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Hooniverse Asks Bonus: Which Celebrity Has the Coolest Car?

Black Pearl

I make no bones about my love for Metallica, the mighty metal band from San Francisco. I first heard their music when I was a kid, and was hooked right away. Through the years, they’ve laid down some heavy tracks – not all of them exactly chart toppers – and as the members got older, their artistic interest began to expand. From classic art to horror movie props to rat rods, the aging rockers got their artistic fix by branching out beyond power chords and epic riffage.

James Hetfield, the lead singer and rhythm guitar player, has taken to custom cars (or is it kustom kars?), such as this beauty seen here, called the Black Pearl. Technically, it’s a 1948 Jaguar Mk2, but the body is almost completely handcrafted. I think it’s one of the coolest customs I’ve ever seen.

All that to ask this: which celebrity has the coolest car, and what is it? Let us know in the comments.

[Photo Courtesy Hemmings]

Hooniverse Asks: Carpeted Dash Caps, are They a Good thing or Evil?

Robert Emslie August 28, 2015 Hooniverse Asks


Just like dropped eggs or a resigned gangster under the harsh spotlight of police questioning, it’s likely that your dashboard will eventually crack. That crevasse-tastic surface then stares back at you every time you get behind the wheel, taunting you the way Donald Trump’s comb-over taunts both aesthetic conversion and the wind. There’s two things you can do about that: put a dash cover over the cracks, or, put a cover over the dash before they happen.

Carpeted covers tend to run the gamut from carefully tailored and as form fitting as a starlet’s Oscar-night dress all the way own to… well, those as randomly shaped and ill-fitting as The Donald’s unruly mane. What we want to know is whether any of them – dash caps, not Trump’s toupees – are worth using at all. Are they an acceptable means of either concealing existing damage or preventing it from ever happening in the forst place? What do you think about dash caps: are they a good thing, or are they evil?

Image: Bimmerforums

Hooniverse Asks: How Would You Improve U-Pull-It Junk Yards?

Robert Emslie August 27, 2015 Hooniverse Asks


I’m pretty sure that most all of you know the drill: you pay your two dollars, you head for your particular make or nationality’s neighborhood, and then you start the un-wrenching. The U-Pull-It junk yard has long been a boon to the home mechanic, both for keeping that older daily driver on the road, and parting up a fun car as there’s always something it needs.

Of course it’s not all dessert trays and tequila sunrises at these yards. You typically have to navigate pools of unknown liquids (yes, they’re probably at least some part urine) and then there’s often that part that is securely out of your reach owing to the support upon which the car sits. And don’t get me started about the yards within a yard that are blocked off from view and require an additional two bucks to enter. Geez!

Those are my major complaints, but the junk yard is still one of my favorite haunts, and a cool fall day under a blue sky amidst a cornucopia of opportunity in metal and decaying plastics is about the best time I think a person could have. Of course, it could be better, and that’s the question for today; how would you make U-Pull-It yards better?

Image: ©2015 Hooniverse/Robert Emslie, All Rights Reserved

Hooniverse Asks: Hatch, Dutch, or Splitgate, What’s The Best Wagon Back Door?

Robert Emslie August 26, 2015 Hooniverse Asks


Before there was cup holder lighting options – heck, before there were even cup holders – automotive engineers busied themselves with the perfecting of the wagon back door. Today there are SUVs, Crossovers, and “Cute-Utes” that have supplanted the iconic station wagon across much of the suburban zeitgeist, but one thing they still almost all have in common is a back door.

These days those are almost exclusively roof-hinged hatches, although there remain the few tailgate/hatch and swinging door holdouts spicing up the competition. Back when station wagons ruled the roost back door tech was the locus of family car engineering. Magic Gates, hatchbacks, dutch doors, you name it, somebody offered it.

What I’d like to hear today is a healthy debate on which of these was the best or most efficient mechanism for station wagon – or SUV or whatever – rear access. What do you think, what is the best wagon back door?

Image: Slick Street Stuff

Hooniverse Asks: Is There a Car That’s Loved in One Country, and Vilified in Another?

