Our good Friend Of Hooniverse Jeremy, aka damnElantra, posted this on his FaceBork page a few minutes ago, and I immediately fell in love with it. Much like an earlier Mercedes van someone posted that I finally — finally — got talked out of by cooler heads prevailing, I immediately developed a soft spot for this rusted old hulk of a van. But why?
I know my personal reasons; when I was a wee lad, growing up in the thin mountain air — and probably therefore stunting my mental development somehow — my father bought an old VW bus for the sole purpose of going camping. Now, in his case, this may not have been the best move in the world, because my sister and I didn’t always get along that well, particularly on long road trips, and he was not exactly renowned for his patience. He was, however, renowned for his frequent and powerful headaches, and for having a touch of a temper; my sister, meanwhile, was renowned for her ability to intentionally annoy everyone in the vehicle, and I was renowned for complaining about her. Add all these ingredients together in a very small container, shake generously, add a great deal of heat and an underpowered engine, and allow to simmer for several hours at a time, or until roof explodes off.
Strangely, despite this horrible-sounding setup, I actually miss camping with my family. I’ve thought several times about how it would be nice to get a small trailer, or an in-bed camper, or something similarly utilitarian, but I keep coming back to one point: Where’s the fun in that?
Look, anyone can go out to an RV dealership, sign some papers, give (or promise) them some money, and drive away with an RV of some sort. But it’s a whole hell of a lot cooler if you pull into a campsite with a vintage car, truck, or van that has been appropriately converted, and customized for the purposes of keeping you safe and warm while you sleep in the middle of a forest. Sure, you can do this with a tent, but Canada has a whole lot of wild things that like to go rummaging around in the middle of the night: bears, meese, foxen, wolves, frat-boys… all are likely to try and get into your tent while you sleep, and as such, it’s much safer to have a vehicle to sleep inside. A vehicle like, say, this one!
I fear it might be a little short for my purposes. While not quite up to Braff’s gigantic scale, I’m still quite tall, so I need something with a sleeping section that will accomodate me, and would hopefully have enough space left over for a counter on which I can set a coffee-maker, and some place where I can store a decently-sized beer fridge.
So clearly, this isn’t quite right for me, but yet irrationally, I still want it. It’s got such a neat look to it, I keep finding myself tempted by the “BID NOW” button. So help me out, Hoons! If you suddenly ended up with this van in your driveway, what outlandish project would you create with it?
[Thanks to damnElantra, for the inspiration! The original eBay ad is here.]