For The Same Price As A Kia Rio, You Could Have This

Find me a Kia with that much character.

We found this beautiful beast for sale on a Kia lot recently. Saying that it’s the nicest car on the lot was certainly an understatement. But let’s look a little closer.

Sure, it might take ten minutes to walk around it...

The car is listed for sale in good — but far from perfect — condition at $9500. The salesman says there is a minor leak surrounding the water pump, and there is evidence of a bit of bondo repair-work on the front fenders; so let’s say it needs a bit of work invested into it.
A Kia Rio starts at about C$15,900. For your fifteen grand, you get a tiny econobox that, let’s face it, will be disposable. In five years, you’ll throw it away, or give it to your niece, or try and sell it to that kid heading off to college who lives two blocks over.
Or, for the same price, you could buy this, and sink six grand into a new paint job and some engine work. The interior is in decent shape, but would eventually need a bit of refreshing. None of this is crucial, and much of the work could be done yourself with a bit of time and care. But more importantly, you’d have a car that, five years from now, you’d be even more proud of than you are on the day you buy it.
Doesn’t that seem like a better investment? Oh, and did we mention, it’s better for the environment too? Who would think that a huge, V8-engined land yacht like this could actually be better for the environment than a Rio? But it’s true. The Rio has to use resources from the planet to be manufactured. The Lincoln has already been manufactured, so the longer you keep it running, the kinder you are to your planet.
Love your planet. Save the Lincoln.


  1. Plus you won't have to pass half the stuff they require from newer cars in safety inspections AND you're saving money by being exempt from emission testing! How can you not love that!

  2. "Love your planet. Save the Lincoln."
    That just became my new Intensedebate (spoken with clenched teeth in a Kira Knightly style) description.

      1. Hey, it could be worse. At least it wasn't Clunked, although it wasn't eligible for that indignation. Yeah, I agree. Whoever put this fine purebreed in the pound deserves to drive a washing machine.

  3. I especially like the bit about doing much of the work yourself. As I get older, I find that the more affection I have for a vehicle, the more willing I am to work on it. With the Kia, I'd take more pride in being the one responsible for it being recycled into chinese refrigerators.

  4. Covered in snow, surrounded by unimaginative boxes with no visible cancer?! That's a true diamond in the rough. $9500 though is a bit much for my wallet though. I can dig it though.

  5. You know, that argument is the same one I used on my hippie roommate about ten years ago, defending the fact that I drive a truck built during the Johnson Administration. I took basically a lawn monument and got it back on the road using a rebuilt engine (recycled!). Shut the arrogant little bastard right up. Not too long ago the Tucson lefty throwaway weekly paper had a column calling all truck owners assholes, lumping lifted, overblown "'burb truck" and H2 owners in with people like me, scolding truck owners for not driving shitboxes instead. I was about to write a scathing letter outlining this argument, but figured they'd never print it, so I didn't bother. Screw 'em.

    1. Printing an article like that in Alberta would get you shot, and they'd never find your body.
      Mostly because none of the police would bother to look for it.

      1. Around here, I reckon we'd take a peaceful approach.
        And by "we", I don't mean "truck owners", who would probably write back and be applauded by much of the county. And I certainly don't mean "penis-compensating bro truck owners", who are likely to bash in your mailbox and throw their empty Bud cans in your driveway.
        But then you bash in their mailbox and life goes on. I respect the work truck.

  6. I would have thought that a Kia dealership was the last place to find a car such as this… in the fact that I don't understand how the buyer of this car would possibly now be shopping for a Kia. All I can come up with is that maybe the Lincoln was a daily driver for a grandparent who passed away, and some grandkid who then got the car now traded it in. At least that's what I want to believe, because thinking that someone traded this in for a Kia just kills me.
    Sadly, I'm not sure what owner this will go to either, but I'm hoping for the best.

    1. The dealer's website shows 7 cars older than I am – I'd wager the used car manager goes out of his way to find older stuff at the auctions, possibly to bring in different clients than an average Kia dealership. Then again, I don't know if there's anything to be interpreted from the stock numbers.

    1. West Edmonton Kia. Why, want it? I'd be happy to serve as a go-between. I might even be talked into a road trip to deliver it. 😉

  7. Looks like a 1957 Lincoln Capri. Yes, Capri – a name that's been kicked around like a stepchild at FoMoCo for decades.
    The Capri was introduced in 1952 to compete with Cadillac's flagship Series 62… but by 1956 was considered a downmarket "entry level" luxury car, and also available with 2-doors. Personally, I find the 4-door more attractive and interesting. Also the "downmarket" models to me look far more luxurious; the earlier models are almost dowdy and too sedate. But even though the downmarket pricing was successful in increasing sales, the last year for the Capri was 1959.
    You certainly don't see many of these in any condition. Personally I'm not generally a fan of stacked headlight Lincolns, but this one pulls it off better than the contemporary Premiere. It's a beautiful car! And should not be subjected to the indignity of Kia dealership.

      1. Oh no, I assure you that's a '57. '56-57 body style, and quads were first legal (in many places) for '57. (Everywhere in '58, which is why '57 Fords had single headlights and '58s had quads.) The '58-60 Lincoln/Continental was a hideous monstrosity with slanted headlights.
        I think this '57 is damn classy, but I'm not sure I'd take it over a two-light '56.

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