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Classic Captions – The 1971 Ford Maverick Grabber Edition

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Welcome to the Hooniverse Classic Captions Post, and it’s that time of the week in which this feature appears, so let’s review the premise; I search for images that were used by the car companies in their print advertising, dealer displays or brochures, and it is your job to provide a humorous caption that is some how tied in with the image. This week we have an image of <1>a Maverick in Action, but we will get to that in a moment… But first, with our commenting system that has gone awry, I am expecting participation levels to be way off… So please be patient and have fun with this feature anyway.

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Last time we had an image of a Couple of Love Bugs , and the participation rate was awful, even before the problems with the commenting system, so let’s review last week’s entries. Our runner up comment was from $kaycog, and she used a current book title to make fun of the colorful beetles: “Fifty Shades of Grey” is child’s play for Dick and Jane.” I really have no idea how popular that book really is, or the Movie for that matter, but it was a funny comment…

But the winner for this week is Batshitbox (Yes, once again) and his caption went like this: “VW knew that kisses were horizontally opposed, air cooled, and best at low speeds.” That was very well played, so congratulations Batshitbox on winning this weeks Classic Caption Contest.

It’s now time to take a look at this weeks entry, and once again I dive into the Flickr Account of coconv. This ad is for the 1971 Ford Maverick Grabber (one of my Obscure Muscle Cars…) The image shows a beautiful young couple in Scuba Gear standing next to a lake or the shore. I have no idea as to what the advertising department was going for with this particular image, but the tag line (that I kept in the picture on purpose) states “and a little more jazz”. While I like the 1970’s imagery, and use it quite often here on the Classic Caption Postings, I’m still stumped as to what this is suppose to say to potential customers. Was it Young and Hip? Was it daring? Was it just lame? Why don’t you try and come up with a great tag line of your own, and see if you can make sense of this ad image. (You can see a larger image by clicking here)

You have the next five days to come up with a great caption. The editors will deliberate on the merits of each entry, and after contemplating our own caption, and we will pronounce a winner. So, get to work and create you’re own caption for this very puzzling image.

Photo Credit: Coconv Flickr Photostream

Classic Captions – The 1974 Volkswagen Beetle “Love Bug” Edition

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Welcome to the Hooniverse Classic Captions Post, and it’s that time of the week in which this feature appears, so let’s review the premise; I search for images that were used by the car companies in their print advertising, dealer displays or brochures, and it is your job to provide a humorous caption that is some how tied in with the image. St. Valentine’s Day was celebrated this past weekend here in the states, and I remembered that at one time Volkswagen referred to a Special Edition of the Beetle as the “Love Bug”, but we will get to that in a moment…

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Last time we had an image of an Oldsmobile down by the River, and the participation rate was just OK, so let’s review last week’s entries. Our runner up comment was from Irishzombieman☆ (Yes, Again), but this time it bordered on the bizarre: “‘Twere bananas she’d demanded today and so Teddy, now, was driving like the wind–and not just a gentle breeze, mind you, but a gyot-danged sirocco, or a zonda–on a damned-fool errand in the general direction of a town whose presence they were able to divine from a towering and persistent pillar of oil smoke somewhat east of north.
It was upon this beacon that his eyes were fixed when he rounded the corner alongside the creek. The brightness of the otherwise-overcast sky was dazzling and his eyes, for a moment, saw only shadows as they returned to the road before him. Then the miracle of aperture and iris did their trick and four guys magically appeared like rabbits from top hats.
Teddy had time to think the word “fish” before he jerked the wheel and the world began tumbling violently for what seemed like an hour but was probably more like three seconds. Then it all stopped and Teddy saw, just up the road a piece, something yellowish, something longish.
“Bananas,” he said out loud. The world went dark, and the sound of a woodpecker filled the air.”
… It was so bizarre that PotbellyJoe ★★★★★ added the Gif you see above to the comment…

Speaking of PotbellyJoe ★★★★★, he was the winner of this week’s Caption Contest with something short, and to the point: “Seen here: A Royale with Cheese.” Congratulations PotbellyJoe ★★★★★ on winning this weeks Classic Caption Contest.

