Hooniverse Asks- How Do You Dress Your Car?

Robert Emslie

/comment

Comments

Some people announce just how big their family is on the back of there cars. To me, that’s making it a little too easy for the Pedo Bears to do their shopping. Other folks like to demonstrate their derision for a competing brand by having Calvin, of Calvin and Hobbes fame, engage in water sports with the logo. The aisles of Auto Parts stores are filled with flames, shatter sports baseballs and faux portholes. Do you like to adorn your vehicle of choice with such contributions to the arts? Oh, and by the way, Mrs. Cox appears to have a very nice rack.

Some people, myself included, prefer their cars to be au naturale, while others see their rides as rolling billboards, blank canvases for the expression of their artistic bent and perspective.
Do you still have that Gore 2000 bumper sticker fading away on your car’s ass? How about a big band aid with “ouch” written on it covering a recent door ding? The options for automotive adornment seem virtually endless and appear to have taken over from the molded plastic cup-holder/tissue box-type accessories at the local Walmarts as impulse purchases.
Given that we all seek to broadcast our aspirational self, promoting our favorite team, or our loathing of a rival on our cars can be a highly visible, and non-confrontational method. Although there have been cases of people with rival political views taking physical actions toward those espousing ideas that run counter to theirs, via bumper stickers. We call those people parolees.
So, have you ever stuck a sticker on your car? Does Calvin relieve himself on your back window? Is your family lined up on the back of the Hummer for all the world to see? Or, is your car a barren wasteland of opinion?
Image sources: [techpin.com, rlsportslines.com]

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Robert Emslie

Robert Emslie

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78 responses to “Hooniverse Asks- How Do You Dress Your Car?”

  1. Texan_Idiot25 Avatar
    Texan_Idiot25

    The one and only sticker on the CST10, except for the "Support Zombies" ribbon that rides on the metal dash.
    <img src= "http://sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc1/hs169.snc1/6333_119698903578_669203578_2426841_4495079_n.jpg"&gt;

    Reply
    1. Dr_Dangerously Avatar
      Dr_Dangerously

      I have to get one of those ribbons, hell yeah.

      Reply
      1. Texan_Idiot25 Avatar
        Texan_Idiot25

        <img src="http://i42.photobucket.com/albums/e321/texan_idiot25/IMG_1243.jpg&quot; border="0" alt="Photobucket">

        Reply
    2. CaptainZeroCool Avatar
      CaptainZeroCool

      Where does one get a "Support Zombies" ribbon? I've spent the last 20 minutes looking and my googlefu has failed me.

      Reply
      1. Texan_Idiot25 Avatar
        Texan_Idiot25

        I don't even know. Got it from a friend. I can't find it online either.

        Reply
    3. Tanshanomi Avatar
      Tanshanomi

      See now, I went in the opposite direction with the Town Cow.
      <img src="http://www.tanshanomi.com/temp/0414001104-scaled.jpg&quot; HEIGHT=480 WIDTH=640>
      And yea, it's kind of a long story…

      Reply
  2. Goingincirclez Avatar
    Goingincirclez

    The GIC Family Truckster currently sports:
    – "My Other Car is a Locomotive" license frame from the B&O Railroad Museum. Please note this is actually true, because The Angstmobile weighs nearly as much, smokes as much, and thanks to the exhaust leak, SOUNDS like a locomotive…
    – Chrome Chicago White Sox logo on the driver's side tailgate pillar – the angles match nicely, and I gotta rep the South Siders.
    – NIN logo sticker centered under the CHMSL. Because a NIN sticker on family vehicle freaks people out, it seems.

    Reply
    1. engineerd Avatar
      engineerd

      I'm digging the NIN logo on the family truckster. You've inspired me.

      Reply
    2. DeadinSideInc Avatar
      DeadinSideInc

      NIN, very good.
      Add a year zero flag.

      Reply
      1. mix3d3m0ti0n5 Avatar
        mix3d3m0ti0n5

        The Year Zero flag is on our laptop.

