Just Because You Can Do Something Doesn't Mean You Should

Pete Gaines

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Hey guys, were you aware that the Dodge Challenger and Ye Olde Plymouth Superbird come from (roughly, sorta, not really) the SAME COMPANY? Did you know that? Isn’t that cool? Gee, if only there were a way to celebrate these two muscle cars’ (not really) shared heritage? What could we do to show off some sort of imagined spiritual connection between these two not-at-all-the-same vehicles separated by 40 years and, like, thousands of other reasons?

Nope, not that at all. What the hell were you even thinking, guy at the Monroe County (MI) County Fair? What is WRONG with you? I’ve lost my appetite now. Forget I even said anything.

[Photo Credit: Craig Barker]

[Editor’s Note – Who are we to judge… we turned a BMW 6-Series into a Superbird for LeMons after all]

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Pete Gaines

Pete Gaines

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30 responses to “Just Because You Can Do Something Doesn't Mean You Should”

  1. Rust-MyEnemy Avatar
    Rust-MyEnemy

    Lose the chrome wheels and we'll talk…
    …about how best to dispose of the rest of it.

    Reply
    1. skitter Avatar
      skitter

      This would be perfected, I think, with full wheel covers at all four corners.

      Reply
  2. Scandinavian Flick ★ Avatar
    Scandinavian Flick ★

    Honestly, that actually turned out about as good as it possibly could have.

    Reply
    1. Dean Bigglesworth Avatar
      Dean Bigglesworth

      That's a bit like saying this monkeypoop smoothie isn't as bad as i expected!
      I don't want to hate on it, but I don't think it works particularly well either.
      I'm conflicted.
      <img src="http://i.imgur.com/YnSMmzS.gif&quot; width="300" </img>

      Reply
      1. Scandinavian Flick ★ Avatar
        Scandinavian Flick ★

        Oh, I didn't say it turned out well at all.

        Reply
        1. Dean Bigglesworth Avatar
          Dean Bigglesworth

          What i was trying to say is that a monkeypoop smoothie is a monkeypoop smoothie. A pound of delicious, freshly picked wild strawberries that you picked in a beautiful meadow one warm and foggy summer night while on a walk with the most beautiful woman in the world, won't make it any less disgusting. Don't put your strawberries in a monkeypoopsmoothie, lie down in the grass and eat them as is.

          Reply
          1. dead_elvis Avatar
            dead_elvis

            What if said monkeys had been fed a diet consisting solely of delicious wild strawberries, harvested by beautiful women under ideal berry-pickin' conditions?

      2. Rich Avatar
        Rich

        I saw Scanners in the theater when it was first released: I wish I could experience seeing this for the first time again in a room full of unsuspecting, non-jaded people again.

        Reply
    2. Devin Avatar
      Devin

      According to the lyrics, this is the best that this woman could do.
      [youtube QJuu_4SR8-Y http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QJuu_4SR8-Y youtube]
      That doesn't mean she should have done it.
      (Though, for honesty, I'll confess I mostly wanted to subject everyone else to the torture of that recording.)

      Reply
      1. njhoon Avatar
        njhoon

        Thank you for equalizing the pain in my ears with the pain in my eyeballs.

        Reply
  3. JayP2112 Avatar
    JayP2112

    Almost like an Uncanny Valley for cars… close enough to freak you the hell out.
    Along those lines:
    I can dig it.
    <img src="http://image.mustangmonthly.com/f/featuredvehicles/mump_1104_retrobuilt_mustang_mach_1_conversions/30882869/mump_1104_10%2Bretrobuilt_mustang_mach_1_conversions%2BGT500CS_convertible.jpg&quot; width="600">
    Still looks good.
    <img src="http://www.blogcdn.com/www.autoblog.com/media/2012/11/06-retrobuilt-1969-mustang-fastback-fd-opt.jpg&quot; width="600">
    RUN AWAY.
    <img src="http://www.allfordmustangs.com/forums/attachments/2005-2010-mustang-talk/74956d1248496901-new-retrobuilt-1969-shelby-gt500-mustang-week-2009-69rightside.jpg&quot; width="600">

    Reply
    1. smokyburnout Avatar
      smokyburnout

      That's awful, but I didn't mean to downvote you! Sorry

      Reply
    2. Rover1 Avatar
      Rover1

      Uncanny valley is so right. They appear more jarring to the senses than the Miatastang
      <img src="http://www.miata.net/skidmarks/images/MiataMustang.jpg"width="600"&gt;

      Reply
  4. Maymar Avatar
    Maymar

    I don't hate it. That said, it'd probably work slightly better on the current generation Charger, given that it's a longer looking car.

