Craigslist Crapshoot

The World’s Worst Car Is For Sale On Craigslist
Welcome to Craigslist Crapshoot, our weekly search for the most bizarre, awesome, and/or terrible vehicles that the online classifieds has to offer. 
Five grand will buy you a lot of car. Hell, it’ll buy you a lot of cars if your tastes aren’t that discriminating. Last week we narrowed down that five-grand price limit to the biggest bang for the buck you could find. We’ll see who’s banging the most in a sec, but first, this week’ quixotic quest.
There’s a threshold in the automotive world that took place about 1985. Cars before then—with a few exceptions—were generally crap. After that year however, cars started to drive and perform more closely to today’s standards. There’s one car that seemed to bridge that gap, and in fact to run counter to the standards of its multiple eras. That car is Porsche’s 928. Seeing as how that car today runs the gamut from un-loved fright pig to connoisseur collector cream puff, it’s an excellent quarry. Let’s see what might be the best deal on a 928 out there. Money is no object.
As always, we want your finds to go down in infamy and not in the site’s spam filter. Since we’ve changed commenting systems, you may need to update your commenter account. Make sure you have a Disqus account – they’re free and easy to get – and then comment away.

Got that? Good, Now, let’s get a ride.


In the context of our usage, “bang” is a euphemism for performance, while buck is a slang term for the standard base unit of American paper currency, the dollar. In that case, bang for the buck means the most performance for the least amount of money.
That was for the newbies. The rest of you obviously knew what it meant because you came up with some fitting contenders that really banged for few bucks. What was perhaps the most revealing was how many non-automotive options were offered. GTXcellent offered a crazy cool Olds 455-powered speed boat (with trailer) as an option, which is just like a car only with bikinis. I see nothing wrong with that equation. Also eschewing four wheels, only this time for two, the ever reliable kiefmo gave us a Suzuki ‘Busa’ under our arbitrary but oh so important price limit. When death arrives, it will be riding a Busa, which will likely kill it.
Citric and smalleyxb122 both wanted us to get on the bus, but the biggest bang in my opinion (and I am the arbitrator here, it’s true) was the 1995 Nissan 200SX located by nanoop and which comes with a Totalpris of 30,000 somethings and offers up more than 300 horsepower, or so it is claimed.
Thanks to you all for spending some imaginary money, and congrats to nanoop for bringing the biggest bang. Now, let’s go Porsche hunting!

spera 90%, dyse 550cc , turbo gt28, luft intake 300zx, rb20det,
spera 90%, dyse 550cc , turbo gt28, luft intake 300zx, rb20det,

 

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  1. Alff Avatar
    Alff

    I’ll admit I don’t follow the market for these but this seems a bit expensive…
    http://www.ebay.com/itm/like/191878835540?item=191878835540&lgeo=1&vectorid=229466&rmvSB=true

    1. Alff Avatar
      Alff

      Bummer. Original listing ended without someone snapping it up for the $119K buy-it-now price.

  2. GTXcellent Avatar
    GTXcellent

    I can’t think of a ‘performance’ car I’d want less than Porsche 928, so I have no idea if $20k is a fair price or not for an ’88 with a 5 speed
    http://images.craigslist.org/01313_7YxYOgITsxl_600x450.jpg
    https://minneapolis.craigslist.org/ram/cto/5570224971.html

  3. I_Borgward Avatar
    I_Borgward

    Hmm… body looks straight. Looks like it’s mostly all there, and… AAAAAGGGH THE INTERIOR
    (what the hell do you want for $2,000, anyway?)
    http://salem.craigslist.org/cto/5599572557.html

    1. I_Borgward Avatar
      I_Borgward

      If you look closely, the wiring harness hanging out of the dash spells out a message:
      “alle Hoffnung aufgeben”

    2. Tiberiuswise Avatar

      1, Part out the engine, tranny and assorted bits.
      2, Install engine and tranny from totaled FWD car into the back.
      3, Go down in LeMons history.

      1. Sean McMillan Avatar
        Sean McMillan

        I see what you did there. It should be put on a vw pan or, drop the whole body backwards onto a fiero

  4. JayP Avatar
    JayP

    1990 Porsche 928S4 * Grand Prix White * Texas 928 * STACKS OF RECORDS – $15995
    Does it come with a bag of coke?
    http://images.craigslist.org/00K0K_gzu10JD3CXU_600x450.jpg
    http://dallas.craigslist.org/dal/ctd/5573727574.html

    1. nanoop Avatar
      nanoop

      White on white wheels, dark red interior – it may be a 1990, but it was clearly ordered in the 80ies.

    2. Cool_Cadillac_Cat Avatar
      Cool_Cadillac_Cat

      Damn it.
      I posted that on a G+ group just the other day, ’cause I’ve always wanted one (but NOT this one), and it’s local.
      Super crack pipe!