        Reply
  3. Dr_Dangerously Avatar
    Dr_Dangerously

    My car is nice and sticker free.
    Although, I was thinking of getting a sticker on the back window to help finding it in a parking lot.

    Reply
  4. Alff Avatar
    Alff

    <img src="http://www.tantomotor.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/04/soshinoya11.jpg"&gt;

    Reply
    1. Mike_the_Dog Avatar
      Mike_the_Dog

      Scholastic Book Services? If so, I heartily approve. [Hell, it's obviously a book, so I approve anyway]

      Reply
      1. Alff Avatar
        Alff

        It's a Soshinoya sticker that all new drivers in Japan are required to display.

        Reply
        1. Mike_the_Dog Avatar
          Mike_the_Dog

          I learned something new today. IIRC, the colors are the same as SBS' old logo, which is an open book from a different angle. I was unable to find a color pic of it in a quick search.

          Reply
        2. name_too_long Avatar
          name_too_long

          It's hilarious how many people have those on their car that have no idea what they mean. All they know is that it's "JDM yo".
          The other one that gets me are the 17 year olds with "Advanced Driver" tags… "Advanced Driver" in Japan essentially means "Senior Citizen" in the US… ie this person is so old their ability to drive may be impaired, look out.

          Reply
          1. Tanshanomi Avatar
            Tanshanomi

            Whenever I finally get my dream XJS, I'm putting one of these on it…
            <img src="http://www.edmunds.com/media/ownership/driving/graduated.driver.license/learner.500.jpg&quot; width="250">

  5. Mike_the_Dog Avatar
    Mike_the_Dog

    Eagle:
    <img src="http://farm5.static.flickr.com/4026/4520499099_4a6c653f54.jpg&quot; width="500" height="375" alt="Eagle" />
    Rambler
    <img src="http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2700/4520498969_18b66471a1.jpg&quot; width="500" height="375" alt="Rambler" />
    The really observant may notice a pattern…

    Reply
    1. BGW Avatar
      BGW

      Mike, how in the h-e-double-hockey-sticks do you have an Eagle from Whitten Brothers here in Confederateland?

      Reply
      1. Mike_the_Dog Avatar
        Mike_the_Dog

        I paid the exorbitant sum of $400 for it in Powhatan County a couple of years back and drove it home. I got the Rambler for free down there later the same year.

        Reply
        1. BGW Avatar
          BGW

          Note to self: next time I drive through Powhatan, stop and look for AMC products lurking in the woods.

          Reply
          1. Mike_the_Dog Avatar
            Mike_the_Dog

            I think I got 'em all…

      2. Novaload Avatar
        Novaload

        That was my first question too!

        Reply
    2. joshuman Avatar
      joshuman

      I might have to wear my Driveshaft Through The Skull T-shirt tomorrow. It is always a good conversation starter.

      Reply
  6. Maymar Avatar
    Maymar

    My current vehicle is rather naked, as was the last one (I had a Mickey Mouse antenna topper on it for a while, as my mom's condition of me getting the car as a hand-me-down, but it disappeared). The Cavalier (which still sits in my driveway) wears a sticker for my college's annual auto show, and a Future LeMons car decal. I suppose I could transfer that to the Civic, but I'm afraid what it would do to my head gasket, and if that would void the warranty.

    Reply
  7. Thrashy Avatar
    Thrashy

    <img src="http://images1.cafepress.com/product/78890411v6_480x480_Front.jpg"&gt;
    …It's a long story and you probably be bored.
    There's also a Swiss country code sticker on the hatch glass, but that was the previous owner's affectation and I've never gotten around to taking it off. I wonder how many people see the "CH" and think I'm from China, though?

    Reply
  8. xomputer Avatar
    xomputer

    <img src="http://farm5.static.flickr.com/4015/4278539065_7cc5415ea7.jpg"&gt;
    this has always bothered me

    Reply
    1. Alff Avatar
      Alff

      Is that to record kills? If so, bully for the driver.

