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Classic Captions – The 1966 Chevrolet Corvette Edition

Jim Brennan August 27, 2013 Hooniverse Classic Captions Contest 32 Comments


Welcome to the Hooniverse Classic Captions Post. This is a series of posts that are set to run this time each week, so let’s review the premise; I search for images that were used by the car companies in their print advertising or brochures, and it is your job to provide a humorous, snarky, or thought provoking caption that is some how tied in with the image. This week we have an image that you can hardly forget, but we will get to that in a bit.


Last week, we had an image of a Nash in the Woods, and while the responses were a little on the light side (What’s up with that?) they were all very good. The runner-up comment was from our very own “Queen of the Images” Ms. $kaycog, and her caption went something like this: “Nashurally, Frank fell for this car hook, line and sinker.” This was a very clever tie-in with the fishing rods pictured in the image, so well done $kaycog!

But there was one caption that was clearly the favorite this time around, and it was by lilwillie, and it was at my expense… “Jim, why is your boat upside down?” Of course I’m guessing that the Nash Airflyte was sometimes described as an upside down Bathtub, so very well done lilwillie on a very relevant Classic Caption.

It’s now time to take a look at this weeks image, and it is a Print Advertisement for the 1966 Chevrolet Corvette Coupe, with a beautifully dressed couple who seem to be relaxing around a water fountain of some sort. What is really interesting is that they seem to be in evening attire (A Tux for him, and a glamorous gown for her) and she seems to be pouring water (or Champagne) from her shoe into his open mouth… So, what do you think this exquisitely dressed couple are actually doing in a setting like this? Are they drunk out of their minds? Are they tripping on Acid? Is this some kind of prelude to doing the nasty? And why are there so many of these twisted images readily available in car advertising during the mid to late 1960s? Only you can answer these (and so many other) questions, and add a little humor in an otherwise humdrum Tuesday! (You can click here to see the full size image)

You have the next five days to come up with a great caption. The editors will deliberate entries, and after contemplating our own caption, we will pronounce a winner. So, get to work and create you’re own caption for this very provocative image.

Photo Credit: Alden Jewell’s Flickr Photostream

  • Devin

    Christian Louboutin's line of edible shoes somehow didn't catch on.

  • YES!

    [youtube zOrfzC78oEI http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zOrfzC78oEI youtube]

  • Ok sweety. I've done the dishes, I've mowed the lawn, I've cleaned the garage, I put a tux on to go to your sisters wedding and now I'm drinking swamp water out of your shoe.

    Can I pretty please drive your daddy's Corvette now?

  • $kaycog

    Nice one, lilwillie! For your efforts, here's a Nash Metroplitan.

    <img src="http://s4.hubimg.com/u/835887_f520.jpg"width="500"/&gt;

  • skitter

    I know he's a real prince now, but sometimes it's like he's still a frog inside.

  • Irishzombieman☆

    Doris was always a bit weird, and while it might seem odd that she had a fish hook tied to her shoe, nobody who knew her was really surprised. None of us ever figured out, though, why the hell Eddie put the damned thing in his mouth.

  • Vavon

    NO, NO, NO! The Corvette is a coupe, not a clownshoe!!!

    Those marketing people really don't know anything about cars!

  • Devin

    "Neeeeeooooowwwwnnn here comes the airplane!"

  • tempesjo

    We are witnessing Leon's first sip of the elixir of the Fountain of Middle Age from the shoe of a trophy wife. Upon completion of the transformation, the hair on Leon's head had been exchanged for a dense forest of chest hair; his tuxedo became a half-unbuttoned Hawaiian shirt, shorts, and three gold chains; and his Malibu had transfigured into a Corvette.

  • $kaycog

    After Jack showed Jill a little heel and toe in his Vette, Jill showed him her heel and toe.

  • Rex and the future Mrs. Ryan, ca 1968.

  • GTXcellent

    Trust me Darling, it's just like catching snowflakes on your tongue.

  • OA5599

    Bridget was so stupid, people would describe her as being incapable of pouring piss out of a boot with the directions written on the heel.

    Incredibly, Fred was even stupider than that.

  • FЯeeMan

    "Dinner, dancing, and the keys to the 'vette too? You may now drink champagne from my sweaty shoe."

    Jim knew he could do better, but he kept coming back to Alice.

  • onrails

    "This chardonnay has an interesting nose" thought Brian, "with delicate hints of vanilla, apples, and Tinactin."

    • dukeisduke

      Tough actin' Tinactin! BOOM!

  • Van_Sarockin

    Our owners might be into questionable, voyeuristic watersports. But there's nothing fishy about the new Stingray.

  • PushrodRWD

    I told you that if I beat your Porsche you would have to eat my shoe.

  • Ed's favorite toy was his Corvette; Brenda's favorite toy was Ed's alcoholism.

  • mkep819

    A 66 Corvette, and some Chateau Le Feet. The recipe for a magical night.

  • SSurfer321

    If the Corvette didn't impress the ladies, Fred would fall back on his training as former sword swallowing magician.

  • fodder650

    She tried to Vette Ray as a potential mate but she knew that it was just going to be a spring fling before she went Nova and caused this one to leave as well.

  • Neen85

    "Coach, I can't practice today…I just saw a Chevy ad and I've never been more inspired…the shoes, the corvette, the outlandishness of it all."
    <img src="http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lg8b0uAR131qch9gxo1_500.jpg"&gt;

    "I think I'm destined to be a pop artist Coach."

  • Joe Btfsplk

    "Don't let a small penis hold YOU back…. do like Bob and shift her into high gear…. with the New 1966 CORVETTE ! "

  • Dean Bigglesworth

    "Eat this fucking shoe and die, you miserable old git. I'm taking the Vette."

  • danleym

    In the early days of targeted advertising, Chevy tried to appeal to every audience possible. Hence this perplexing ad from Fetishist magazine, where Chevy tried to convince the readers that owning a Corvette was a sure fire way to get into a beautiful lady's shoes.

  • After the Corvette's wicked acceleration snapped Bob's neck, Sylvia's unskilled attempt at first aid didn't help much.

  • Lotte

    1. Make money
    2. Acquire red sports car
    3. Attract female with said sports car
    4. ???
    5. This isn't really working out for me, guys…