Bad Idea: Subaru Tribeca Stretch Limo

Let’s say you came into some FU money. You’re a big-shot now so you hire a driver because you can’t party with strippers conduct important business and drive at the same time. Since you have a driver, you decide to procure a custom stretch limo, because Maybachs are for tasteless Wall Street hacks. What do you order?

These days large SUVs are the most popular basis for stretch limos, but you don’t care about what’s popular. Sedans, and whatever the hell Ford picked to replace the almighty Panther, are equally lame. Vans, like a customized Mercedes-Benz Sprinter, are huge and comfortable but you don’t want to mistaken for a hotel shuttle. No, you think outside the box, possibly while really high, and you find your answer – Subaru Tribeca! 

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Incredible LEGO Technic MAN Bus

Kamil Kaluski November 13, 2017 All Things Hoon

Based on the LEGO Movie, Master Builders are the amazing rouge creators that do not follow directions. Some of their creations are artsy, some fantasy, and others are just a hodgepodge of crap slapped together. In real life LEGO does have Master Builders who are responsible for the company’s huge display models. But outside the company are people like David Gustafsson from Sweden. The man has been building incredible things from LEGO for some time and this MAN articulated city bus is one of latest creations.  

While it looks like just scaled another model at first, it has some incredible details. The body is build out of typical LEGO bricks but underneath it’s all Technic. The 40-inch model is made out of 7381 pieces and weights nearly 12 pounds. The whole thing is made to 1:18 scale. 

The propulsion motor is placed behind the third axle, just like on the real thing, and it drives only the third axle, just like on the real thing. On the roof, where AC units are placed on a typical bus, are motors that control the doors. It has pneumatic suspension with a compressor, just like the real bus, which allows the front-end to kneel for easier passenger ingress, and shocks on all axles. Even the driver’s seat is suspended, just like on real buses. 

The crazy part is that this bus can be controlled from a smartphone. The bus goes forward and back, and steers. The doors and the air suspension are also operated from the phone app. And David is nice enough to provide 3D directions on how to make this. Good luck with that. 

Gripes about Ford’s many similar buttons

Above is a close look at the climate controls of the new 2018 Ford Expedition. They seem rather unremarkable, typical Ford-like, as they have been for many years now. These controls are located below the infotainment screen and below the radio buttons and knobs. Basically, these are the lowest placed items in the vertical section of the center pod of the dash. 

Say you’re driving your new 5500-pound Expedition at 75 MPH on the highway. You decide that you must change the heated seat setting from two dashes to one. You try to find the button by feel but they are all located near each other, and all feel the same. Instead you accidentally press the “fan-” button. Doing so you took the climate control off the automatic mode and you still haven’t reduced the temperature of your seat. 

You curse and you look down. You’re now looking for two buttons, the “auto” to get the climate control back into the automatic mode, and the heated seat button which you were originally trying to press. Say it takes you three seconds to complete the task of finding and pressing these buttons.

How far has your 5500-pound Expedition traveled in that time?

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Lamborghini Terzo Millennio – Marrying New Technology with New Design

Kamil Kaluski November 7, 2017 Featured, The News!

There are Matchbox cars and there are Hot Wheels cars. You probably had both but had a preference for one over the other. Matchbox always represented the production vehicles. Hot Wheels were the fantasy cars that you’d never see on the streets. Parallels can be made to left and right functions of the brain; artsy versus scientific, visionary versus realist, and all that.

The thing about Lamborghini is that Lamborghinis could be either Hot Wheels or Matchbox. They all look crazy and dramatic but they can be seen on the roads. When Lamborghini introduces a new concept car there is no doubt that it won’t look like anything else but it will magically be Lamborghini-like. To keep things equal, there is always a new technology lurking with each new Lamborghini. The whole vehicle therefore appeals to both the scientific and artistic sides of one’s brain. 

The vehicle pictured here is the Lamborghini Terzo Millennio. It is a concept, making it obvious that it will remain strictly a Hot Wheels car. But the technology it foretells is unlike anything we have seen thus far, appealing to, if not overwhelming, the analytical side of your brain. While we will never see Terzo Millennio production car, chances are that the first electric Lamborghini will use its technology.