      Reply
  9. engineerd Avatar
    engineerd

    The only sticker on my car is this:
    <img src="http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2709/4521134232_450db33e57.jpg"&gt;
    Actually, I take that back. I have a DoD sticker for the Detroit Arsenal so I can go in the back gate for a project I'm on.
    <img src="http://farm5.static.flickr.com/4007/4520494897_d125a3f3fd.jpg"&gt;
    Other than that, the only other bit of personalization on my car is an Embry-Riddle Alumni license plate frame.

    Reply
    1. Alff Avatar
      Alff

      You've got to lose that extra "b" and "r".

      Reply
    2. damnelantra™[!] Avatar
      damnelantra™[!]

      dude i hope you are helping to build robocop.

      Reply
      1. engineerd Avatar
        engineerd

        No way, man! Robots are dangerous. They become sentient and start taking out humans.

        Reply
    3. Mechanically Inept Avatar
      Mechanically Inept

      Oh, man, In-N-Out Burger. When I was last in California, I made it a point to go there. I figured that, since it's exclusive to the west coast, I live in MIchigan, and I've heard of it, then it must be really good. I was not disappointed. They need to open one in MI.

      Reply
    4. FTGDHoonEdition Avatar
      FTGDHoonEdition

      Engineering any sweet tanks at TACOM? Actually, I don't want to know…. ;P

      Reply
  10. discontinuuity Avatar
    discontinuuity

    I don't own a car, but my bicycle has several promotional stickers from local microbrews (yes, I work at a liquor store), and an Apple sticker.
    This is my current favorite, although the "support zombies" one above is pretty cool:
    <img src="http://farm5.static.flickr.com/4071/4420978527_f460892a4a.jpg"&gt;

    Reply
    1. Goingincirclez Avatar
      Goingincirclez

      From the spatters on the window it looks like Calvin still needs practice.

      Reply
    2. Maymar Avatar
      Maymar

      Even though he's still alive, I imagine Bill Watterson's rolling over in his grave.
      Then again, with all the mindless Calvin stickers out there, graverolling Bill Watterson is the most viable green energy source we have available to us. Which makes it evil in the eyes of those with said Calvin stickers.

      Reply
    3. smokyburnout Avatar
      smokyburnout

      <img src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v648/smokyburnout/05-01-09_1233.jpg"&gt;
      My favorite: Calvin pissing on… nothing. He's just pissing.

      Reply
  11. BGW Avatar
    BGW

    No stickers, wraps, license plates or anything, and for a reason: my luck is bad enough as is, so the last thing I need is to piss off some barely-stable sociopath because he thinks Bell's Two-Hearted is swill or because the admissions dept at my college didn't recognize his genius or because the ex-girlfriend who won't return his calls also listened to the Hot Snakes.
    Now where'd I put that tinfoil hat?

    Reply
  12. joshuman Avatar
    joshuman

    Other than a dealership sticker that I have not yet had the patience to remove, there no stickers on my cars. The Priuses I regularly see seem to come standard with Obama election stickers though.

    Reply
    1. discontinuuity Avatar
      discontinuuity

      It's either that or "Namaste" or "Co-Exist" bumper stickers. Last time I got cut off by a Prius it has some Buddhist slogan on the bumper, something to the effect of "chill out man." Hypocritical hippies are the worst.

      Reply
      1. engineerd Avatar
        engineerd

        Last summer I got stuck behind a self-absorbed bitch yapping with her friend while blocking traffic. She had a "Coexist" sticker on her car. Finally, I got out and asked her if she could move before I make her not exist.

        Reply
        1. Maymar Avatar
          Maymar

          Apparently, she doesn't need to coexist with traffic.

