A Diatribe on the Joys of Peter Fonda-ism


This man really, really hates his Harley. How much does he hate Harleys? you ask. Let’s just say he probably won’t make many friends at Dinosaur Barbeque, that’s for sure.

It would seem that -someone- got thier tailfeathers in a bustle, and had my ad deleted. Here’s the ‘super happy fun-time-socially acceptable’ version. I hope someone chokes on it. And just to be specific? I very carefully read the TOS for Craigslist. It does not violate any of those terms.
I’ll get right to the point. I *CENSORED* hate this tub of *CENSORED* . I wish I’d gotten full coverage, so I could light this *CENSORED* thing on *CENSORED*. I bought it a year ago for 2700. I have since poured another 1,000 into it, along with way too many hours, and not a small amout of my blood, literally. When I first got it, it had a bad coil I found this out when it shorted out… directly into my *CENSORED*. In high speed traffic. That was the -high point- of my relationship with this *CENSORED* thing.
Since the *CENSORED*-forsaken piece of milwaukee sadism failed to kill me then, it has spent the last year making my life a living *CENSORED*. Every single time I’ve taking this half-baked sack of *CENSORED* out of the driveway, it’s made sure to die on the side of the road, usually to the tune of 300-500 bucks. and I usually have to walk home to get the *CENSORED* truck. After a new coil, new clutch, a rebuild of the front rockerbox, re-shimming the cams, wiring repairs, -two- new tail lights, and a new tire, It finally *CENSORED* me off one too many times. After all the love and care I lavished on this miserable *CENSORED*, it….ate the *CENSORED* coil again. Full *CENSORED* Circle. I cant -look- at this thing without wanting to take a *CENSORED* sledgehammer to it. So, I’m selling it. No trades, No payments, only nice, sweet cash to ease the burning pain of having owned this thing.
Now, to be clear, there’s nothing actually wrong with it that I can tell, other than the most recent problem, the coil. Someone out there will most certainly have better luck with it than I. Please, for the love of god, get this thing out of my driveway before I lose what’s left of my mind.
UPDATE: Replaced the coil, tuned it up, run nice. Still hate it. Still selling it. A running bike is worth more than a non-running bike, and I want more money to soothe the pain of having to touch this truly evil, vile, and sadistic thing, wrought from pure hate, and coated in bile. A million would not be enough, but 500$ more is about the most I can expect to get.

He should be in the next Harley ad campaign: “Screw It, Let’s Ride,” pared down to “Screw It.” Or “*CENSORED* It,” for that matter.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y3BmMqvyBdM[/youtube]

1979 HID Sportster – $2500 (Oklahoma City) — Craigslist

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  1. zsm Avatar
    zsm

    I always liked madlibs when I was a kid, this one could be fun.

  2. Black Steelies Avatar

    THE Dinosaur BBQ? Only posers ride in on bikes anyway. Most of the patrons are college kids and squares looking for that raw, bluesy, biker feel…. when I go I get the Texas brisket.

    1. bzr Avatar

      Hey, I was always just there for the food.

      1. Black Steelies Avatar

        I haven't been in awhile but go with friends whenever they come up to visit. Def a place everyone can agree on.

      2. Peter Tanshanomi Avatar
        Peter Tanshanomi

        Upstate NY Barbecue — c'mon…really?

        1. bzr Avatar

          Don't knock it till you've tried it. It's surprisingly good.

  3. dmilligan Avatar
    dmilligan

    Over the years I've known a few guys who rode Harleys, and all of them constantly bitched about how unreliable they were. "Don't ever ride one further than you can afford to have it towed" was an often heard bit of advice. But they all kept fixing them and riding them because they were Harley-Davidsons. I couldn't figure it out.

    1. Sidecar57 Avatar
      Sidecar57

      There is some good news here,he has a truck to load the cursed Harley Ferguson onto when (not if ) it breaks down.Have you ever noticed that when you see a group of HFs going for a ride that there is always an F150 following at a discreet distance? I reckon the bloke at Ford who came up with the F150 Harley Ferguson Edition had a great sense of irony/humor. I have to go now there are some big angry blokes knocking on the front door,best see what they want.

    2. Peter Tanshanomi Avatar
      Peter Tanshanomi

      I adored the BSA B50SS I posted in the Britbike thread. It never ran very long at a stretch either. When it was working, however, it was almost worth it.

  4. MrThayer Avatar
    MrThayer

    My father-in-law has a later model speedster that he rarely rides because it has always had an electrical gremlin that causes it to miss. He continues to insure it and make payments on it. I shake my head in private, though I do hope he teaches me how to ride it before it blows up.

  5. Jim-Bob Avatar
    Jim-Bob

    I never got the whole Harley thing. "it's about freedom, man! it's about the open road, wind in your hair, and…..crap… the stupid thing just broke down in the middle of nowhere…again." Sorry, but if I were to get a bike, it would either be Japanese of a Ural. Why a Ural? I dunno… to me they're just cool and I can't imagine Soviet bikes being any worse than a H-D.

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