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24 Hours of Lemons: Buick nabs a class win at NHMS

We did it! We won our class at the 24 Hours of Lemons Halloween Hooptiefest at New Hampshire Motor Speedway! Yea, that’s right, we won. We got the trophy and the big cash payout that almost covered gas, hotels, and tolls. Yeah!

Thanks, we appreciate your congratulatory chuckle and nod as you’re reading this.

A win is a win but there is one problem – this was not really the way we wanted to win. But we will keep our cash and trophy, thank you very much. Allow me to explain.

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Lamborghini and MIT Join Forces For a New Concept Car

Kamil Kaluski November 3, 2017 The News!

Lamborghini, the Italian maker of fine tractors, really fast cars, and soon again SUVs, will unveil a new concept car on Monday. The concept car is a collaboration of Lamborghini and the Massachusetts Institute of Technology, where it will be shown. Lamborghini showed the above teaser image of the car which, thank Ferruccio, does not look like a cross-over utility vehicle.

Nothing is really known about this vehicle other than that it has LED lights (because we can see them in the picture), probably four wheels, and that it will utilize some kind of electric power. And it’s probably nothing like the Huracan RWD Spyder that Jeff drove sometime ago. Like most concepts its purpose is to foreshadow the future of technology and design, and set path for future models. 

The really good news is that I will be there for this event, along with every other major automotive media outlet. I’ll have pics and details on Monday! If you have questions, put them in the comments. 

SEMA 2017: New Classic Defenders and Land Cruisers

Kamil Kaluski October 31, 2017 SEMA

Retro-modding or throwback designs are all the rage now. Take an older, classic, vehicle and upgrade everything to modern standards and you get something really cool. It’s been done with American muscle cars, Porsches, and now classic 4x4s are becoming more and more popular. Two of the makers of these cool vehicles showed up at SEMA with their latest designs. The FJ Company brought a modernized 1981 FJ43 Land Cruiser and East Coast Defender brought a custom wide-body 1985 Land Rover Defender. 

Click for the details on each of those awesome 4x4s. 

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SEMA 2017: Crate Engines, Turbo Four and Super Eight

Kamil Kaluski October 30, 2017 SEMA

2017 SEMA is officially under way and some of the biggest news today came directly from the automakers. Both Honda and Fiat-Chrysler made big news with the engines from some of their best performing new cars are now available as crate engines. Honda showed its 306-horsepower Civic Type R engine crate engine and Chrysler showed off the 707-horsepower Hellcat engine.

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Hooniverse Asks: What Do You Want To See at SEMA?

Kamil Kaluski October 30, 2017 Hooniverse Asks

SEMA, the Specialty Equipment Market Association, Show is happening this week in Las Vegas. Jeff and the podcast gang will be there, bringing you a ton of near-future podcast stuff. The rest of us will unfortunately be glued to our computers and other portable electronic devices to get the news. Seeing that just about every damn after-market company will be at SEMA, what would you like to see? The latest OEM builds? Outrageous custom creations? Race parts? LED lights for your ’84 Cadillac? What’s most interesting in the world of aftermarket to you?

Aftermarket Audio: From Replacement to Integration

Back in the good old days, the 1980s and 90s, car audio, like everything else, was simple. Most vehicles had a DIN-, or double-DIN-sized headunit. The headunit would have an AM/FM radio and a cassette or a compact disc player – the truly luxury cars would have both. A small LCD display screen would show the radio frequency or the song number. There would be six preset buttons. Adventurous automakers would integrate CD changer controls which allowed for hours of uninterrupted music, if anyone actually liked the other ten songs those albums.

Today’s headunits are much more than that. CD players are almost extinct. In their place we have USB ports, auxiliary inputs, and blue teeth. AM/FM radio is quickly being replaced by satellite radio. There are apps for Pandora and other such steamers. All of that is displayed on screens that are getting bigger each year, which also display the navigation system. Then there are the camera connections and full integration of phones into the dash. All of this is neatly molded into the dash and controlled from the steering wheel, or knobs or touchpads located by the arm rest. 

All of this makes the simplest audio upgrade, a headunit swap, almost impossible. And frankly, it isn’t desirable, either. Most aftermarket head units never looked right and are often unintuitive and difficult to use. In most cases headunits no longer power the speakers as the use of external amplifiers is increasing. But what if you want a better sound system in your new-ish car?

There are several choices…

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