Hooniverse Asks: Is this the best holiday car ad?

I cringe every year when the holiday car advertisements start to show up. After this year’s political ad season, I almost welcomed it. Almost. It’s definitely the Midwesterner in me that’s talking, but I’ve never been able to wrap my head around presenting my spouse or child with a brand new vehicle as a holiday gift. Something has never sat right with me while watching those ads. This last weekend Saturday Night Live put those feelings into words for me. They spoofed the Lexus “December to Remember” ads with a version that makes much more sense.

My favorite line is “And how much is the monthly payment?” Kills me each time. I know every family handles money differently, but damn, I can’t even imagine committing to hanging out with family friends without checking with my wife.

Then there’s the GMC ad, where she chooses the vehicle he clearly picked for himself…

I’ll stop before these ads get too out of hand. Which automotive brand holiday theme do you celebrate? Is it a December to Remember, Happy Honda Days, or Toyotathon for your family? Definitely talk it over first. Share them below.

20 Comments

  1. My wife would divorce me if I gifted her with a car for the holidays. Seriously. Who does that??

    I will say the GMC commercial makes me laugh, though. It’s just so disgustingly pretentious. And why would modern-day yuppies with the income to purchase two vehicles outright choose GMCs? Really?

    1. The Sierra Denali at least makes sense – it’s not the choice for everyone, but the high end pickup certainly common enough in some of the nicer neighbourhoods near me. But yes, the Acadia is not being chosen over an RX/MDX/something German unless the family owns a GM dealer.

      1. well…..it appears they have a pretty rural McMansion. Perhaps the only dealer near them is a GMC dealer?

    2. They change to new model year vehicles every year, but I think they had a Yukon Denali and Sierra Denali last year. That’s like $150K worth of truck with a remarkably similar set of capabilities between them. They should do one next year with two non upfitted fleet spec Sierra 3500 chassis cabs.

  2. If you have the money to get cars without consulting your spouse, cars aren’t go to impress them as a gift and/or your spouse has no idea how much money you have.

    1. Depends, people get way too excited by a dealership throwing a big red bow on top of a car they’ve bought.

  3. Well, I have cried on a couple of virtual shoulders here lately about my mental challenges spending money on the car hobby, so this is way beyond my reality. I mean we could afford to buy new cars, but we just don’t consider it wise, and it would interfere with our plans for early retirement. And, as everyone else has said, discussing stuff like this with your spouse is kind of a minimum requirement in LivingTogether101. On the other hand, if you’re rich enough to just buy a new car or two for Christmas, go for something with charisma or personality, not a reliable SUV or what looks like a commercial truck and a bus with huge wheels.

    1. I personally like to hide my unusual automotive tastes behind the guise of frugality, but the rich really have no excuse for the dumb shit they choose to drive.

      1. Haha, there’s good sting in that. I check bringatrailer more or less daily, and it’s both entertaining and baffling. It’s lovely that people take care of old Porsches and Ferraris, but if I had the means…there are Simca, Facel Vega, Tatra, Cord and lots of lots of brands and design ideas that might not have prevailed, but that have charme, ingenuity and ambition baked into them in the most interesting ways. A 356 is the 1%ers F150, to my mind. But now we’re really a bit off track here…

    1. I don’t know what to tell you, Dave. That’s all it says, Delivery address: 90 degrees N; Contact there is Nick”

  4. The MiSSus was so mad at me, she actually contemplated breaking off our engagement because I bought a new truck without consulting her (again, engagement, not married, and my ’88 Silverado blew up, 6 hours away, in a time before cell phones, and I clearly had to have a vehicle, and …..ok, fine, I was probably in the wrong. Geez it was 25 years ago. Get off my back about it!)
    Anyways, I can’t imagine making any kind of large purchase without a consultation – even if it’s easily affordable.
    Didn’t Mahk rip on this idea too?

  5. We celebrate beater day, whenever opportunity arises, currently #1 son is in negotiations to acquire a $300 Corolla, and a rering kit from Rock Auto, to park next to his $400 Suburban. My ride is comparatively extravagant since my truck was $3k plus two rebuilt heads.

    1. Kinda curious how one can be “in negotiations” to acquire a $300 car, if those negotiations last long enough for a parental report.

      Seller: I want $300.
      #1 son: How about $200?
      Seller: No.
      #1 son: How about $200.01?
      Seller: No.
      #1 son: How about $200.02?
      Seller: No.
      #1 son: How about $200.03?
      Seller: No.
      #1 son: How about $200.04?
      Seller: No.
      …(later that day)…
      #1 son: How about $216.32?
      Seller: No.
      #1 son: How about $216.33?
      Seller: No.
      #1 son: Gee, I just looked at the clock. I need to get to bed. Can I call you in the morning?
      Seller: Sure

      1. As I understand it the issues are price of vehicle, price of parts and availability of space and money, plus whether the owner has a replacement car yet.

  6. I mean isn’t December to Remember just a sect of the much larger Toyotathon religion? They share a lot of the same Toyota New Global Architecture
    beliefs. Plus, the between the ideology of the 3.5L V6, to the sanctity of the 2.5L hybrid, they have a lot in common for sure.

  7. I could swear it was Jaguar that started the Surprise-your-wife-with-a-new-car-in-the-driveway-Christmas-morning ad campaign. It had a big red bow on it from about 1990? Anyone know? Or was it Lexus? I think Lexus was too young then and Jag was trying to stimulate sales. Anyone? Anyone? Buehler?

  8. ‘Twas the night before Christmas
    And I was out in the garage
    Trying to decide on some automotive triage –
    Should I fix my car or the Missus?

    The Subaru needed two head gaskets
    and F150 had shattered out a spark-plug
    The Mini’s blown turbo had turned it into a slug.
    Fix the Jimmy’s ABS light or just black-tape mask it?

    I’d just opened a new beer and my Chilton’s book as well
    When from up on the roof there came such a clatter
    I sprang up from my crawler to see what was the matter.
    Was that a Diesel engine I smelled?

    I left the garage and looked up to the sky
    And what to my wondering eyes did appear
    Was a giant bro truck with lots of cool off-road gear
    Natch, it was being driven by some big old drunk guy

    He’d slid to a stop on his giant mud tires
    He was sideways in that icy white snow,
    Even though he was obviously in 4 wheel low
    And, well, the night air smelled like a bad clutch when ya fry her.

    His truck window was open I and so I heard him shout
    Damn tuner! damn turbo! damn nox kit!, damn K&N!
    You’d think this bastard’d run right at least now and then!
    Then he rev’d up the engine and let that smoky clutch out!

    The truck went into to a quick spin right there up on that roof
    And so the loose stuff in the truck bed flew through air
    And so a new boxed up Holley carb nearly parted my hair!
    And this drunk he spun a few more circles, I think just for the goof.

    As he spun boxes flew out more and more!
    There were headers and cam shafts and new magnesium wheels
    The place looked like a giant Rock-Auto special closeout deal!
    The yard was just littered with boxes galore!

    He finally straightened out and drove off into the night
    Big air horns honking and led light bar ablaze
    But he soon disappeared in a coal-burner black haze
    It’s odd but on the nose of his truck I swear was a tiny red light.

    And that dear, is how I got all these cool new car parts
    And look! He remembered you as he was caperin’
    He brought you a “My Wife’s Hot!” really nice apron!
    Cause you too are real close to Santa’s big heart!

    As he finally upshifted and sped out of sight
    He was still shouting and cursing but I heard this real clear
    Enjoy it now cause no payments til January next year!

    Or I mean,

    Merry Christmas to all and to all a good night!

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