It’s now time to take a look at this weeks entry, and once again I dive into the Flickr Account of Alden Jewell. This ad is for the 1974 Volkswagen “Love Bug” Edition (to celebrate St. Valentines Day). This is a rather interesting image that highlights one of the Special Edition Beetle Sedans during the twilight period before they were no longer offered here in the states. They were offered in two distinct shades, Red Hot Red, and Luscious Lime Green. This was also the start of imports offering “Black” trim instead of Chrome, and I wasn’t a fan of that then, and I’m still not. You see the two love birds kissing, but really… what is the point of this image besides enhancing the image of the VW Love Bug… (You can see a larger image by clicking here)

You have the next five days to come up with a great caption. The editors will deliberate on the merits of each entry, and after contemplating our own caption, and we will pronounce a winner. So, get to work and create you’re own caption for this very Spring Like image.

Photo Credit: Alden Jewell’s Flickr Photostream

Classic Captions – The 1978 Oldsmobile Delta 88 Royale Edition

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Welcome to the Hooniverse Classic Captions Post, and it’s that time of the week in which this feature appears, so let’s review the premise; I search for images that were used by the car companies in their print advertising, dealer displays or brochures, and it is your job to provide a humorous caption that is some how tied in with the image. Do you remember the days in which you didn’t have to own a Pickup Truck or SUV to enjoy the Great Outdoors? Neither can I, but apparently there was a time in which that happened, but we will get to that in a moment…
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Last time we had an image of a Hoser with his Plymouth, and the participation rate was just a bit better, so I guess using vintage advertising isn’t really the problem, so let’s review last week’s entries. Our runner up comment was from relative newcomer neight428, and it was a take off of a Canadian Theme: “All you hosers go visit your local Ontario Plymouth Dealer to check out the latest models, eh?” That was a very good try, but there was one caption that you all liked a bit better…

And the winning comment was from one of our regulars, Irishzombieman☆, and it was one of those classic Photoshop Images that pop up every once in a while. You can enlarge the image by clicking here, and make sure you drink in all the detail. Congratulations Irishzombieman☆ on winning this weeks Classic Caption Contest.

It’s now time to take a look at this weeks entry, and once again I dive into the Flickr Account of Alden Jewell. This ad is for the 1978 Oldsmobile Delta 88 Royale 2-Door Sedan with four guys on a Fishing Trip (Imagine that, without a big old SUV…) When you look at this image, what do you think is the story behind the guys Fishing Getaway? Where are they going to put their catch (admittedly, it is a rather small catch, but I’m just saying…) And where did they stay for the night in the first place? At least this was a proper Oldsmobile Image, because it was in fact your Fathers Oldsmobile… (You can see a larger image by clicking here)

You have the next five days to come up with a great caption. The editors will deliberate on the merits of each entry, and after contemplating our own caption, and we will pronounce a winner. So, get to work and create you’re own caption for this very Spring Like image.

Photo Credit: Alden Jewell’s Flickr Photostream

Classic Captions – The 1957 Plymouth Belvedere Edition

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Welcome to the Hooniverse Classic Captions Post, and it’s that time of the week in which this feature appears, so let’s review the premise; I search for images that were used by the car companies in their print advertising, dealer displays or brochures, and it is your job to provide a humorous caption that is some how tied in with the image. I’m starting to get sick of Winter, so I thought I would brighten things up a bit, but we will get to that in a moment…

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Last time we had an image of a Chrysler on a Ski Slope, and the participation rate was awful, and I wonder if it because I’m using vintage images… anyway, let’s review last week’s entries. Our runner up comment came from one of our regulars, PotbellyJoe ★★★★★, and it was a little on the weird side: “Shit, it’s your crazy aunt, she must have been following us. Damn, why did I have to buy such a unique vehicle. Get low, get low Susie. We’ll have to ski our way to safety.” See what I mean by weird? But there was one caption that you all liked a bit better…

And the winning comment was from one of our regulars, smalleyxb122, and he tried to remind us of another Chrysler Product: “…and she began to wonder what it would be like if her Chrysler had skis. She approached the people at Chrysler with the idea, and it was dismissed as purely a flight of fancy.

