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Hooniverse Asks- Is There an Automotive Brand That Makes You Automatically Hate its Owners?

Robert Emslie November 30, 2012 Hooniverse Asks 180 Comments

Douchebags, we all hate ‘em, am I right? And the reason we hate them is because they are, well, douchebags, there’s just no sugar coating it. Thing of it is, we don’t just hate certain personality types, we hate every aspect of their existence. And it’s not just D-bags, there’s a bunch of different people out there that we can classify into this category or that, and their one communal trait would be that they universally rub us the wrong way. 

Usually you can identify these people by the clothes they wear, or their freakishly obsessive tanning regime, or maybe, it’s possible, by their cars. Are there certain cars and trucks that make you immediately hate their owners just by association? I don’t mean those inconsiderate jack of all asses who take up multiple parking spaces for their precious set of wheels, but specific makes and models favored by those who, for whatever reason, you think are dilholes?

Is it possible, do you think, to identify a dick just by his car, and if so which brands are the most likely to be dick-owned? What automotive make or model identifies their owner as automatically loathe-worthy?

Image: [MTVNews]

Currently there are 180 comments on this article:

  1. Mnm4ever says:

    Ferrari and Lamborghini are givens, too easy. My personal favorite to hate on is Infiniti G35 coupe owners. Almost invariably owned by total D-bags of the Jersey Shore variety. The new Camaro is a runner up. Honorable mention goes to the M3 now that they are becoming cheap enough in the used market for typical D-bags to afford.

    • Xedicon says:

      I must confess I know and have met several Ferrari owners who were all very nice, casual dudes. Heh one of them actually had a supercharged 430 that I saw when he pulled up to a coffee shop I was at, and he let me check it all out and sit in it and see the engine. Was a really nice guy.

      • BobWellington says:

        The only Lamborghini owner I've ever said anything to seemed like an alright guy. He looked like a bum for being in a Lamborghini, though (and I do believe he owns it, I've seen him multiple times and their is nowhere to rent one nearby).

      • Scandinavian Flick says:

        It really seems to depend on why they own the car. If someone supercharged a 430, chances are they love high performance cars, but just happen to be able to afford the definitional one. Then there's the designer handbag buyer, who bought it for the prancing horse on the side.

        I've met people on both sides of that coin. My favorite was the guy who owned an Aston Martin DB9, and you can tell he beat the hell out of it. He drove it to a meet with R compound tires, dirty as hell, and rock chipped from the previous day's trip to the track.

      • mnm4ever says:

        I dont think anyone here is trying to say that everyone who drives "whatever" car is always a D-bag; for every comment there seems to be 3 replies offering up exceptions to the rule. Of course there are exceptions. Lots of Porsche owners track the cars. Many, many more drive them to the gym and take up 2 parking spots. Especially the 996 or Boxster since they can be had so cheap in the used market. That ups the DB percentages.

        We pick on exotics because MOST of the buyers seem to choose them simply to make a statement that they can afford them. Ferrari, Lambo, Bentley, Rolls, Masarati, Aston, etc, etc. I would love to own any of them, and I wouldn't be a DB either. But a lot of the owners are.

  2. PotbellyJoe says:

    <img src="http://www.allcarphotos.net/wp-content/uploads/2012/05/mercedes-benz-c-class-01.jpg&quot; width=500>
    For aspiring D-bags… At least in the NY/NJ/CT area…

  3. Tanshanomi says:

    <img src="http://images.cdn.autocar.co.uk/sites/autocar.co.uk/files/imagecache/article_image_480/rolls-royce-185101016387981600×1060.jpg&quot; width="500">
    Bentley owners. Because going for the Rolls would have looked a bit, ya know, ostentatious.
    Heaven forbid anyone think they're deliberately flaunting their wealth.

    • SSurfer321 says:

      I've always been taught that Bentley's are for drivers and Rolls' are for being driven in.

    • topdeadcentre says:

      Rolls-Royce and Bentley have really diverged since the mid-late 20th century days when they were essentially the same car with a different grille design. I don't like the new Rolls-Royce designs much compared to what they used to be, but around Massachusetts, Bentleys mostly seem to be very nice commuter cars for the boardroom types and there are almost no Rollers to be seen.

  4. Dutch says:

    Two words.
    Toyota Prius.
    F**k "em.