          Reply
      2. Mike_the_Dog Avatar
        Mike_the_Dog

        Last winter I had to drive through 1.5 feet of fresh snow (in the Eagle, fortunately) to get around a Prius driving douche who was parked across (90° to the flow of traffic) the one plowed lane while her husband shoveled the contents of the driveway into said plowed lane. When I honked and told her she was number one (in the time-honored manner), she rolled down the window and hollered something back at me. When I asked her to repeat it she hollered "peace and love, man". I told her she was a disgrace to hippies everywhere and should do the world a favor and suck a tailpipe. F*cking Ann Arbor neo-hippe dirtbags…

        Reply
  13. P161911 Avatar
    P161911

    I have an alumni plate frame for the college i went to. Just added a small discreet magnet with the school logo. I removed the BMWCCA sticker since I haven't joined yet. Need to add the NRA, USPSA, and GSSF stickers to at least the truck.

    Reply
  14. James Avatar
    James

    the SPG has a few:
    black Tail of the Dragon logo on LR quarter window
    "Carolina" cling on back window, CC parking sticker on back window
    "Svenska" country sticker in license plate tub, to the right of the plate

    Reply
  15. acarr260 Avatar
    acarr260

    I've only had one car with a sticker on it so far. My old Toyota lowrider had a car club sticker on the front windshield – Lowco. I have a "Legalize Freedom" sticker, but I feel like putting that on my truck would be like asking to get pulled over every day.

    Reply
  16. Black Steelies Avatar
    Black Steelies

    landau bars and curtains, thanks. but i have been looking for some purple funeral flags as well

    Reply
  17. name_too_long Avatar
    name_too_long

    Nothing. I figure cops can be of any affiliation out there, why run the risk of pissing them off and eliminating any chance of talking my way out of a ticket.
    I have contemplated a Left Lane Drivers "Move Over" windshield decal… but it just doesn't seem right on an Altima.

    Reply
  18. damnelantra™[!] Avatar
    damnelantra™[!]

    mother nature, and the good folks running the 24hol.
    <img src="http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2609/4234495202_68d81085c8_b.jpg&quot; width="1024" height="482" alt="img_7001A" />
    im surprised i broke my cardinal rule of no stickers on the car… but i guess 24hol trumps all, and its only glass!

    Reply
  19. Al_Navarro Avatar
    Al_Navarro

    USA7s "Tail of the Dragon" Sticker on rear glass of Pilot. Lotus Club (US sticker) on side glass of Pilot. L7C UK Club Sticker (finally fell off) on side glass of Pilot. Kids' school sticker on Civic Hybrid. Nothing on e60. The old Superlight only had USA7s "TotD" sticker on rear and USA7s.org on rollbar. New/old Seven will probably have USA7s "TotD" sticker or the Christian fish symbol (that would be a first for me, btw…)

    Reply
    1. Goingincirclez Avatar
      Goingincirclez

      Will I be banned from the site for pining to take my stupid 2005 Freestyle on the TotD? I keep thinking this is something I need to do, but then I worry about becoming a rolling chicane (FWD + CVT FTL). The '97 T-bird might be a better choice. The Angstmobile would get me killed. But those are the only 3 at my relative disposal – drat. I need to plan a weekend and just do it – even if I can't properly hoon it the first time, I so badly want to drive it.

      Reply
      1. Maymar Avatar
        Maymar

        It's not about what you hoon, it's that you hooned it in the first place.

        Reply
      2. Al_Navarro Avatar
        Al_Navarro

        It's amazing place. If it was not 14 hours away, I would be there all the time. Go.
        I would take whatever gets you there, then try to bum a quick ride through with a local if possible. I might be able to arrange one for you. I cannot guarantee you won't puke, though.

        Reply
        1. Goingincirclez Avatar
          Goingincirclez

          It's only about 6 or so hours from me – definite there-and-back-in-a-weekend territory. I'll have to plan ahead a bit. Hitching is a great idea… I wonder how many serious types can be conned into schlepping a spare tire (and its attached Italian goomba) on a spirited run?
          Hmmm. I should get the wife to come with me in her car, we can trade seats for timed runs, or at least make tongue-in-cheek comparisons.
          Yes… I can't claim specifics right now, but I *will* do this at some point this summer!
          Maybe we should pick a date for a Hooniverse meet-up? Call it HoonFest 2010. Gotta start somewhere (and besides, we can't let Jeff and Rob and Tim and all the left-coasters have *all* the fun now, can we? Flyover States, Unite!)