  5. engineerd Avatar
    engineerd

    There are 2 for sale here in the greater Detroit area. One downriver (read: not a rich part of town) with high miles and an auto tranny for under $10k that needs some work. Then there’s this one. It’s in Oakland County (in the top 25 wealthiest counties in the USA), has been maintained, and has a 5-speed. It’s $33,500…or 3x more than the other one. This is definitely a Tale of Two Cities situation.
    http://images.craigslist.org/00j0j_77SDWv3xKs8_600x450.jpg
    http://detroit.craigslist.org/okl/cto/5612587807.html
    (Here’s that other one: http://detroit.craigslist.org/wyn/cto/5594872222.html)

    1. salguod Avatar

      I lived Downriver when I was in the Detroit area. Taylor then Riverview. Liked Riverview, but don’t miss the Detroit area much at all.

      1. engineerd Avatar
        engineerd

        Hey neighbor! I live in Dearborn. I’ve started to get the itch to leave Michigan, but probably won’t for a long time. My wife is too attached to this place.

        1. salguod Avatar

          We spend our first year in Dearborn, on Kendal street near Diversey. That would have been in 1993. We moved to Taylor in 1994, Riverview in 1995 and Columbus in 1996.

          1. cap'n fast Avatar
            cap’n fast

            as time goes by, we find more and more people find ways to escape from the Detroit area. even if they do not make it all the way out of the state of Michigan(which is akin to “zombieland”) the actual escape from Detroit holds a certain cashae for those who have survived the ordeal. it is small wonder that the small yet intrepid group of survivors find each other and we offer condolences for those who unwillingly remained behind that others may escape.

  6. JayP Avatar
    JayP

    In my area… not too bad compared to the previous Tx 928. Needs more pics.
    http://images.craigslist.org/00x0x_cam2fWDYqXr_600x450.jpg
    1989 Porsche 928 S4 – $12000 (Euless)
    http://dallas.craigslist.org/mdf/cto/5576953769.html

    1. Inliner Avatar
      Inliner

      I’d think that it’s slightly overpriced, but manual 928s are more valuable than automatics, which were the vast majority. As such, it’s unusual that the listing focuses on the aftermarket supercharger, and not the rarer manual.

  7. BigRedCaveTroll Avatar
    BigRedCaveTroll

    I’m between lower Alabama and the Pacific Northwest (but not really geographically), so I’ll revert to my hometown (which is where I am geographically) for my Craigslist of choice. I can’t tell if that makes this selection a good price because it’s so clean, or if it’s straight crazy because it’s an old automatic Porsche 928: http://fortwayne.craigslist.org/ctd/5590836968.html
    http://images.craigslist.org/00q0q_l4fkee5Hvkq_600x450.jpg

    1. Inliner Avatar
      Inliner

      I think that the price for 928s is usually in the service history first and foremost, with a secondary emphasis on era (early 80s with low power being the cheapest). That’s why there are valid $5,000 928s and valid $35,000 928s.

  8. mdharrell Avatar

    Somehow, no matter what the Crapshoot topic, I wind up looking at fiberglass-bodied three wheelers. This one even has enclosed sliding doors, much like a Kaiser Darrin:
    http://images.craigslist.org/00404_4KB3Qx0ikrJ_600x450.jpg
    http://seattle.craigslist.org/see/mcy/5606797682.html

    1. Tiberiuswise Avatar

      I presume the rope on the front is to tie it to a hitching post? You know. So it doesn’t wander off.

    2. nanoop Avatar
      nanoop

      I’m still amazed that they managed to put in a V8 with transaxle in there.

      1. Rich Cabesa Avatar
        Rich Cabesa

        I’ll see your Tular(?) and raise you one Midget
        This is actually a “Tri-Pacer” http://www.classicautonetwork.com/search_results_details.aspx?type=cnt&aid=427
        http://losangeles.craigslist.org/wst/cto/5609855570.html
        Cute N-600 ‘Roadster” in the back ground

  9. nanoop Avatar
    nanoop

    Thanks for the election, I feel very hooniworth now (although this will never heal the pain caused by the fact that I never reached level 100 in IntenseDebate. ..)
    The coolest 928 deal here is the very car that was tested by the Swedish car mag in 1978. Complete history, great colors, only 250000 somethings that’s 30,000 dollars and some sixpence.
    https://finncdn.global.ssl.fastly.net/dynamic/1600w/2016/4/vertical-3/29/9/750/831/19_2063485326.jpg
    http://m.finn.no/car/used/ad.html?finnkode=75083119

    1. dukeisduke Avatar
      dukeisduke

      Looks like the color they called, “Petrol Blue”.

  10. irishzombieman Avatar
    irishzombieman

    Sorry. First post in a long time and it’s not a 928. But this guy was selling a race car chassis which got me to look for his other listings and whadya know?
    He’s selling ROCKET REFUELING SUITS.

    View post on imgur.com


    wantwantwantwaNTWANTWANT
    https://goldcountry.craigslist.org/clt/5560472708.html

    1. smalleyxb122 Avatar
      smalleyxb122

      If I’m refueling rockets, I don’t want my suit to arrive in what looks a bit too much like a casket.

      1. nanoop Avatar
        nanoop

        If I’m wearing a suit, I don’t want it to look like I just refuelled a rocket.

        1. mdharrell Avatar

          It suits me just fine.

