Last Call: Like a Rock Edition

Chevrolet
Well ooh la la, somebody got themselves a fancy new truck. Now pass me the Frito-Lets
Last Call indicates the end of Hooniverse’s broadcast day. It’s meant to be an open forum for anyone and anything. Thread jacking is not only accepted, it’s encouraged. 
Image: Imgur

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    1. What’s the tell on that? I own a ’91 GMC Sierra, and other than the badges I can’t tell mine from the Chevs. The black bumper?

      1. According to the man who sold me my last car, not even GM really knows the difference, as he recalled having to switch steering wheels around when working for a GM dealer back in the day because the badges would sometimes come wrong.

  1. I’ve heard a few people pronounce it Chevro-LET, so the universe obviously needed misinformed balance.

      1. Brent Mooseburger used to broadcast games sponsored by “Shivolay” according to him..Or was it the Shivolay player of the game. Game after game, week after week. Apparently Chevrolet didn’t bother to complain, or more likely Mooseburger, who was rather full of himself, didn’t feel like pronouncing a sponsor’s name other than the way he learned it on his home planet.

  2. Back when I had a laser cutter at my beck-and-call, I toyed with the idea of creating a badge for Steve The Unremarkable White Pickup. Instead of the big “GMC” on the tailgate… I wanted to get some vaguely proper red, back-textured plastic and mylarized trim plastic to create a badge that read “JDM”.
    Closest I got to that cognitive dissonance was this, and only my mechanic ever sees it.

  3. Iggy Pop.
    (I should first say that Douglas Adams and Joey Ramone both died at the age of 49, within a month of each other. One was a genius punk rocker addicted to drugs and hard living in the Bowery of New York, the other was a genius science fiction playwright addicted to the literary life in North London. For some reason, this is a lesson to me. You can die before 50 and it doesn’t matter how you live your life, you’re still dead.)
    Iggy Pop has collaborated with, and buried, Jim Morrison and David Bowie. He’s older than Steven Tyler, and younger than Mick Jagger; not by much. Older than Adams and Ramone, anyway. Iggy Pop is a male of Teutonic descent, and has, like the Pope Emeritus, a shorter life expectancy.
    Where am I going with this? I don’t know. Why am I posting it on a car blog? No other outlet.
    I guess, it’s to say that the deaths of my heroes aren’t as painful as they’re made out to be. Also, conversely, the despicable continued survival of my anti-heroes is a little bit more easy to swallow. I can continue to listen to the rock and roll that my heroes made, while continuing to ignore the crap the imbeciles continually put out. Business as usual.
    Iggy Pop? He hasn’t done much for me lately. Not since John Waters’ Cry-Baby. Maybe I stopped paying attention. How will I mark his inevitable passing? The guy’s kind of an asshole. His music is a great influence on me, but I think I’ll mourn the death of output more than the death of the man, and really, what has he done for me lately?

    1. Okay, too keep it tenuously car related… I found this video of some Chevrolet promotional film with a soundtrack of “My Death” by Scott Walker. In it, “Death” is re-cast as a Fred Astaire-esque tuxedoed phantom who haunts a young girl’s dreams of Tri-Five powered luxury.
      David Bowie’s cover of Scott Walker’s “My Death” has, understandably, been making the rounds lately. (Pedantically, Scott Walker’s version was a re-arrangement of sweaty, buck toothed Belgian cabaret singer Jaques Brel’s “La Mort”.)
      This is deliciously perverse.

    2. Mr. Pop regularly hosts a programme on the BBC’s alt-music radio station Radio 6, so I have heard him a lot in the last couple of years. He has an eclectic musical taste, great background knowledge and is generous in his praise for others who have lent influence or gained his admiration. So I’d miss him…
      David Bowie’s death this week was sad, but not painful to me. The news coverage in the UK was so respectful and made clear — to those who might not have realised it before — just how much he achieved, just how many he influenced and just how many decades he had a significant influence in our culture.
      I am sure that Bowie would have wished for more years of health and productivity, but thinking back over what he had achieved with the 65 years he had filled me with admiration. A week of his music filling the airwaves has left me glad at what we gained rather than sad at what we have lost.

