Welcome to Craigslist Crapshoot, our weekly search for the most bizarre, awesome, and/or terrible vehicles that the online classifieds has to offer.
Last week we looked for cars with the most outrageously bordello-like interiors. I was surprised how many of you knew, spot-on, what a cat house interior looked like, but that was only a momentary distraction once I saw all the luxuriant splendor on display. We’ll see who’s the most bordellicious in a sec, but first this week’s quest.
Hey, if you’re going to be running a house of ill repute then you’re most likely going to be dealing in cash. And if you’re dealing in cash, you’re going to need to protect yourself when you head to the bank, or where ever you keep that dough-rey-me. That’s why this week we want the best armored cars (actual cars or those Brinks Job trucks) you can find.
As always, we want your finds to go down in infamy and not in the site’s spam filter. Since we’ve changed commenting systems, you may need to update your commenter account. Make sure you have a Disqus account – they’re free and easy to get – and then comment away.
To be honest with you, seeing all that tufted velour and leather, my first instinct wasn’t playtime, but nap time. I really want to curl up in the back seat of the ’78 Lincoln MkV found by Manic_King and saw some logs. Two years newer but equally pillow-tastic was the Olds 98 Regency that OA5599 came across. I’m getting sleepy just looking at it, even in its red light district hue.
Of course you don’t want to be sleeping while you’re driving, in fact you want as few distractions as possible when you’re behind the wheel. That’s probably why this 1975 Cadillac Fleetwood Brougham has so few miles on it (29,000) as its all-original interior is so pimptastic that it’s hugely distracting. Located by Manic_King as well, it takes the cake for the most bordello-like (albeit tacky) interior.
Thank you all for playing, and congrats to Manic_King for the win.
This Shorland is still available, will trade for backhoe.
http://images.craigslist.org/00p0p_gvHLegtFzjX_600x450.jpg
http://seattle.craigslist.org/oly/cto/5508717492.html
Non running Ford powered GMC
http://phoenix.craigslist.org/evl/cto/5478709590.html?lang=es&cc=mx
http://images.craigslist.org/00W0W_6CEPFDsgmqE_600x450.jpg
I wonder if all the places covered in body filler are from getting shot. That would make it way cooler.
The ad says the windows have been replaced. Maybe used for target practice.
I think you mean NOT powered by GMC.
Technically, not powered by Ford.
Does this count? It has “ballistic door panels,” which sounded like CL-style sales puffery to me. But then I found a pdf of Dodge police car options.
http://elmira.craigslist.org/cto/5533110723.html
https://secure.pic.autoscout24.net/images-big/075/488/0270488075001.jpg?e588e839f26725dca2d57a45089199c6
One-off Lancia Delta Integrale Evoluzione previously owned by a certain Leopoldo Pirelli, at the time CEO of his namesake tire company.
https://www.autoscout24.com/offers/-270488075
Wow, fantastic. Who would this have been designed to fend off? By 1991, the Brigate Rosse had been defunct for three years.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Red_Brigades
Michelin, Continental, etcetera.
Pretty legit, and only $6k!
For sale or trade armored 1997 BMW 750 il Mex 106,XXX Km.
“The cost of the car at the time was $460, 980.00 from which $149,680 for the unit and $311,300 for the armor.”
Dude, where’s my link?
http://austin.craigslist.org/cto/5497686375.html
Danke.
You’d have better luck importing it into Canada, since it’s over 15 years old (but not yet 25, bummer for Americans).
There are some available on US Craigslist. They are droolworthy.
Of course you *might* be pursued by angry Mexican drug lords mistaking you for the previous owner. Or get caught by narco-dogs because they forgot to empty out that one hidden compartment…
What your grandfather thinks of when he hears the words, “mobile banking”.
http://www.ebay.com/itm/2005-Ford-Other-E-450-Super-/331824391225?_trksid=p2141725.m3641.l6368
On the Tijuana Craigslist is this armored Avalanche. I wonder if the plastic cladding becomes part of the armor?
http://tijuana.craigslist.com.mx/cto/5533968471.html
And it’s not the rare 2500 version? Weird.
All the Gold in California
Is in a bank in the middle of
Beverly Hills…In Somebody elses name.
In unrelated Craigslist news, the asking price for this tribute to the power of positive scrub radius has come down from $4000 to $2500. Yes, I’m still watching.
http://images.craigslist.org/00w0w_co1nZW3X6dr_600x450.jpg
http://seattle.craigslist.org/kit/cto/5468853160.html
http://hooniverse.info/2016/03/08/axle-pivoting-propane-fueled-nailhead-powered-dune-buggy-thing-breaks-barriers-in-wtfery/
Just to prove that you can have an armoured car, and still look stylish as hell:
http://www.taurisano.it/LANCIA_Thesis_PROTECTA_B6_3_2_V6_24V_aut_Euro_4_Emblema/automobile-marino-1346841.htm
Here’s a German Sonderwagen 2 rolling shell. The downsides: It’s literally a rolling shell, it’s in bad condition and nothing really works. The upsides: It still has the gun turret on it, it comes with an entire pile of loose parts, and most importantly it’s only three grand! Not thirty, THREE!
http://ww3.autoscout24.de/classified/287042780
Here’s a German Sonderwagen 2 rolling shell. The downsides: It’s
literally a rusty rolling shell, I can’t see anything in it apart from a steering wheel. The upsides: It still has the gun turret on it, it comes with an
entire pile of loose parts, and most importantly it’s only three grand!
Not thirty, THREE!
http://ww3.autoscout24.de/classified/287042780
Here’s a German Sonderwagen 2 rolling shell. The downsides: It’s literally a rusty rolling shell, I can’t even see anything in it apart from a steering wheel. The upsides: It still has the gun turret on it, it comes with an entire pile of loose parts, and most importantly it’s only three grand!
Not thirty, THREE!
http://ww3.autoscout24.de/classified/287042780
Get it going and…
No more parking troubles!
Collin/Denton/Grayson Tx new residents…ask some old-timers about ” April”s , Michell’s (sic) or the “Hot Tub Club” Sure to get a rueful grin or a blast of fire n brimstone….but they all knew where the bordello was……