Robert Emslie August 25, 2015 Hooniverse Asks


The movie Pulp Fiction opens with John Travolta espousing the virtues of Scientology explaining the differences between Europe and the U.S. to Samuel L. Jackson. What it breaks down to is this: it’s the little differences that add up. You know one difference that can really add up is that one country can dig a car or truck – you know, for whatever reason – while that same car or truck can be vilified in another country. In fact, it doesn’t even need to be sold in that hater country. Go figure.

Consider if you will Volkswagen’s “New Beetle.” We love those little rollie pollies here in the U.S. as it makes a certain sector of the population feel nostalgic for their college days when they smoked a lot of pot and got laid. You know what the Beetle reminds people in Germany of? That’s right, Hitler. It doesn’t get much worse than driving around in something that makes you think of Hitler all the freaking time, does it?

That’s the kind of thing we’re looking for today – cars that one country loves, and another hates. This shouldn’t be too hard.

Image: ffffound.com

Hooniverse Asks: What’s the Best Hidden Hatchback?

Robert Emslie August 24, 2015 Hooniverse Asks


Successful magic is all about subterfuge and misdirection, and there’s perhaps nothing more magical than discovering that the car you have been driving is suddenly rendered vastly more utilitarian when it’s found to be a hatchback.

It’s that utilitarianism that perhaps has doomed the hatchback from greater popularity here in the U.S. as work is seen as something the Bourgeoisie do. People of means can’t possibly assist you in transporting that futon because they drive a sedan, as do all individuals of attainment.

Ah, but what if you could have the best of both worlds – a car that looks like a sedan so those judging you will never be the wiser, but is in fact a hatchback so you can actually help your mom move that extra freezer to her sister’s? How great would that be? Well, it’s been good enough that a lot of manufacturers have given the idea a try, and today we want your opinion on which ones have been the most successful.

Image: TurboDodge

Hooniverse Asks: Subaru Fans – Forester or Outback?

Robert Emslie August 21, 2015 Hooniverse Asks


Companies offering multiple options in the same category confuses me. I mean, take Levi’s as an example: they have 501-style jeans, why on Earth do they need anything else?

When it comes to two cars from the same brand seemingly taking up the same spot at the family table I get even more flummoxed, and that’s the case with the other brother of the same mother that is the Subaru Outback and Subaru Forester. I mean, they’re almost exactly the same, and that raises the question, why would you buy one over the other?

Okay Subaru fans (Subaru is numero uno in customer loyalty, so I know you’re out there) give us all an explanation as to why you would choose an Outback over a Forester, or vice versa.

Image: PlanetSubaru

Hooniverse Asks: What Car Model Represents the Worst Case of “What Were They Thinking?”

Robert Emslie August 20, 2015 Hooniverse Asks


Very few cars today represent the laser-like vision of a single, inspired individual. There aren’t that many Shelby Cobras, DeTomaso Panteras, or DeLorean DMC-12s being introduced any more. Most cars these days suffer from committee-design and while it’s generally believed that two heads are better than one, sometimes not even a consensus can stop a goofy design from getting through.

Maybe it’s styling that’s less wistful and more WTF?, or perhaps it’s a feature that lacks even a modicum of common sense. That’s what we’re interested in today: your opinion on what has been the worst cases of what were they thinking auto industry designs.

Image: MentalFloss

Hooniverse Asks: What As Yet Unrealized Celebrity Special Edition Needs to Happen?

Robert Emslie August 19, 2015 Hooniverse Asks


Whether Hollywood, the Paris Fashion District, or the racing circuit, there has been a long history of naming special automotive editions after celebrities. Despite however, all the Gucci Mark Vs, Cooper Minis, and Frank Sinatra Imperials around, there still are a lot of famous folk for whom automotive immortality has been elusive.

Today we want to ruminate on those yet to be created special editions. Who do you think is the most deserving of being honored in steel? What is the celebrity special edition that NEEDS to happen?

Image: TinyPic

Hooniverse Asks: What’s The Least Desirable New or Used Convertible?

Robert Emslie August 18, 2015 Hooniverse Asks


Convertibles are like swimming pools. A lot of people think they want one, but then discover the tradeoffs of ownership often outweigh the benefits. Still, it’s almost always the case that the soft top edition of a car will be more dear than its hard top cousin.

That doesn’t, however make it the case that all convertibles are desirable. Today what we’re looking for are the worst convertibles that history has to offer. What do you think have been the most despicable drop tops that money could buy?

Image: CadillacForums


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