    Reply
    1. jeepjeff Avatar
      jeepjeff

      Original Charger: B-Body. Original Challenger: E-Body. Original Superbird? B-Body.
      While the modern Charger and Challenger are both LX platform vehicles, they're variants (you knew that). The Challenger uses a shortened version. So you're right, it would work better with the Charger, on a couple levels.
      Well, except for the turning a 4-door design into a 2-door design is a lot more body work, time and money than just tacking a wing and a nose onto the Challenger.

      Reply
      1. Maymar Avatar
        Maymar

        To be fair, it doesn't bother me that the Charger's four doors, so it's not about to bother me that this hypothetical Superbird/Charger Daytona is four doors (the Charger has a sleeker roofline than the Challenger anyhow).
        Besides, real Chargers are FWD turbo hatches, and we're not getting that back anytime soon…

        Reply
  5. Batshitbox Avatar
    Batshitbox

    It's like Star Wars movies. When the latter day trilogy was in theaters every one of my Gen-X cohort were all, "This is horrible! The acting is so melodramatic! The dialog is so cringeworthy! The characters are so two dimensional! Gaah!" Until we went back and watched the original trilogy, and realized that was what made a Star Wars film a Star Wars film, they're just swashbuckling serials.
    The original Superbird was pretty fucking ugly. I spent a whole summer at close quarters with one at the car museum I worked in as a teenager and really, they're fugly. It's a car with a bad boob job and padded jeans.The Superbird was an ungainly, pasted together ridiculous exponent of the oval track muscle wars, yet with a charm all its own for sheer exuberance and balls.
    And this fugly pasted together homage to the Superbird? Given there's no Plymouth platform to base one on now, you make do with what you got. That's hot rodding. To me it's a tribute to the exuberance and silliness of the late '60s. It's just as awkward and specific as the original. And ugly; real real ugly. I can't look at it for too long, but I can't look at the base car for very long anyway.
    That said, however… why not stick a nose and a tail on a modern day Charger and honor the Superbird's predecessor, the '69 Charger Daytona?
    <img src="http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/7/75/ChargerDaytona.jpg/640px-ChargerDaytona.jpg&quot; width="550/">

    Reply
  6. MVEilenstein Avatar
    MVEilenstein

    I can't be the only one who finds this appealing on some level.

    Reply
    1. wisc47 Avatar
      wisc47

      Thank you for saying it. I mean don't get me wrong, I hate that I like it, but it's definitely appealing in a weird Steve Buscemi-esq way.

      Reply
    2. BlackIce_GTS Avatar
      BlackIce_GTS

      It sort of looks like The King, who I think is a really great design:
      <img src="http://www.cartownforums.com/forums/downloads/hedezines-wallpaper_cars_king_J2Q.jpg&quot; width=500>
      All the other characters I can think of just look cartoony, but this one is also really cool.
      Merchandisepalooza that Cars is, it took me a rather long time to find one of them. Is it a model, or a figurine?

      Reply
      1. MVEilenstein Avatar
        MVEilenstein

        Action figure?

        Reply
    3. Carter Avatar
      Carter

      I like it too. Okay maybe not like, but if I saw it at a show I'd think "oh hey, cool idea". Sure it's not a Charger, but if Dodge ever made a two door I'm sure someone would use it.

      Reply
    4. papamarc Avatar
      papamarc

      I want one….

      Reply
      1. MVEilenstein Avatar
        MVEilenstein

        You need a mullet first.

        Reply
  7. Sjalabais Avatar
    Sjalabais

    Where did I park my ride again?
    <img src="http://img.chefkoch.de/ck.de/fotoalben/afc1b6504005d57ae986247d06beb4d9/24420/full_schnabeltier.jpg"&gt;
    On the other side of the river called "probability".

    Reply
  8. zen_monkey Avatar
    zen_monkey

    hard to say. I once encountered a General Lee Charge done with effort.
    It was in the wild, but could have passed for a show car.
    Right paint, stripes, even the CB radio.
    To complete the look the driver was wearing a matching jacket. (as such things go).
    Only one problem. Wrong year.

    Reply
  9. Alff Avatar
    Alff

    Don't be too hard on him. Maybe he's trying to homologate it.

    Reply
    1. MVEilenstein Avatar
      MVEilenstein

      Just 4,999 to go.

      Reply
  10. vroomsocko Avatar
    vroomsocko

    Meanwhile, in picturesque Nova Scotia…
    <img src="http://cdn.speednik.com/files/2011/11/redneck-super-bird.jpg&quot; width="500"> http://www.streetlegaltv.com/news/redneck-superbi…

    Reply
  11. R.L. Elliott Avatar
    R.L. Elliott

    My eyes! My eyes! PLEASE..BURN IT WITH FIRE!!!! 🙂

    Reply