      I have my standards, and have to draw the line somewhere. And it's just THIS side of the '58 Packard.

      Reply
      1. Vairship Avatar
        Vairship

        Clearly you haven't considered the wagon version….
        <img src="http://hooniverse.info/wp-content/uploads/2011/10/1958-Packard-Station-Wagon-for-sale-Classic-car-ad-from-CollectionCar.com_.-Google-Chrome-10242011-122328-PM.bmp.jpg&quot; width="600"> <a href="http://hooniverse.info/2011/10/26/hooniverse-wagon-wednesday-a-rare-1958-packard-station-wagon/” target=”_blank”>http://hooniverse.info/2011/10/26/hooniverse-wagon-wednesday-a-rare-1958-packard-station-wagon/

        Reply
  66. seguin Avatar
    seguin

    <img src="http://trialx.com/curetalk/wp-content/blogs.dir/7/files/2011/06/cars/1992_Dodge_Spirit-2.jpg&quot; alt="kaboom!">
    I already owned one that I want again: the Dodge Spirit R/T. They're like running a 5k with a live grenade…scary fast.

    Reply
  67. joelstrick Avatar
    joelstrick

    Early Fox body Mustang
    <img src="http://www.cstatic-images.com/supersized/DMI/151863/NA.jpg"&gt;
    or Plymouth Prowler
    <img src="http://www.cstatic-images.com/supersized/DMI/26218/D4652/02.jpg"&gt;

    Reply
  68. Bryce Womeldurf Avatar
    Bryce Womeldurf

    The one I just bought last Monday. HA! 1995 Miata that pretty much needs all new fluids and hopefully not a new head gasket. If so, it's a project and that's how it goes. Having fun with it so far despite all of the radiator flushing. Just to clarify, I don't consider Miatas horrible, just the condition of this one, but I had $3k to shop with and I wanted a 1.8 NA, so there was going to be some work involved no matter what.
    <img src="http://farm9.staticflickr.com/8514/8414643538_7123a188a2.jpg"&gt;

    Reply
    1. marmer01 Avatar
      marmer01

      Yes. This. Exactly this. Soon as I can scrape up 3K in change out of the couch cushions and under the car seats, I'll be right there if I can find one within ~the distance for which it will run. I'd prefer a white one, but, a fifteen year old Miata is probably going to need to be painted anyway…

      Reply
      1. Bryce Womeldurf Avatar
        Bryce Womeldurf

        Be patient when you buy. Nothing good ever comes easy. I wish you luck. Me, I'm not so fortunate so far. I've been working on a triple flush of the cooling system. Then the other night I stripped the drain plug. Got a new one yesterday and tonight found out that it was too small. And no one is showing another option for it. After this I get to find out whether the head gasket is blown or not. I'm hoping not but it's starting to look like that.

        Reply
  69. 5keptic Avatar
    5keptic

    suzuki swift GTI
    <img src="http://www.carthrottle.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/SwiftGTi1.jpg&quot; width="600">
    Dodges aspen or a mirada
    <img src="http://encarsglobe.com/data_images/models/dodge-mirada/dodge-mirada-05.jpg&quot; width="600">
    Chevy tracker
    <img src="http://carphotos.cardomain.com/ride_images/3/2570/601/31422800005_large.jpg&quot; width="600">
    i don;t think anyone mentioned any Isuzus
    like a diesel trooper, or the impulse which I have always lusted after since i saw the "tuned by Lotus" writen on it in a junkyard. one of the awd turbo ones would be unbelievable. i am beginning to think they do not exist.

    Reply
    1. Peter Tanshanomi Avatar
      Peter Tanshanomi

      You and I think alike. A LOT alike.

      Reply
    2. faberferrum Avatar
      faberferrum

      There are 2 miradas sitting on a lot 10 minutes from me, just quietly rotting away. And one of them AWD turbo isuzus currently for sale for $1000 nearby. I'm tempted by the isuzu, but must resist….

      Reply
      1. 5keptic Avatar
        5keptic

        don;t tell me where the awd isuzu is. i really should not know for my own good.

        Reply
        1. faberferrum Avatar
          faberferrum

          Is Saskatchewan far enough away?

          Reply
          1. Devin Avatar
            Devin

            Not for me! Though I probably should resist, where on earth is there an AWD Isuzu in this province?

          2. faberferrum Avatar
            faberferrum

            Regina, on the QCMA site: http://www.qcma.org/modules.php?op=modload&na…
            where are you at?

          3. Devin Avatar
            Devin

            Yorkton, so not too far off.

  70. vroomsocko Avatar
    vroomsocko

    1991 Chevy Lumina Z34 5-speed.
    <img src="http://blog.caranddriver.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/08/1991-Chevrolet-Lumina-Z34-interior-626×382.jpg&quot; width="500">
    <img src="http://www.motorstown.com/images/chevrolet-lumina-z34-07.jpg&quot; width="500">

    Reply
  71. I Think Not Avatar
    I Think Not

    I already bought mine, though I didn't know how much I wanted it (nor how horrible it would be) until I got it home, title in hand.
    <img src="https://lh5.googleusercontent.com/-lXdD6Bhmg7M/UPNUc4DOdLI/AAAAAAAADKI/YHctCGDNf1w/s640/P1133275.JPG"&gt;

    Reply
  72. nutzforautos Avatar
    nutzforautos

    "…a fu%king teal Grand Am!"

    Reply