          Reply
      3. Smells_Homeless Avatar
        Smells_Homeless

        The last time I was there, I met a freakin' semi coming around a turn. Imagine my surprise. You won't be the slowest thing there.

        Reply
  20. CaptainZeroCool Avatar
    CaptainZeroCool

    My Camry has the following:
    1) Arsenal Stickers for Fathers work.
    2) Parking sticker for where I work.
    3) Parking sticker for where my Mother works.
    4) Parking sticker for my sisters Uni.
    5) Parking sticker for my alma mater.
    6) Tag frame for my alma mater.
    7) Alabama Crimson Tide front tag.
    I think that is it…

    Reply
  21. Tim Odell Avatar
    Tim Odell

    Glass only…on the SS Country Sedan, only:
    Frankie + Skull
    <img src="http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2177/2278407661_3589aa965d.jpg&quot; width="500" height="334" alt="Sweet Window Stickers" />
    <img src="http://farm1.static.flickr.com/186/432169276_32b453c073.jpg&quot; width="500" height="334" alt="Right Rear (1).JPG" />

    Reply
  22. lilwillie Avatar
    lilwillie

    The '60 Apache has some old '80's and early '90s aftermarket stickers on the rear glass from Holley, Edlebrock. The E21 has the shop name on the roof in two spots which is covering up some paint that started to chip and I got lazy and didn't fix…..yet.
    The rest of them are naked. No stickers or anything.

    Reply
  23. mistic192 Avatar
    mistic192

    I only have 3 things in the back, 2 apple-stickers, 1 from my G4 iBook and one from my Macbook pro, and finally the coolest sticker you can put on any car : the nurburgringsticker that you get to put on your car after you've used it to do a lap on the nurburgring… the greatest honor for a car ever 🙂

    Reply
    1. BigFatGeek Avatar
      BigFatGeek

      Nurburgring sticker on the back of my EuroVan too. Drove the 'ring last September in a rental Seat.

      Reply
  24. SSurfer321 Avatar
    SSurfer321

    Before last Wednesday, I had a FuelSlut.net sticker center glass and a local snowboard shop sticker to it's left.
    <img src="http://i14.photobucket.com/albums/a317/ssurfer321/IMG_1426.jpg&quot; border="0" alt="Photobucket">
    <img src="http://i14.photobucket.com/albums/a317/ssurfer321/IMG_1425.jpg&quot; border="0" alt="Photobucket">
    Of course the new glass is naked.
    Word of advice: use caution when tossing railroad ties into the bed of a truck 🙁

    Reply
  25. soo΄pәr-bādd75 Avatar
    soo΄pәr-bādd75

    I've got a Tiki hanging from my rearview that my sister brought back from Hawaii, and that's the TB's only decoration. I have actually considered removing all of the factory adornments, leaving only the bowtie on the grill and wheel centercaps. Maybe one of these days.

    Reply
  26. Froggmann_ Avatar
    Froggmann_

    Bronco:
    <img src="http://i133.photobucket.com/albums/q53/Froggmann/93%20Bronco/Avatars/IMG_3276.jpg&quot; /img>
    <img src="http://i133.photobucket.com/albums/q53/Froggmann/Shows/Fab%20Fords%202009/IMG_3255-1.jpg&quot; /img>
    Maxima:
    Just a Maxima.org sticker.

    Reply
  27. VeeArrrSix Avatar
    VeeArrrSix

    Nurburgring sticker over 3rd brake light.
    http://static.autoblog.nl/images/wp2007/Bmw%20rea…

    Reply
  28. Tomsk Avatar
    Tomsk

    A "University of La Verne" cling at the bottom middle of the back window and the original Mercedes-Benz quality inspection sticker at the bottom left (if you're looking from the inside) corner of the original windshield.