  4. I don’t have a smart phone. Don’t want the expense.
    I do want digital maps I can keep on the laptop. They need to be detailed enough to have all roads, not just main routes like on the scanned paper-type state maps I do find online.
    Does anybody know of good, downloadable maps?

    1. I like the DeLorme map and GPS company. They offer what you’re looking for, and more. I haven’t found a demonstrator for it, so I can’t tell you how good it is. If you’re anywhere near Portland, Maine you can drive to their map store and try it out. While you’re there, check out Eartha, the world’s largest rotating globe.
      https://shop.delorme.com/OA_HTML/DELibeCCtpSctDspRte.jsp?section=10120
      http://www.visitportland.com/pictures/membersbig/ttat1-c0336-10.jpg

      1. Thanks, Batsh!t. I did discover that one can download really great USGS topo Quads for free, but each one is a big file and I’d need thousands of them…

        1. Don’t you still need GIS software to open those files? I used to use ESRI ArcView GIS to make maps from USGS and municipal data, but the file extensions were usually obscure. Those USGS Quads are sometimes just scans of their old paper maps, sometimes .TIFF or MrSID image files.

          1. http://historicalmaps.arcgis.com/usgs/ offers both historical and current downloadable USGS maps in .pdf format. However, the problem with even the most recent maps is that they often aren’t updated enough to reflect the latest road changes, particularly in areas experiencing rapid growth.

    2. posted yesterday night, but it disappeared: you can get a cheap smartphone to use on your regular plan, and google maps lets you (i believe) download sections of maps for use offline. won’t cost you much more than a single lonely franklin for a decent smartphone and if you buy one for your cell company’s pay-as-you-go plans you should be able to just pop in your sim card and go.
      as a side bonus, it’ll help convince you that maybe a data plan is worth the investment. are non-data plans even a thing anymore?

    3. Do you have an iPod Touch or some sort of Android device with GPS enabled? Nokia’s Here maps (maps.here.com) has iOS and Android apps available with the ability to download and use all the maps offline. Free, works, slick.

  5. I totally had a Hooniverse dream last night!
    There was a post about comparing classic models to their modern versions. Except, Hooniverse was not a website but a clubhouse, or at least the driveway of the Hoon who came up with the idea; and it wasn’t a blog post with comments but a bunch of commenters showing up and actually driving the two cars! LARPing the Hooniverse, I guess.
    The cars were two “Volvo II”s, although the newer one might have been a “Volvo III”, the badges were hard to read (dream, remember?). They looked identical, tan colored and basically an early 200 series. Since they were high-performance models (!) the front ends were radically different from the hoodline down, with a mix of heavily vented wheel wells and chrome trim that somehow came across as something you’d find on a Zimmer or a Stutz or some other 80’s retro ugly.
    About 4 Hoons jumped in the modern, “Volvo III” leaving me with the classic “Volvo II”, which I got to drive solo after the owner of the driveway moved a flat black Alfa Spider with a bizarre duck-bill front bumper. We were in the Hudson Valley of New York, and I promptly got lost on the other side of Rhinebeck. I was worried about being out of communication with the other car, and the more traffic I got stuck in, and the slower the “high-performance” Volvo was on the open road, the more anxious I got.
    Eventually, I found myself at the entrance to a toll road (called The George Washington Parkway, but running where the Taconic State Parkway is), declared myself irretrievably lost, and spent the night in a hostel (former mental hospital?) sharing a room with a weird, silent old man cooking his dinner, and his black cat.
    Let me tell you, the Chorizo and Black Bean Burrito I had for dinner is a prime suspect in this weirdness.

    1. This sounds like it could be a description of a David Lynch film. Also, maybe the the green herb in that burrito wasn’t cilantro.

    2. About 4 Hoons jumped in the modern, “Volvo III” leaving me with the classic “Volvo II”
      …and this is were you realized it was just a dream?

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