Seven years later, when Chrysler introduced the Sno Runner, she remembered the thought, and brought suit against the automaker. They reached a settlement entitling her to a percentage of the profits.

She thought a share of the profits was fair enough, until she found out that the Sno Runner was sold at a loss, and with each sale, she owed Chrysler two dollars and some change as her share of the negative profits.

Mercifully, the Sno Runner was only sold for 4 years, but legend has it that Nancy still owed Chrysler fourteen dollars at the time of her death in 1986.”
The Chrysler Sno-Runner has been featured here on the Hooniverse Before, and you can read about it here. Thanks for reminding us smalleyxb122 and congratulations on winning this week’s Caption Contest.

It’s now time to take a look at this weeks entry, and once again I dive into the Flickr Account of Alden Jewell. This ad is for the 1957 Plymouth with the guy telling the audience that he is no millionaire, but the Plymouth is his. This was part of the infamous Plymouth Tag Line when these cars were introduced exclaiming “Suddenly, it’s 1960!” One thing I have noticed with this particular ad image is that if you take the car away, it really doesn’t look dated. Yes, I think this particular advertisement was perfect for the period, and I really think it was a great way to sell a relatively mundane sedan… So, would you have ever thought of a more appropriate tag line? (You can see the full ad here)

You have the next five days to come up with a great caption. The editors will deliberate on the merits of each entry, and after contemplating our own caption, and we will pronounce a winner. So, get to work and create you’re own caption for this very appropriate image.

Photo Credit: Alden Jewell’s Flickr Photostream

Classic Captions – The 1961 Chrysler Newport 4-Door Hardtop Edition

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Welcome to the Hooniverse Classic Captions Post, and it’s that time of the week in which this feature appears, so let’s review the premise; I search for images that were used by the car companies in their print advertising, dealer displays or brochures, and it is your job to provide a humorous caption that is some how tied in with the image. New England is about to get a major Blizzard, and I thought I would celebrate this occasion with a Winter Scene, but we will get to that in a moment…

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Last time we had an image of a Breezeway Mercury with the retractable window, and the participation rate was less than stellar… I swear, the images I think are going to pop seem to just fizzle… so let’s review last week’s entries. Our runner up comment came from one of our regulars, P161911, and it was a different take on why you might open up the back window… “Taco night is much better now with the new Mercury Breezeway.” That was one of the funniest comments all year P161911, but there was one caption that our readers liked a little bit better…

And the winning comment was from a relative new-comer to these parts, 1977chevytruck, and he tied in smoke to something British… “A window to let smoke out? You would think the British would have though of that first. Alas, the cause of the smoke would probably prevent the window from working anyway…” Ah yes, the old reliability of British Electrics… Not very Topical, but very funny none the less, so congratulations 1977chevytruck on winning this week’s Caption Contest.

It’s now time to take a look at this weeks entry, and I can’t seem to find ot where I found this image in the first place, though you can purchase the advertisement here. This is a Winter Scene featuring the 1961 Chrysler Newport 4-Door Hardtop, and I thought it was appropriate for the Blizzard of 2015 we are experiencing here in the Northeast right now… This ad is very retro in its feel as far as winter sports goes, with none of the nylon and other man-made fabrics on the models that seems to be a staple of every ski resort across the country. Yes, I think this particular advertisement was perfect for the period, and I really think it was a great way to sell a relatively mundane sedan… So, how would you have arranged the shoot to look even more appropriate?

You have the next five days to come up with a great caption. The editors will deliberate on the merits of each entry, and after contemplating our own caption (Lucy’s ski lesson… Day One), and we will pronounce a winner. So, get to work and create you’re own caption for this very appropriate image.

