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Hooniverse Classic Captions – The 1963 Chevrolet Corvette Sting Ray Edition

Jim Brennan January 8, 2013 Hooniverse Classic Captions Contest 63 Comments

1963 Corvette Ad-05

Welcome to the Hooniverse Classic Captions Post, returning from an extended vacation through the holidays. This is a series of postings that are set to go off at this time almost every Tuesday, so let’s review the premise; I search for images that were used by the car companies in their print advertising or brochures, and it is your job to provide a humorous, snarky, or thought provoking caption that is some how tied in with the image. Let’s see you try and come up with a clever caption for this week, and if you haven’t participated, isn’t it time for you to do so?

6404089269_8f53be93fc_oLast time, we had an image of a Woman flagging down a ride with a Broken Shoe, and we received the highest number of comments ever for this series (Well done!). One of our longtime fans, $kaycog, actually came close to winning the contest this time with this great caption: “Out of gas, Boris? You’re such a heel to make me walk to the gas pumps. What a soulless loafer you are.” Of course, this lead to a series of puns, and was one of the most entertaining series of banter ever. Way to go $kaycog!

However, our old friend Alff came up with the winning caption this time, with this great comment: “A woman waving her shoe at a Skoda. One is reliable communist transportation technology … the other is a Skoda.” Congratulations Alff on coming up with another brilliant caption.

It’s now time to take a look at this weeks illustration. This is an advertising image for the 1963 Chevrolet Corvette Sting Ray Coupe, with a rather handsome woman tossing her hat onto… well, you know it’s the 1960s, since this particular piece of lawn art isn’t around anymore. This is a great period piece of advertising, since the Corvette is always thought of as a Man’s car. Obviously, this is a woman of means, either by her own making, or by marriage. So, is this really a good image to sell a Corvette? (You can click here to see the full size image)

You have the next five days to come up with a great caption. The editors will deliberate entries, and after having the Mrs. abscond with our sports car, we will pronounce a winner. So, get to work and create you’re own caption for this intriguing image.

Photo Credit: The Old Car Manual Project

  • You dumb broad, that's obviously not my hat!

  • fodder650

    Mrs. Benny got sick of Jack's penny pinching and took him for a ride in the divorce even going so far to take half of Rochester with her.

  • danleym

    Lady, I'd be showing you a different finger if I wasn't made out of stone.

  • $kaycog

    Yay, Alff! Here's a Skoda for you. I hope you like red!

    <img src="http://farm5.staticflickr.com/4120/4919377169_ddbd5858bc_z.jpg"width="500"/&gt;

    Image: flickr – tatraskoda

  • Devin

    The followup to "Lars and the Real Girl" didn't get very far into production.

    • Alcology

      awesome movie!

  • vetteman61

    Here Shinoda, hold my hat. I can't see anything trying to back up with this big bar in the middle of the window. These cars will never catch on.

  • skitter

    I saw this old witch driving a Sting Ray, and told her such a powerful car was probably too much for her.

    She turned me into a lawn statue, and all they found was my hat.

  • Van_Sarockin

    All I can think of is Randy Newman's song "You Can Keep Your Hat On'.

  • $kaycog

    "Ma'am, he's letting you drive his Vette? That's the last straw…………………..hat."

    • Scandinavian Flick

      Are you trying to top last week's pun thread and be the toque of the blog again? This topic could be a bit of a challenge, but I'll try to bowler you over anyway…

      Pith helmet.

      • $kaycog

        I must confez, this would be a hard one.

        • danleym

          You guys are fedorable. Don't beret me for this, but I love these pun threads.

          • No one can Top that.

            • $kaycog

              Indeed. Excuse me while I scarf down a sandwich and a bowler of soup.

              • danleym

                Would you like a pork pie with that?

                • $kaycog

                  Excellent! That's using the old beanie.

                  • dwbf11

                    Apparently you missed the advisory that the puns detract from the point of this contest.

                    • danleym

                      Very well, herr Capotain. No more puns, apparently you're quite fez'd up with them. Mitre I ask why, though?

                    • fodder650

                      The author didn't put a lid on the pun threads. He said that it gave him ten gallon of happiness.

                    • dwbf11

                      I feel as though I am brimming with things to say here. Maybe we need to kippah a limit on the puns though?

