Hooniverse Classic Captions – The 1963 Chevrolet Corvette Sting Ray Edition

1963 Corvette Ad-05

Welcome to the Hooniverse Classic Captions Post, returning from an extended vacation through the holidays. This is a series of postings that are set to go off at this time almost every Tuesday, so let’s review the premise; I search for images that were used by the car companies in their print advertising or brochures, and it is your job to provide a humorous, snarky, or thought provoking caption that is some how tied in with the image. Let’s see you try and come up with a clever caption for this week, and if you haven’t participated, isn’t it time for you to do so?

6404089269_8f53be93fc_oLast time, we had an image of a Woman flagging down a ride with a Broken Shoe, and we received the highest number of comments ever for this series (Well done!). One of our longtime fans, $kaycog, actually came close to winning the contest this time with this great caption: “Out of gas, Boris? You’re such a heel to make me walk to the gas pumps. What a soulless loafer you are.” Of course, this lead to a series of puns, and was one of the most entertaining series of banter ever. Way to go $kaycog!

However, our old friend Alff came up with the winning caption this time, with this great comment: “A woman waving her shoe at a Skoda. One is reliable communist transportation technology … the other is a Skoda.” Congratulations Alff on coming up with another brilliant caption.

It’s now time to take a look at this weeks illustration. This is an advertising image for the 1963 Chevrolet Corvette Sting Ray Coupe, with a rather handsome woman tossing her hat onto… well, you know it’s the 1960s, since this particular piece of lawn art isn’t around anymore. This is a great period piece of advertising, since the Corvette is always thought of as a Man’s car. Obviously, this is a woman of means, either by her own making, or by marriage. So, is this really a good image to sell a Corvette? (You can click here to see the full size image)

You have the next five days to come up with a great caption. The editors will deliberate entries, and after having the Mrs. abscond with our sports car, we will pronounce a winner. So, get to work and create you’re own caption for this intriguing image.

Photo Credit: The Old Car Manual Project


  1. Mrs. Benny got sick of Jack's penny pinching and took him for a ride in the divorce even going so far to take half of Rochester with her.

  2. Here Shinoda, hold my hat. I can't see anything trying to back up with this big bar in the middle of the window. These cars will never catch on.

  3. I saw this old witch driving a Sting Ray, and told her such a powerful car was probably too much for her.
    She turned me into a lawn statue, and all they found was my hat.

    1. Are you trying to top last week's pun thread and be the toque of the blog again? This topic could be a bit of a challenge, but I'll try to bowler you over anyway…
      Pith helmet.

          1. Apparently you missed the advisory that the puns detract from the point of this contest.

          2. Very well, herr Capotain. No more puns, apparently you're quite fez'd up with them. Mitre I ask why, though?

          3. The author didn't put a lid on the pun threads. He said that it gave him ten gallon of happiness.

          4. I feel as though I am brimming with things to say here. Maybe we need to kippah a limit on the puns though?

          5. Kepi your head up. Don't let him brow beat you, this is turbaning out to be a great thread.

          6. Is the headache from the thread, or did you have a few too many nightcaps yesterday?

    1. The statue of limitations on her stealing the car had just ended when this shot was taken.
      FTFY! 😀

  4. Judy's increasingly extreme attempts to prevent her husband from driving their new Corvette would soon draw the suspicion of her neighbors.

    1. Turns out this made sense only to me (and actively annoyed someone else). It was trying to play off the tagline and for some reason I thought about her turning her husband into a statue…
      Alright it doesn't even make sense to me anymore, I'll cop to that.

  5. As she discarded the last piece of evidence while driving away from the Men's Club, Joanna knew that she would no longer be called a Stepford wife.

    1. In all fairness, "lawn jockeys" such as the one shown here did not start out as racist symbols but as a way for underground railroad houses to signal that it was safe to enter. This article does a nice write up. http://www.ferris.edu/htmls/news/jimcrow/question
      That said the connotation definitely works in this pic so your caption earned an up vote from me!

      1. Interesting, I did not know that. I would venture that those who display them today (yes, I still see them from time to time) are probably unaware of their history as well.

          1. Some of the cranky old timers in my last neighborhood had them in the late nineties, and there's a house a few miles away that still has one. Leaves me shaking my head.

  6. And this wasn't the only hat trick Cecilia found she could do with her new Corvette. I'd like to tell you about them, but those stories are all blue.

  7. After tossing his hat outside and checking his makeup in the mirror, Lou's costume was complete and he rolled off to the local 1/4 mile track to teach those doubters the real meaning of 'drag queen'.

    1. I thought I'd destroyed the last of those negatives…
      But, when I say I'm in the pink, I'm talking slips.

  8. Good thing that I'm a rich woman with a Corvette in 1963, because racial sensitivity means nothing to me.

  9. By honey, hope you have a good trip. Tell your mother sorry I couldn't make it this time…oh don't forget your hat.

  10. Gwyneth was the life of the Grosse Pointe Junior League. Her Magical Levitating Hat trick, for example, was just superb.

  11. Autocrosses at the Birmingham Country club were a little different. Hitting the cast iron lawn jockey did a lot more than just add two seconds to your time. But if you could retrieve the hat your time was reduced by 10 seconds.

  12. Today, while I was at work, my sister stole my iPad
    and tested to see if it can survive a forty foot drop, just so she
    can be a youtube sensation. My iPad is now destroyed and she has 83 views.
    I know this is entirely off topic but I had to share it
    with someone!

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    I will be coming back to your site for more soon.

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