Photo Credit: Vintage Adventurers

Classic Captions – The 1963 Mercury Monterey Custom Breezeway Hardtop Edition

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Welcome to the Hooniverse Classic Captions Post, and it’s that time of the week in which this feature appears, so let’s review the premise; I search for images that were used by the car companies in their print advertising, dealer displays or brochures, and it is your job to provide a humorous caption that is some how tied in with the image. I’m going to get a little nostalgic with this week’s image, which has quite a bit of a Mad Men Vibe to it, but we will take care of that in a moment

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Last time we had an image of a Buick Wagon on a Ski Slope, and we seem to be steady as far as participation goes… so let’s review last week’s entries. Our runner up comment came from one of our regulars, Batshitbox, and it makes you think a bit… “I told you I was a mogul in the automobile industry!”That was very clever Batshitbox, but there was one caption that our readers like a little bit better…

And the winning comment was from another one of our regular readers, mdharrell. You know, at one time I used to have a Key Case, and this hit rather close to home… “Yes, we all agree a white key case to match the car was a perfectly sensible choice. The point is the keys are on that slope somewhere, so let’s go look again. It’ll be getting dark soon.” How many of you remember Key Cases in the first place? This was not only topical, but very retro, so congratulations mdharrell on winning this week’s Caption Contest.

It’s now time to take a look at this weeks entry, and I decided to use another image from Alden Jewell’s Flickr Account, and decided to use this one for the 1963 Mercury Monterrey Breezeway Hardtop. This has that early 60’s Mad Men vibe to it, when smoking was not only acceptable, but encouraged. And what a great idea for a sedan in the first place, with the rear window that actually retracted a few inches to let stale air out, or to help in ventilation. With this feature, the Mercury stood apart from it’s Ford sibling, much more so than any other time before the Mercury Brand was killed off. Yes, I think this particular advertisement was compelling during this time period… Hell, I want one today. But what do you think the conversation was like within the Sedan between the occupants? (You can click here to see the full size image)

You have the next five days to come up with a great caption. The editors will deliberate on the merits of each entry, and after contemplating our own caption (So my dear, may I have one of your cigarettes per chance?), and we will pronounce a winner. So, get to work and create you’re own caption for this very interesting image.

Photo Credit: Alden Jewell’s Flickr Photostream

Classic Captions – The 1963 Buick LeSabre Estate Wagon Edition

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Welcome to the Hooniverse Classic Captions Post, and it’s that time of the week in which this feature appears, so let’s review the premise; I search for images that were used by the car companies in their print advertising, dealer displays or brochures, and it is your job to provide a humorous caption that is some how tied in with the image. Looking at the calendar (and a quick peek outside) it looks like we are currently in the middle of another winter season, and the image of a Buick Wagon illustrates all the fun you can have this time of year, but we will get to that in a moment…

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Last time we had an image of a Malaise Era Mustang II King Cobra, and the participation rate was just OK, so let’s see if we can kick it up a notch, as this post is running a bit later than usual because of the Detroit Show Coverage. Our runner up comment came from one of our regulars, GTXcellent, and it was most excellent indeed: “Tails, I win – ha ha, you have to pilot this horrible, under-powered, fiery death trap.” “Well, that’s fine. But next time, I get to fly the autogyro.” That was very clever GTXcellent, but there was one caption that our readers like a little bit better…

And the winning comment was from another one of our regular readers, onrails. His caption was similar to GTXcellent’s caption (in fact, most of the other favorites were expressing nearly the same observations), but it went like this: “Listen – we BOTH had the same pile of leftover parts to work from, I just decided to make something that was attractive, fun, and useful. You’ll just have to take the car that you made.” This was also very clever onrails, so good job on winning this week’s Caption Contest.

