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Classic Captions – The 1957 Plymouth Belvedere Edition

Jim Brennan February 3, 2015 Hooniverse Classic Captions Contest 31 Comments

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Welcome to the Hooniverse Classic Captions Post, and it’s that time of the week in which this feature appears, so let’s review the premise; I search for images that were used by the car companies in their print advertising, dealer displays or brochures, and it is your job to provide a humorous caption that is some how tied in with the image. I’m starting to get sick of Winter, so I thought I would brighten things up a bit, but we will get to that in a moment…

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Last time we had an image of a Chrysler on a Ski Slope, and the participation rate was awful, and I wonder if it because I’m using vintage images… anyway, let’s review last week’s entries. Our runner up comment came from one of our regulars, PotbellyJoe ★★★★★, and it was a little on the weird side: “Shit, it’s your crazy aunt, she must have been following us. Damn, why did I have to buy such a unique vehicle. Get low, get low Susie. We’ll have to ski our way to safety.” See what I mean by weird? But there was one caption that you all liked a bit better…

And the winning comment was from one of our regulars, smalleyxb122, and he tried to remind us of another Chrysler Product: “…and she began to wonder what it would be like if her Chrysler had skis. She approached the people at Chrysler with the idea, and it was dismissed as purely a flight of fancy.

Seven years later, when Chrysler introduced the Sno Runner, she remembered the thought, and brought suit against the automaker. They reached a settlement entitling her to a percentage of the profits.

She thought a share of the profits was fair enough, until she found out that the Sno Runner was sold at a loss, and with each sale, she owed Chrysler two dollars and some change as her share of the negative profits.

Mercifully, the Sno Runner was only sold for 4 years, but legend has it that Nancy still owed Chrysler fourteen dollars at the time of her death in 1986.”
The Chrysler Sno-Runner has been featured here on the Hooniverse Before, and you can read about it here. Thanks for reminding us smalleyxb122 and congratulations on winning this week’s Caption Contest.

It’s now time to take a look at this weeks entry, and once again I dive into the Flickr Account of Alden Jewell. This ad is for the 1957 Plymouth with the guy telling the audience that he is no millionaire, but the Plymouth is his. This was part of the infamous Plymouth Tag Line when these cars were introduced exclaiming “Suddenly, it’s 1960!” One thing I have noticed with this particular ad image is that if you take the car away, it really doesn’t look dated. Yes, I think this particular advertisement was perfect for the period, and I really think it was a great way to sell a relatively mundane sedan… So, would you have ever thought of a more appropriate tag line? (You can see the full ad here)

You have the next five days to come up with a great caption. The editors will deliberate on the merits of each entry, and after contemplating our own caption, and we will pronounce a winner. So, get to work and create you’re own caption for this very appropriate image.

Photo Credit: Alden Jewell’s Flickr Photostream

  • neight428

    "All you hosers go visit your local Ontario Plymouth Dealer to check out the latest models, eh?"

  • $kaycog

    Good job, smalleyxb122, on your winning caption! Here's a Chrysler for your efforts.

    <img src="http://www.skippyforums.com/forums/gallery/files/5/9/chrysler_300c_1_-_american_cars.jpg"width="500"/&gt;

  • PotbellyJoe ★★★★★

    His strong need to be close to Marsha made Steve become a borderline stalker. When she married George and moved to Pittsburgh, he just didn't know what to do. His seat of his pants scheme of being a pool maintenance supply salesman wasn't going to work. He needed a new scheme.

    "But all I have is this Belvedere." He thought. And then it hit him.

    • dukeisduke

      I see what you did there.

  • Vavon

    Plymouth owners rule n°1: "You better not rub her the wrong way!"

  • skitter

    Using the latest in crystal technology, this Plymouth can expand to carry two, four, or six people. Just add water! And forget about parking! Just a few drops of our secret solvent, and it shrinks down to fit in this attractive cloth handcase!

  • Alff

    Young Cal's early success as a Plymouth salesman led to an inflated ego. Brash and cocky, he carried a hose around the lot as an inside joke with the boys. When he approached a customer with it slung across his shoulder, they knew another buyer was about to get hosed. Some of the veterans swore he'd be a flash in the pan, but Cal Worthington got the last laugh.

  • Okay. That's the last time you run that mechanical asshole in here without an exhaust hose… I catch you doing it one time, and you're out, you understand?

  • Devin

    "If you're going to pick up chicks in your Belvedere, don't forget to wear a rubber!"

    It soon became clear that Billy didn't understand his dad's advice.

  • P161911

    When it actually is 1960 and you realize that you are the only one driving a new car with HUGE fins, just run this hose from the exhaust pipe to the driver's window and let her idle for a few minutes.

  • GTXcellent

    Hi, I'm Pete Rose. Rookie of the Year for the Cincinnati Reds, and for that perfect finish, I always use Turtle Wax. You can bet on it!"

  • "Suddenly it's 1960! With three years of instant depreciation built right in at the factory, I don't even care that I just washed it with the windows rolled down. That's ease of ownership."

  • The all new '57 Plymouth: The perfect car for picking up hose!

  • dukeisduke

    Christine waited patiently for the photographer to finish his work, then promptly smashed Ken and his 5/8" diameter, 25-foot garden hose with adjustable brass nozzle into a concrete wall.

  • Irishzombieman☆
    • Alcology

      awesome

    • Alff

      Well done. Don Draper would have hired you.

    • Vairship

      Bros before hose!

  • paulz67

    From the moment Christine hit the dealer's lot, the car bedeviled the detail kid, who could not for the life of him get those damned water spots out of the fire red paint job.

  • You many not remember me, but we went to high school together.

  • SpiroAgnew76

    Christine-The early years.

  • 1977chevytruck

    The 1957 Plymouth Belvedere comes with a jump rope so you can jump for joy AND get in shape for later (so you can run when it tries to kill you).

  • stigshift

    "That's right- we're going to bury this car in a capsule for 50 years, and then give it away to some lucky person!" Sadly, 50 years later, the winner of 'Miss Belvedere' was truly hosed… http://www.autosavant.com/wp-content/uploads/2012

  • DoubleR

    With my Golden commando twin 4-barrels and 100 ft of hose, I'm never to far from a tank of gas.

  • P161911

    Suddenly it's 1960! We pre-installed the rust at the factory for that 3 year old look in 3 months.

  • Tiller188

    It puts carnauba on the doors, or else it gets the hose some more.

  • ptschett

    Hey Jim… I don't think you should feel badly about the participation. For myself, other than that one time a long time ago in a galaxy far, far away where I got away with the old Folgers Crystals joke that's even older than I am, there's usually been a clear winner by the time I get home from work and have a chance to think about an entry.

  • fodder650

    My father said to me 'Bob, you need to get a car that can lay some rubber on the road". I took his words to heart and got this Plymouth. Thanks to my 2 speed automatic, I can keep my hand free as I uncoil the hose.

  • Skink

    I plan to grow into these pants, said Tim, age 30.

  • "Money Cars Clothes Hose" meant something just a little different back in the day, but Lil' Wayne probably don't know nothing about that.

    (If you must, here is your song link.)