Ladies, Gentlemen; thank you for joining me in saying goodbye to a vehicle that has been for many years a forbidden fruit in most every part of the word. Even for those not hampered by random import restrictions, a lack of left-hand-drive options made them unappealing for all but the most dedicated men and women on the market, brave people who laughed in the face of the great Gearhead depreciation paradox. Let us take a moment to say farewell to the Australian ute, who passed away in July 29 of this year at the age of 84.

Well, like with the Panther’s fateful demise in 2011, we once again gather in a Ford plant to see the death of not just a vehicle, but an entire segment of vehicles. The white Falcon XR6 will be spared the indignity of being exported to some random customer and will be kept in a museum so that those who never came to experience one can at least acknowledge its existence and maybe be inspired to have a looksie around the classifieds.

It’s gestation was an unusual one, the product of a single letter from Victoria requesting a solution for a problem that was seemingly ignored or solved adequately by the pickups of the time for anyone else. It’s not like bodystyles were cheap to develop and manufacture even back then were there was precious few in the way of regulation. But even so, after a two year gestation Ford launched the Coupe Utility. It’s sister, the Roadster Utility, came and went too soon for the same reasons Brothers SSR and Dakota convertible left us after a couple of years. In 1951, Holden decided that they too would offer a solution to someone who thought a pickup was unworthy of the parking lot at church.

I must admit that I was not a fan of the ute when I was beginning my induction into all things automotive. I had been conditioned to look at them with distrust by one too many VW Saveiros and Chevrolet Corsa Pickups. Small cars that were neither a pickup nor a sedan? It just seemed wrong. It wasn’t until a blue ambassador by the name HSV Maloo came waltzing in my screen, beating an Audi S4 in a drag race. All of a sudden, they didn’t seem like such a bad idea. A Pontiac G8 that you could use to haul a couple hundred pounds of dirt? Yes, that’s something I can get behind.
 

But like the man who needs something to rely on, I moved in just as all the clever money ran out. Production was already slowing down and leading to where we are today. The ute’s gone, Americans are taking back to mid-size trucks only because they are the size of the full-sized one two generations ago and the chance of someone else creating a segment based on a letter is unlikely. The Ute is survived by the Chevrolet SS, currently stationed in the US, and the few left on the dealerships in its native Australia and specialist imports elsewhere. Peace be to its soul and resignation to the mourning.