It’s now time to take a look at this weeks entry, and I’ve raided an image from Alden Jewell’s Flickr Account, and decided upon this image for the 1963 Buick LeSabre Estate Wagon. This was the time before GM used faux wood paneling for their wagons (that changed for the 1966 model year in which Chevrolet introduced the Caprice Wagon with Woodgrain to compete with the Ford Country Squire) and is actually a fine looking vehicle. One has to question why the Buick is on the ski slope in the first place. Is that handsome shi instructor giving private lessons to the trio of beautiful women, or is he trying to get a date with at least one of them? Is this really the way to sell a top rung luxury wagon in the 60’s? (You can click here to see the full size image)

You have the next five days to come up with a great caption. The editors will deliberate on the merits of each entry, and after contemplating our own caption (So, who needs a private ski lesson back at the lodge?), and we will pronounce a winner. So, get to work and create you’re own caption for this very interesting image.

Photo Credit: Alden Jewell’s Flickr Photostream

Classic Captions – The 1978 Ford Mustang II King Cobra Edition

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Welcome to the Hooniverse Classic Captions Post, and it’s that time of the week in which this feature appears, so let’s review the premise; I search for images that were used by the car companies in their print advertising, dealer displays or brochures, and it is your job to provide a humorous caption that is some how tied in with the image. There was a time in which the Mustang shared components with the Ford Pinto, and the featured car was no different, but we will get to that in a moment…

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Last time we had an image of a Rambler Rouge in a Garage, and the participation rate was a little bit better this time, so I think I’ll keep this feature for a little longer… Our runner up caption was from one of our long time readers skitter, and he was still wrapped in within the Holiday Spirit: “After the kids were finally asleep, Mom, Dad, and Uncle Dave had to stay up to put all the Christmas presents together and under the tree.” That was very clever skitter, but there was one caption that our readers like a little bit better…

And the winning comment was from another one of our regular readers, Devin. His interesting caption went like this: “The end of the French New Wave movement is difficult to pin down, but many critics agree it’s marked by Godard’s poorly received film “2 or 3 Things I Fixed on Her Car.”” Ah the French New Wave Movement in Cinema, something I never really understood, which makes this caption so delightful, so good job Devin on winning this week’s Caption Contest.

It’s now time to take a look at this weeks entry, and I decided to once again use an image from Alden Jewell’s Flickr Account, and I found this image for the 1978 Ford King Cobra. This would be the final year for the Ford Mustang II, as a new Fairmont Based Mustang was set to debut for the 1979 Model Year. This King Cobra was the pinnacle of wretched excess for the Mustang II, with nothing that quite fit together cohesively. It has the forward rake grill opening, with an ultra deep front air dam, the graphics were utterly pointless, the Alloy Wheels were a version of the Mustang II Ghia Lace Alloys, and it sports a 5.0L Decal on the faux hood scoop. That 5.0L V-8 was a 2bbl unit that developed a meager 122hp! So, does this racy Mustang II look the part (a part of what I don’t know…) and does this image make you want to go out and find one of these for your own? (You can click here to see the full size image)

You have the next five days to come up with a great caption. The editors will deliberate on the merits of each entry, and after contemplating our own caption (So, why is there a Mad Max Vibe to this image?), and we will pronounce a winner. So, get to work and create you’re own caption for this very unusual image.

Photo Credit: Alden Jewell’s Flickr Photostream

Classic Captions – The 1967 Rambler Rogue V-8 Edition

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Welcome to the Hooniverse Classic Captions Post, and it’s that time of the week in which this feature appears, so let’s review the premise; I search for images that were used by the car companies in their print advertising, dealer displays or brochures, and it is your job to provide a humorous caption that is some how tied in with the image. We are getting close to closing out 2014, so let’s celebrate with this Classic Rambler, but we will get to that in a moment…

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Last time we had an image of a New Yorker Fifth Avenue, and the participation rate was a little bit better this time, so it’s on to the New Year… Our runner up caption was from one of our long time readers Devin, and he channeled the 24-Hours-of-LeMons with his comment: “And dude, it was only $450! We’re sure to win the Index of Effluency in this thing!” Yes, once again, it was the track experience with bangers that was used effectively, but there was one caption that our readers like a little bit better…

