Hooniverse Asks- What's The New Stereotypical Old Man's Car?

 As cool as you eventually realize they are, eventually everybody’s mom and dad gets to an age when cars become more of a rolling rest home than a road eater, and proclivities toward brands and demands change, just like waistlines, and hairlines. Yesterday we wondered what cars you were waiting around to become barely legal cheap enough to make sense. That waiting game has proven to be as popular with car nuts as Chutes and Ladders, but it does put a kink in one’s hose when it comes to instant gratification. Of course, the other issue with waiting is that your interests may change, and that GT-R you’ve been watching drop in value year after year, may not be as attractive when it finally gets in your price range because you grown some new sensibilities, including a penchant for wearing your pants hiked up to mid-navel because it’s just so damn comfortable. When that occurs, it used to be a pretty easy choice – you either went Buick, Oldsmobile, or, if you were really a Saggy McMoneypants, a Lincoln, Benz or Caddy. But today that’s all changed. Olds is long gone, Cadillac, the Germans, and even Buick all now make twitchy cars with – god help you – stick shifts and dead pedals. At your age, you don’t like anything that comes with something that’s called dead. Lincoln at least still knows how to velour-up an interior, and the Town Car is big enough to do some real damage should one of those punk kids try and fight you for that left lane – and your blinker is on because you’re planning to exit. . . in 25 miles. But even Ford’s septuagenarian-friendly brand is changing – or disappearing depending on who you believe – and the Town Car? Gone the way of your sex drive. So what’s an old fart to do these days? It used to be that American manufacturers had a product for every life stage, from entry to exit, but when they decided to start building utter crap and people took a leap of faith with foreign cars, they lost the Hometown Buffet crowd. What do you think is now the poster car of the AARP? What current product is besmirched with the title of the choice of an old generation? Image source: [adrants.com]

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