Craigslist Crapshoot

The World’s Worst Car Is For Sale On Craigslist
Welcome to Craigslist Crapshoot, our weekly search for the most bizarre, awesome, and/or terrible vehicles that the online classifieds has to offer. 
Okay, I’m now ready to get my fall on. That’s because you all provided a marvelous mix of convertibles that I, and a close cadre of friends, can potentially take to view the trees changing color, take in the smells of roadside pie stand offerings, and generally cause one to wonder if life could get any better. We’ll start that road trip in just a sec, but first I know you’re itching to once again dive into the classifieds so we need this week’s quest.
Do you remember High School? And I extend that question especially to those of you who are presently in High School as it’s probably something you block out come 3:30 each weekday. One thing’s for sure, and that is that High School is a microcosm of real life, with all the interactions and intersections you would expect, only with people who have raging hormones and only the threat of Juvie to keep them from doing extraordinarily terrible things.
It’s also a world of status and cliques and one of the most important status symbols is the car you drive, and that’s why this week we want to find the coolest cars under $2,000 a High Schooler could buy. What’s going to impress, and what’s going to not get giant penises spray painted on it after every football game?
As always, we want your finds to go down in infamy and not in the site’s spam filter. Since we’ve changed commenting systems, you may need to update your commenter account. Make sure you have a Disqus account – they’re free and easy to get – and then comment away.

Got that? Good, now drop our tops.

I first started thinking about last week’s quest when Pink Moon by dead folk-you singer Nick Drake rolled around on my iPhone’s playlist. That was the song used in Volkswagen’s moody ad for the Golf Cabriolet a decade or so back, and that made me think about taking a fall trip in a top down car. Add to that having watched A Few Good Pie Places on PBS and I’m lacing up my driving gloves and slipping into my Pilotis.
You all provided a cornucopia of great options for a sun-dappled drive, and while a few were fright pigs, the Swedes came through with a couple of top-notch options that while perhaps in need of a little lovin,’ were priced right for an impromptu purchase. Both this Saab, found by PotbellyJoe, and this Volvo, uncovered by 1977ChevyTruck are a pittance, and potentially could be sold for the same asking come next spring.
Even cheaper, and even closer to that VW ad in actual metal and a musical connection, is thisGermany-located 1997 Rolling Stone Edition VW Golf Cabrio, discovered by ManicKing. At only 550€ and sporting what look to be an extra set of BBS wheels, this is what I think I’d like to drive to watch the leaves turn, see the sun set, or just discover some new place to get some good pie.
Congrats to ManicKing, and thank you all for the excellent offerings. Now, let’s go back to school.


      1. This is important as the student parking lot of my school often looked more like county fair bumper cars and not so much the semi-coordinated chaos of most parking lots.

    1. Easy to fix, room for all of your friends and cool in only the way an old gunboat Buick can be. An excellent choice.

    2. Ah…memories. I rode on my Grandma’s lap in the front seat of one of these for years….we didn’t believe in seat belts or car seats back then…..

    3. Excellent find. My high school beater was Grampa’s ’68 Belair 4 door post. Roughly the same size and condition. Sadly instead of this beautiful hue, mine was cream with rust colored accents.

    4. Actually, the schnoz on this one isn’t beat in at the prow, which is very unusual, so while it fully qualifies for hooptie status, damn, that’s a good find.

      1. I like your comment… but playing devil’s advocate, was it a “brand new” engine, or did the car just get “another” engine? Perhaps the first lasted 150,000, and was replaced with one that had 80,000 on it already.

    1998 Jeep Cherokee – $1700 (Bound Brook)
    1998 Jeep Cherokee , white, gray interior, 6 cyl engine, auto trans. It has the police package, certified speedometer,ext idle switch,rubber matting, HD skid plates, 3inch lift kit,31 inch tires, recent brakes, remote starter, new battery. The jeep has 126,000 miles and 2016 inspection. It will need a neutral safety switch, possibly a starter,A/C compressor and has a minor power steering leak. The jeep runs ok. Ideal for jeep lover…… Well worth $1700.00
    So it has what it needs and it has a few projects for your kid to start working on right away. It is a vehicle that gives them something worth driving now and gets them comfortable with working on their own car.
    It’s basically a HS Internship as a mechanic.

      1. Why stop there? Just find a 318 and call it a day.
        Then make a month out of getting everything to work. No different than regular XJ ownership.

    1. Trust me, as a male who had a long-wheelbase FC ’67 Dodge passenger van in ’85-’86, my junior & senior HS years, this makes parents more nervous than you think.

  2. Also, what kind of High School is this? I mean I went to a few schools that a $2000 car is nice compared to the parking lot and then i graduated from a place where new $25k cars were the norm for the school lot.
    If you’re the poor kid at the catholic school thanks to an athletics scholarship and you need a car… Consider this:
    Maybe then people will just think it’s you grandparents who have money.

      1. It’s a fake ad. Reverse image search turns up nothing, but a Google search on the listed VIN reveals the same ad verbatim on San Diego craigslist [flagged for removal] and a completed ebay auction from Virginia that ended 2 weeks ago for $6410.

    1. A (admittedly very nice) Milano sold for more than 10x this on eBay in the past week. 164s are at the bottom of the curve. This is your opportunity to get in on the ground floor of a very solid investment.

  3. When I was in that situation, I came so close to buying a six cylindre Datsun build with unobtainium parts. Bought the Volvos I liked since I was a kid, and they were very kind to me. Today, I’d probably be a tad more wrench-willing, with the internet available as an all-knowing encyclopedia. Therefore:
    1989 Ssangyong Koriando, 1570$:
    1982 Lada 1200, 1200$:$_1.JPG
    2007 Lada 1118, 892$ (imagine the wings the rest of the money could buy!):$_1.JPG
    1969 GAZ 21, 733$ (which is actually a great deal; car comes with a lot of spare parts):

    1. Do today’s kids even know who Vanilla Ice is? I mean, a kid looking for their first car right now was born after The Slim Shady EP came out, and long after Mr. Van Winkle’s 15 minutes were up.

    With only 71k and an $1800 asking price, I’d actually want this for myself, if I had anywhere to put it. And, I’m sure the kid that wants a Benz this old for their first car probably wants a diesel, but I mean, it’s still sort of cool, right?

    1. Only problem, I think 1993 was part of the biodegradable wiring years. I had a ’95 E320…excellent car, had to rename myself Baby Beater Benz, and while reverse still doesn’t work, this is not an impediment to my 30 year old stepson.
      In fact, the house we bought in 2010 was influenced by whether or not I could get in/out of the garage with no reverse.

  5. As a current high schooler, I bought a 1990 Ford Taurus SHO for $1600 a year ago.

    Of course it cost another $1500 to get it to past inspection…

        1. HA HA thanks 1977ChevyTruck – very close indeed.
          I used to smoke cigs also ( why not, we grew 3 acres of tobacco back then )

      1. I tried to find a 1973 R60/5 toaster BMW for sale ( since I drove it to school as well )
        but there are none of those no where under 2K anymore.

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