Continuing on with the Hooniverse “Art Car” Weekend where I discovered random transportation devices that were turned into rolling artwork, at least according to their creators. This one is from Oregon where the “Art Car” movement seems to be strong (Well next to Burning Man, but that’s a whole different story). I’m not sure why the Northwest Coast attracts these types of vehicular statements, but they do. Here is a 1995 Ford Taurus Wagon that seems to have random crap glued onto its flanks. Take a look and tell me if there is a theme to it…

According to the listing:

How much do you dislike your neighbors? Want to find out? Great! I have the perfect giant glistening pile of CarArt for the job!

The Specs:
1995 Ford Taurus Station Wagon
3.0 V6 (good little engines, won’t eat head gaskets like a 3.8 V6)
Automatic Transmission (has the updates so it won’t explode like earlier years were known for)
Clear Title in my name ( The car will need new plates and tags)
Power Windows
Power Locks
Cruise Control
Airconditioning
CD Player I think Worked
BRAND NEW WINDSHIELD (with like, ten miles on it. I’m still not sure why I paid for that)
Interior is filthy (dirty hippies!)
Exterior is filthy (dirty hippies!)
100 BILLION GLASS BEADS (Yes, I counted. It’s actually 100 billion of em.)
TWO Roof Mounted Bear Heads
Not One, but TWO Awesome Sea Serpents (An A.S.S. for each side!)
Some Sort Of Light Thing…(I think there’s some others under the car I’ve never tried to make work)
A Clear Disregard For Automobile Design Conventions
Pretty Nice Factory Alloy Wheels
Tires That Are Round
Flip Up Third Row Seat (That was actually an expensive option. Take your buddies for a backwards hayride of doom!)

Screamin’ deal! Most of the screaming will be whoever you live with, next to, on the same block as…possibly the county, they scream sometimes….

Free of Charge I’ll also include the bonus of ‘Never Running Out Of People To Talk To’ whenever you stop to get gas or have it parked on the street! This is the same exact model of ‘Never Running Out Of People To Talk To’ you would get with a much more expensive supercar, with the added bonus of being able to park it in a normal spot instead of sideways across four! (Seriously, it’ll probably cause more damage to whoever door dings it than it will to the mighty Dragon Wagon.)

I estimate there’s probably several thousand dollars worth of glass beads, fake diamonds, costume jewelry and glass tiles on the car (no joke, those things are astoundingly expensive)! I’d consider selling just the ‘Art Car’ stuff on the car if someone wanted to repurpose that for their own projects. This is seriously the most Portlandia car you will ever find, and you totally need it!

Oh yeah, this would be IDEAL for Burning Man folks to drag out to burningman. It’d fit right in on the playa. Besides what’s more on theme for a cargo cult than a station wagon, a car built with more car added to haul more cargo where the car goes.

Asking price for the Dragon Wagon is $800, which prices it within the rules of the 24 hours of LeMons, and I bet you the judges would waive the $500 rule just to see this thing run in competition. See the listing here, and tell me what you think of this thing…