Last Call: Someone needs to tell BMW to stop

I’m not sure who at BMW is approving all these design choices but someone needs to put them in a time out. We’ve all seen the new M3/M4 front end so I won’t go too deep on that. But as if we weren’t upset about that they went and gave us this trapezoid exhaust. If your car looks anything like this then I’m sorry but now you can’t look at it from the front or the back. But hey, at least you still have that side profile right? The wing is nice and the wheels we’ve seen before but overall it’s hard to appreciate.

The old front end on the manual M3 wagon would be enough to blow people away but I guess they had to do something polarizing didn’t they? I hope that they listen to the massive amount of feedback that the car community is giving them and make some adjustments for next year. Will they listen? Probably not, so I won’t be holding my breath. Let’s just assume it has a great sound.

Last Call indicates the end of Hooniverse’s broadcast day. It’s meant to be an open forum for anyone and anything. Thread jacking is not only accepted, it’s encouraged.

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19 responses to “Last Call: Someone needs to tell BMW to stop”

  1. Sjalabais Avatar
    Sjalabais

    You have a point there, BMW tries to be polarizing indeed. I think they realized in the Bangle years that controversy sells. It creates a false sense of relevance, and BMW is big enough to keep rolling and selling nonetheless. It’s like those people you meet who say they like cars, and then all they know is that “BMW and Porsche are best”, but they’ve never even heard of one cool car.

  2. Batshitbox Avatar
    Batshitbox

    You think that’s bad? Now they use the “M” designation on their motorcycles, which don’t look good from whichever angle you approach them.
    I give you the BMW M1000RR.
    (If a BMW car is a Bimmer, and a BMW motorcycle is a Beemer, what’s this thing? B-M-W-M-R-R… A BuMWarMeR?

    BMW Digitally Unveils The M 1000 RR

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/f958d101642ae612e767e0c1e3b387399f5558a21f7658e800e6929d3b536d3d.jpg

    1. Tiller188 Avatar
      Tiller188

      Well, yes, probably, but it might be possible to fix that with an uprated radiator.

      1. neight428 Avatar
        neight428

        I was thinking with the conventional exhaust location it was probably not too bad. Those underseat jobs would do the trick though.

    2. 0A5599 Avatar
      0A5599

      The Roman numeral for 1000 is M, so the M version is Eminem.

      https://i.redd.it/qym1m0tb6w041.jpg

    3. outback_ute Avatar
      outback_ute

      Still less weird than the K1?

  3. 0A5599 Avatar
    0A5599

    Hideous from the front, of course. The back could be improved a lot by swapping the right two exhaust outlets with the left two, forming a V instead of a Λ, and then panting the wing and the rear diffuser to be body color.

    But I really like the idea of using wheels from the Bandit Trans Am.

    https://s.aolcdn.com/os/ab/_cms/2020/09/23085252/P90398956_highRes.jpg

    1. outback_ute Avatar
      outback_ute

      Didn’t they learn from the Lexus ISF?

      Oh for the days when BMW design reflected some sort of logic, or form follows function…

      1. roguetoaster Avatar
        roguetoaster

        This is exactly it, form seems to have become the key factor, and manufacturers seem to have forgotten that these are vehicles first and “art” second.

      2. roguetoaster Avatar
        roguetoaster

        This is exactly it, form seems to have become the key factor, and manufacturers seem to have forgotten that these are vehicles first and “art” second.

        1. 0A5599 Avatar
          0A5599

          Hmm. I was about to comment that “art” is in the eye of the beholder and that not everyone interprets things the way the artist intended. Duchamp’s Fountain came to mind.

          Then I realized that was the inspiration for the exhaust.

          https://cakeordeathsite.files.wordpress.com/2019/01/fountain-duchamp1.jpg

        2. Vairship Avatar
          Vairship

          They’re following furniture designers, https://www.thetimes.co.uk/article/mid-century-modern-furniture-is-not-going-out-of-fashion-vwghg5shb The lead image in that article is a sofa seemingly designed for people with VERY short lower legs, VERY long upper legs, and VERY short backs. And who ever thought a vertical backrest was comfortable for a sofa? If I’m not mistaken there was a time when ergonomics was an important part of any industrial design degree. Not anymore, I guess.

  4. Sjalabais Avatar
    Sjalabais

    You have a point there, BMW tries to be polarizing indeed. I think they realized in the Bangle years that controversy sells. It creates a false sense of relevance, and BMW is big enough to keep rolling and selling nonetheless. It’s like those people you meet who say they like cars, and then all they know is that “BMW and Porsche are best”, but they’ve never even heard of one cool car.

    1. Maymar Avatar
      Maymar

      Also, it’s not as if people with money (you know, the people is far more interested in keeping happy than the nebulous “car community”) haven’t shown much interest in subdued things, or just good taste in general.

      1. Sjalabais Avatar
        Sjalabais

        Indeed, conspicuous consumption is by no means a new concept. But it’s funny how non-conspicuous design is hard to find. I guess Audi is an option.

  5. neight428 Avatar
    neight428

    *cheering noises from Ingolstadt*

  6. Lokki Avatar
    Lokki

    I don’t have the photoshop skills to make this happen but all I can think of when I see that is “Dual-Edsel” grill.

    As for Outback Ute’s comment,

    Oh for the days when BMW design reflected some sort of logic, or form follows function…”

    I have to tell you that those days have been over for a while. A couple months ago, I was looking at the rear end of my 2019 5-Series and noticed that I have dual exhausts. “That’s nice for you, Lokki.”you say, “So what?”

    Well my 528i has an inline 4 cylinder engine. So every time I see those dual exhausts now, I want to hang my head in shame for being such a poseur…

    A reminder of the fabulous Edsel
    https://us-browse.startpage.com/av/anon-image?piurl=https%3A%2F%2Fimages.fineartamerica.com%2Fimages%2Fartworkimages%2Fmediumlarge%2F1%2Fedsel-grill-bob-christopher.jpg&sp=1600952180T483e8dc7c5d4358dda50ddbc1a08bffa47d256ae5c41a401dbaf1a5312d7e3e3

  7. onrails Avatar
    onrails

    Anyone think it’s coincidence that the marketing photos of the M and Non-M 4 series all have front license plates on them? They know.

  8. SlowJoeCrow Avatar
    SlowJoeCrow

    Apparently BMW’s current design team has trouble differentiating shocking from clever.