And the winning comment was from another one of our regular readers, and for the second week in a row, PotbellyJoe ★★★★★ (Now with five stars!). His interesting caption went like this: “The Chrysler New Yorker, for people who have hit everything but the lottery.” This was quite funny, so good job PotbellyJoe ★★★★★ on winning this week’s Caption Contest (Again…)

It’s now time to take a look at this weeks entry, and once again I used an image from Alden Jewell’s Flickr Account, and found this image for the 1967 Rambler Rogue. Did you know by 1967 you could equip the lowly Rambler American with a 343 Cubic Inch V-8 producing 280HP, on regular pump gas? This was the Hurst SC/Rambler before it was ever known that way, and what a little screamer it must have been. Looking at the ad copy, we find out that there was a mandatory option of the 4-Speed stick when you ordered the fire breathing V-8. The ad goes on to say that there were other options to consider, like a special handling package, Twin-Grip rear axle, Tachometer, Disc Brakes, and wider tires. What is really interesting is that you could get this engine in ANY Rambler American, like the Rogue Two-Door Hardtop, Plane Jane 2-Door Sedan, Roomy 4-Door Sedan, and don’t forget the Wagon… The only problem with this ad is the image itself, as the Rambler Production Line in Kenosha, Wisconsin was equally dark and depressing. With a better image, the ad would have worked better, at least that’s what I think. How about you? (You can click here to see the full size image)

You have the next five days to come up with a great caption. The editors will deliberate on the merits of each entry, and after contemplating our own caption (like what the hell are they doing with that Rambler in the first place…), and we will pronounce a winner. So, get to work and create you’re own caption for this very unusual image.

Photo Credit: Alden Jewell’s Flickr Photostream

Classic Captions – The 1990 Chrysler New Yorker Fifth Avenue Edition

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Welcome to the Hooniverse Classic Captions Post, and it’s that time of the week in which this feature appears, so let’s review the premise; I search for images that were used by the car companies in their print advertising, dealer displays or brochures, and it is your job to provide a humorous caption that is some how tied in with the image. This is Christmas Week, and everyone is getting dressed up in their finest to go out and have a good time, which fits in nicely with this image from 1990, but we will get back to this in a moment…

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Last time we had an image of a Devilish GMC Pickup, and the participation rate was not what I expected, which means it must be the holidays… Our runner up caption was from one of our long time readers mdharrell, and was remembering a simpler time from his past… “Looking back, I remember the original pony cars, and those early Goats, and when it was normal to have a four-pot under the hood. Those were good times. Now it’s like everything’s gone to the Dev… Huh.” That was well done Professor, but there was one that our readers like a little bit better…

And the winning comment was from another one of our regular readers, PotbellyJoe ★★★★★ (Now with five stars!), and the caption went like this: “As he got out of the Diablo for the press shoot, Timmy saw he was surrounded by horses and realized what happened. It was about to get really weird for his co-workers at the Cabellero shoot.” Somehow, this caption was a bit off for me personally, but so what… Good Job PotbellyJoe ★★★★★ on winning this week’s Caption Contest.

It’s now time to take a look at this weeks entry, and once again I used an image from Alden Jewell’s Flickr Account, and found this image for the 1990 Chrysler New Yorker Fifth Avenue, which was almost the most opulent Chrysler “K” Car derivative ever. Here we have an image of the car in front of a snazzy joint called Killer Joe’s, with two equally snazzy couples admiring the car. I would almost bet that you could never get away with naming a Restaurant or Bar Killer Joe’s in today’s political climate, but this was the 90’s. The ad copy is also period correct stating that the car is “Saying Something that’s has never been said before.” So, what the hell is that suppose to mean anyway? Is this really the type of setting that would sell a vehicle like this in the first place? (You can click here to see the full size image)

You have the next five days to come up with a great caption. The editors will deliberate on the merits of each entry, and after contemplating our own caption, and we will pronounce a winner. So, get to work and create you’re own caption for this very unusual image.

Photo Credit: Alden Jewell’s Flickr Photostream

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