    Reply
  29. CptSevere Avatar
    CptSevere

    Now that I think about it, I have a bumper sticker from some east coast cop union that my dad gave me years ago, and a "National Day of the Cowboy" bumper sticker from the feed store, on my F100's rear bumper. Kinda schizo. Oh, and the toolbox in the bed (it was free at a yard sale, I gave the guy a buck to help me load it) has a bumper sticker that says "IT STAYS UP LONGER WHEN YOU DO IT IN CONCRETE."

    Reply
  30. LTDScott Avatar
    LTDScott

    The only decals I have on any of my cars is a 24 Hours of LeMons sticker in the center bottom of the rear window of my LTD, and Ford Falcon GTHO "Super Roo" stickers in the rear quarter windows.
    Actually that's not true, my Crown Vic (which I am in the process of selling) has a "Ford Police Vehicles" decal in the back window too.

    Reply
  31. Smells_Homeless Avatar
    Smells_Homeless

    The only non-state-mandated sticker on my car is a Miskatonic University parking pass.

    Reply
  32. Avatar
    Anonymous
    Reply
  33. Nater Avatar
    Nater

    My family always supported some car decorations, starting with my brother covering my mom’s Subaru GL front bumper with army men when he was 16.
    That was followed by a white VW Pickup with 4 different (and brightly) colored wheels.
    The 88 Toyota 4×4 has seen some different iterations, but currently sports a blacked out hood center and roof, 3-foot PLAYMOBIL sticker on the passenger side, 3 rows of “kills” car outlines from a Mini ad, and a large Rainier Beer “R” on the hood. Yes, it may sound disjointed and random, and it is, but it’s awesome.

    Reply
  34. ChuckyShamrok Avatar
    ChuckyShamrok

    My truck has a "Question Authority" and Racing Code on the back glass right behind me so they don't screw up my vision. I had a couple more BMX stickers, but they all cracked up and feel apart

    Reply
  35. dculberson Avatar
    dculberson

    I wish I had a good picture to show it off, but one of the only stickers I've put on a car was a cut-up "D.A.R.E." sticker where all it said was "RESIST." It was black with white lettering put on the back of a black pickup so it was pretty cool.
    I don't go in for stickers much, really.

    Reply
  36. smokyburnout Avatar
    smokyburnout

    <img src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v648/smokyburnout/DSC05248.jpg"&gt;
    My car wears no stickers, just patina and a three-pointed star.
    I've been considering one of the Gottlieb Daimler signature stickers that newer Benzes wear on the windshield, even though he died 79 years before my car was built. I also want to get a fake employee parking pass made up, for like the Bluth Company, or Venture Industries, or Stark Industries, or Wayne Industries…
    Found this sticker under the hood of a Passat once at work.
    <img src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v648/smokyburnout/05-09-09_1256.jpg"&gt;

    Reply
  37. Mechanically Inept Avatar
    Mechanically Inept

    On my Porsche, the only decorations are the oil change stickers left there by previous owners, and a Geico sticker in the left rear quarter window. There's one oil change sticker on the windshield, with a date in 2003, and at 54,000 miles. Unfortunately, the odometer is broken at 52,000 miles.
    On my Caravan, there's the parking sticker for my high school and a Sierra Club sticker, both in the rear window. The Sierra Club one is for the ironic value, because the Caravan gets 18MPG, and burns/leaks a lot of oil.

    Reply
  38. mgrinshpon Avatar
    mgrinshpon

    On my '55 Chevy, I have a "Moroso Sport Compact Technology" and "SCCA" sticker on a cracked window I'll one day replace. I think both are hilarious every time I look at them.

    Reply
  39. FTGDHoonEdition Avatar
    FTGDHoonEdition

    Just a couple of parking permits from school and stuff on the windshield.

    Reply
  40. Novaload Avatar
    Novaload

    My car is naked as the day it was born, with the exception of a small UVA icon in the rear-est part of the rear window.
    In my mind, I have a ton of stickers I'd like to have, based on my own experiences. To wit:
    "Brakes are for people who can't steer."

    Reply