          1. irishzombieman Avatar
            irishzombieman

            Hey, is that you? You need one of these suits. And a glass bubble helmet.
            I grew up near here. One of my favorite places on the planet.

          2. mdharrell Avatar

            Yeah, that’s me. I do need one of those suits and maybe a different hat.

    2. Batshitbox Avatar
      Batshitbox

      As long as we’re off-topic… that a-ha banner advertisement immediately got Mary Ellen Makes The Moment Count stuck in my head.
      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rf7hBKI2_UI

    3. Vairship Avatar
      Vairship

      Welcome back! Also, those suits might come in handy in case that used 928 decides to combust spontaneously…

  11. 0A5599 Avatar
    0A5599

    Around Y2K I had an opportunity for a cleaner one for free, but needing $5k in transmission work. Before I made up my mind, a guy I know snagged it, made it self-propelled, and then a month later it suffered some other costly setback.
    I think $200 is a good walk-away price for this one.
    http://allentown.craigslist.org/pts/5579496620.html
    http://images.craigslist.org/00C0C_a4DDyA4hn7O_600x450.jpg

    1. Vairship Avatar
      Vairship

      Ran away when parked?

  12. salguod Avatar

    I was just looking at this one the other day. Genuinely sounds like a well loved car that the guy simply ran out of time or money to care for. Poor pics, but it’s an S4 5 speed and $4,500.
    http://columbus.craigslist.org/cto/5611101821.html
    http://images.craigslist.org/01616_lUicdNA6GMx_600x450.jpg

    1. smalleyxb122 Avatar
      smalleyxb122

      In this list of outrageously priced or outlandishly decrepit 928s, this one is the only one that is disturbingly tempting. Reasonably affordable, and being a manual S4, worth fixing the heretofore undisclosed problems.

      1. engineerd Avatar
        engineerd

        Agreed x1000

      2. salguod Avatar

        Yeah, I’m thankful I don’t have spare space or cash for this. Thankful and sad, but I suppose mostly thankful.

      3. salguod Avatar

        I’ve done a very foolish thing and emailed for more information.

      4. salguod Avatar

        He’s the son of the original owner, which is cool.
        Car hasn’t run in some time, but he believes that it could.
        It needs a timing belt, water pump, brakes and tires. The timing belt is what’s keeping him from trying to start it.
        Interior panels have been “removed for cleaning” but are all there.
        Numerous exterior trim items need replacing, biggest being the cracked front bumper/spoiler.
        Interior – Cracked dash, shift boot and vents. Driver’s seat looks a bit rough too.
        AC doesn’t work.
        Electrical drain in the sunroof or trunk release circuit.
        Original owner’s family and the honest sounding description makes this attractive. The list of potentially expensive repairs required is a bit frightening and general condition is a bit more rough than it initially seemed. All in all, this seems like a decent project 928, if there can be such a thing. I have no idea if the price is fair or not.
        If I were in a different place in life, with more room and disposable cash, I’d pursue this.

  13. mrh1965 Avatar
    mrh1965

    $14 grand buys this sad interior
    https://philadelphia.craigslist.org/cto/5557269204.html

  14. RHParish Avatar
    RHParish

    Well here’s an electrifying deal if I’ve ever seen one. Get amped up, kids (for $7k):
    http://sfbay.craigslist.org/sby/cto/5571929404.html
    http://evalbum.com/img/736/736d.jpg

    1. JayP Avatar
      JayP

      Shocking.

    2. engineerd Avatar
      engineerd

      Most cars power the headlights themselves. I’ve never seen one where you have to plug the headlights in to charge them up.

  15. Dabidoh_Sambone Avatar
    Dabidoh_Sambone

    The seller states that it has new wipers but omits whether the darn things runs. OTOH at $2700 it isn’t much of a gamble considering that junkyards are full of Chebby LS engines pining for a new home …
    http://tampa.craigslist.org/hil/cto/5584717910.html

  16. SlowJoeCrow Avatar
    SlowJoeCrow

    The car I’d like to find is the one my neighbor showed me back in 88-89. At the time our next door neighbor was the service manager at a Porsche dealer so he occasionally brought stuff home home. In this case it was a 928 S trade in whose owner was described as a total druggie. The interior was typical 80s with extra gauges including an hour meter, one of those Blaupunkt radios with the controls on a stalk and either a Clifford or Ungo alarm. The real piece de resistance was the rear bumper, where the embossed Porsche letters had been filled with LEDs.
    The only period lighting job that topped this was the guy at Americade whose Space Shuttle tribute Gold Wing had so many LEDs embedded in it that he had to run a second alternator to power them.

  17. SlowJoeCrow Avatar
    SlowJoeCrow

    Back on topic, this could be either very good, or very bad.
    http://portland.craigslist.org/clc/cto/5606682291.html
    350 Chevy swapped 928 from Oregon City, the most redneck part of the Portland metro area. I give extra points for the IROC-Z style intake that nods towards the original intake manifold’s style.
    http://images.craigslist.org/00l0l_9yjJT2AQVTI_600x450.jpg

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