    • dukeisduke says:

      We have some friends that bought two used ones, mainly for the gas mileage. The husband is a retired AF Lt. Colonel, a test pilot for a defense contractor, that flies RC-135s for a living. He has a 40+ mile commute each way, that he formerly did in a Gen I RX-7 (great car, lousy gas mileage). They definitely are the opposite of the stereotypical Prius owners.

      • Scandinavian Flick says:

        To me, the Prius is the modern daily beater for people who like to buy new cars. They are reliable, efficient, safe, and practical. The roll the Civic used to take back in the 80s and 90s. I know a number of people in the car enthusiast groups I hang out with who daily drive a Prius or similar, and have a burly, nasty, dead dino sucking, fun car for other occasions.

    • HTWHLS says:

      I could only +1 this….I would have given you +8.

  5. iRbitterT says:

    Volvo. Anyone who owns a Volvo newer than 2005-ish… Old volvos are for HighSchool and college age girls to drive as tanks… New volvos are for Asshats, period.

  6. dculberson says:

    I think I get along with too many radically different people to make that leap. Too many times I've thought someone's a total douche at first glance but they've turned out to be a great guy. So I'll snicker at the douchemobile but still try to see if the owner fits the stereotype – even if they have spray tan and spiked hair. Although that might be a bit much.

    But I have met someone that had a tattoo of their car on their shoulder, seemed like an instant douche branding, but he was great to hang out with. So you never know!

  7. muthalovin says:

    Nope. There are cool people that own cool brands as well as lame brands. They just get a bad rap mostly.

    Jeff has a Prius in the stable. I own a Ducati. We are cool dudes, right guys? Right?

  8. $kaycog says:

    I know a couple of douchebags, but I don't hold it against their vehicles.

  9. I'm going to go with the "pointless douchey modification" over the vehicle type or brand. Be it a lifted diesel pickup with big rig stacks, a perfectly Simonized bed floor and scratch free trailer hitch or a lowered import sub-compact with huge rims, painted calipers and a shocker sticker on the back. The mods make the douche.

    • gearz1 says:

      Well put!

    • gearz1 says:

      Well put! Although my peeve is the way loud look at me exhaust.

      • ptschett says:

        Is it just my neighbors, or is there a significant overlap in the Venn diagram between "has an extremely loud exhaust" and "lets the vehicle idle for a ridiculous time period before driving away"?

        For example: at my previous apartment, my upstairs neighbor had a straight-piped Harley. He'd idle it (and randomly blip the throttle for no apparent reason) for 10-15 minutes before leaving, even if it was 100 degrees out. There were times that I'd decide to also go for a ride several minutes after I heard his bike fire up, and I could put on my full gear, fire up my KLR650, give it all the warmup it needed (not much) and be gone before he left.

        Where I am now, a neighbor has a late-model WRX STI sedan. Neat car, but obnoxiously loud at idle and it tends to make windows resonate in the building. Now that winter is setting in, the guy lets it idle for 15-20 minutes before driving away.

    • Xedicon says:

      B..B..B..But like, DUDE, way massive rear wings add like 38hp! It's because it lifts the front drive wheels and there's like less drag and stuff so they can spin fasterZ!

  10. OA5599 says:

    These cars are rare enough that I've never met an owner in person, but I know that some of these exotics have been imported via jetliner. Anyone who puts on such a vulgar show of ostentation is bound to be a douche. Cornering the market on them is just icing on the cake, er, vinegar on the douche.

    <img src="http://i640.photobucket.com/albums/uu125/mharrell_photographs/KVMini1x2.jpg&quot; width=500>

  11. Maymar says:

    As I'm a borderline park-Occupying pinko commie (or at least Don Cherry would probably describe me that way), I'm wary of any luxury brand. BMWs are a given, certain Benzes (especially GLs driven by really tiny women, like the one who drove the wrong way down a one way, and then expected me to back up, since she couldn't), Infiniti Gs (although one of my wife's best friends drives one, and he's a really good guy), and worst of all, Range Rover Sports (because why wouldn't you just buy an LR4?).

    Backing away from the class warfare though, Corolla, Camry, and Jetta TDI drivers are pretty much guaranteed to piss me off. Old farmers in pickups too, although I'd be perfectly content to just avoid farm country.

    Oh, and I can't forget late-model Impalas. Or at least the orange ones. If any cop who set up a speed trap just followed a taxi around for a couple hours, they'd easily hit their month's quota.