                    • fodder650

                      There is no reason to limit it to three points or something.

                    • dwbf11

                      No bee in my bonnet. I just prefer a more sombrero tone to the posts.

                    • $kaycog

                      You make me tiara up in shame. I'll try to put a cap on it.

                    • danleym

                      Kepi your head up. Don't let him brow beat you, this is turbaning out to be a great thread.

                    • $kaycog

                      I'm getting a headache. I'll just reach into my pillbox for an aspirin.

                    • danleym

                      Is the headache from the thread, or did you have a few too many nightcaps yesterday?

                    • $kaycog

                      I think the reason might reveil too much.

  • fodder650

    The statute of limitations on her stealing the car had just ended when this shot was taken.

    • topdeadcentre

      The statue of limitations on her stealing the car had just ended when this shot was taken.

      FTFY! 😀

      • fodder650

        Yeah that was what I was going for but I was hoping people would read between the lines 🙂

  • Devin

    Judy's increasingly extreme attempts to prevent her husband from driving their new Corvette would soon draw the suspicion of her neighbors.

    • Devin

      Turns out this made sense only to me (and actively annoyed someone else). It was trying to play off the tagline and for some reason I thought about her turning her husband into a statue…

      Alright it doesn't even make sense to me anymore, I'll cop to that.

  • dwbf11

    A candid shot from outside the Romney residence in Bloomfield Hills, Michigan circa 1963.

    • Devin

      But wouldn't they be driving a Marlin or an Ambassador?

      • fodder650

        This was during his rebellious youth.

  • Target29

    As she discarded the last piece of evidence while driving away from the Men's Club, Joanna knew that she would no longer be called a Stepford wife.

    • fodder650

      Nicely played.

  • Introducing the 1963 Stingray … for the street racist in all of us.

    • Mo sooner, mo betta.

    • dwbf11

      In all fairness, "lawn jockeys" such as the one shown here did not start out as racist symbols but as a way for underground railroad houses to signal that it was safe to enter. This article does a nice write up. http://www.ferris.edu/htmls/news/jimcrow/question

      That said the connotation definitely works in this pic so your caption earned an up vote from me!

      • Interesting, I did not know that. I would venture that those who display them today (yes, I still see them from time to time) are probably unaware of their history as well.

        • The last one I saw had been repainted Caucasian, but even that was the early eighties.

          • Some of the cranky old timers in my last neighborhood had them in the late nineties, and there's a house a few miles away that still has one. Leaves me shaking my head.

    • OA5599

      [youtube RovF1zsDoeM http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RovF1zsDoeM youtube]

  • Van_Sarockin

    And this wasn't the only hat trick Cecilia found she could do with her new Corvette. I'd like to tell you about them, but those stories are all blue.

  • onrails

    After tossing his hat outside and checking his makeup in the mirror, Lou's costume was complete and he rolled off to the local 1/4 mile track to teach those doubters the real meaning of 'drag queen'.

    • Van_Sarockin

      I thought I'd destroyed the last of those negatives…

      But, when I say I'm in the pink, I'm talking slips.

  • Good thing that I'm a rich woman with a Corvette in 1963, because racial sensitivity means nothing to me.

  • kah

    By honey, hope you have a good trip. Tell your mother sorry I couldn't make it this time…oh don't forget your hat.

  • gessvt

    Gwyneth was the life of the Grosse Pointe Junior League. Her Magical Levitating Hat trick, for example, was just superb.

  • topdeadcentre

    Wax on, hat off!

  • Before bra burning became popular amongst the women's lib activists, throwing hats at lawn jockeys was briefly considered.

  • Autocrosses at the Birmingham Country club were a little different. Hitting the cast iron lawn jockey did a lot more than just add two seconds to your time. But if you could retrieve the hat your time was reduced by 10 seconds.

  • "It's a footman's car"

  • You have to love the models of those cars back in the day. The post cards are classic and the print-ads for those are going early in auctions.

  • Today, while I was at work, my sister stole my iPad
    and tested to see if it can survive a forty foot drop, just so she
    can be a youtube sensation. My iPad is now destroyed and she has 83 views.
    I know this is entirely off topic but I had to share it
    with someone!

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  • I love it when folks get together and share opinions.
    Great blog, keep it up!