  12. DemonXanth says:

    Mansory as an aftermarket/tuner brand.

    Why? Because people who buy these cars continue to give money to people who ruin cars. We should not support automotive terrorists like this.

  13. Alff says:

    Stanley Steamer, invariably puttering along in the left lane, holding up traffic.

  14. onrails says:

    The only thing wrong with the Corvette…is the bulk of the owners.

    Not that it keeps me from aspiring to be one of them. Still want, despite the douchebaggery that goes along with it.

    • rwd guy says:

      Well im one of those vette owners when i bought mine i was a single dad to a 14 year old girl who wanted a car to beat on at the local autox track day events. The truth is now most guys in my class hate me to when i get them by 4 plus seconds at the autox ! I do think its funny how people hate you before they ever get to know you but keep hating me for busting my ass to get what i dream of! Parting words haters suck as bad as bad drivers do keep it real and follow your dreams and dont hate on people for making there dreams come true!

      • MVEilenstein says:

        I . . . can't disagree with this.

      • mnm4ever says:

        Problem is, you kinda come off like a DB with a response like this. No one is hating on you or your car or what you do with it or why you bought it. I love Corvettes, I have often thought about getting one myself. But that doesn't change the fact that for every cool Vette owner there are 20-30 of them that are total DBs, or just incredibly tasteless.

        Some guy around here has a gorgeous new burgandy Grand Sport, and has outfitted it with every possible chrome accent or badge he could find in the Ecklers catalog… outside, interior, engine compartment, tailpipes, stickers, wheels of course, etc, I bet he has $5k of chrome on it. Of course it's an automatic too, and he is at every local car show showing it off. I completely admire his enthusiasm, but at the same time, he is a total DB. It doesn't make me not want a Corvette, but it virtually guarantees that I won't be parking in the Vette lineup at the car shows if I did get one.

        • rwd guy says:

          If you live in California come out to a all corvette autox i like they guys who put on the marina event promise there will be on db for ever 20 cool people

  15. danleym says:

    I can't help it, I don't know why, nut when I see a BMW, that's the first thought in my mind. Not that I can't get over it, I've had friends that own them, but it is the first impression I get.
    <img src="http://d3uwin5q170wpc.cloudfront.net/photo/92819_460s.jpg"&gt;

    And a certain type of Mustang gives off that vibe, too. It's the overly modified excessively aggressive ones.
    <img src="http://mustang1.net/data/media/20/Mustang_modified%20%2818%29.jpg&quot; width="500/">

    Oh, and the one Lotus Esprit owner in my old apartment complex that had "SCKRIDE" or something close to that as his license plate. Though that's more an issue with the individual owner, I don't think that way about Lotus' in general.

  16. Xedicon says:

    <img src="http://media.treehugger.com/assets/images/2011/10/toyota-prius-red-b02.jpg"&gt;

    Prius. Didn't have to think even a millisecond for this one. Prius owners are insufferable!

  17. Devin says:

    Outside of Mansory or similar awful tuners, I can't actually think of anything where I hate the owners automatically. For the most part everything has a mix of cool people and douches.

    I will say I do treat Mercury with suspicion, since their owners are all on the very old side, but then again they're usually really nice people behind the wheel, it's not their fault they got macular degeneration and slow reflexes.

  18. BobWellington says:

    So basically the automotive equivalent of Apple?

    Well, I'd say lowered trucks/SUVs, cars with ridiculously huge plastic chrome wheels, especially on trucks/SUVs, and Priuses. BMWs get an honorable mention.

  19. jtk2 says:

    Back when they were popular, it was those terrible Thunderbird Supercoupes. Invariably their owners think (thought?) they are/were the best cars ever.

    Then after that it was a competition between those newer Monte Carlos (especially the "Intimidator Edition") and the Grand Prix GTP.

    But these days, based solely on the way I see them driving on the highway, it's Hyundai/Kia SUV drivers. I'm not sure if it's limited to Illinois or what, but they seem to drive as fast as they can until they are tailgating, and then switch lanes without signalling and accelerate as fast as possible to the next bumper. Repeat over and over again. Although I'm also not a fan of people with giant SUVs with 25 inch wheels and 40 aspect ratio tires.

  20. buzzboy7 says:

    I've yet to meet someone nice who owns one.
    <img src="http://www.motorstown.com/images/cadillac-escalade-02.jpg"&gt;

    • Devin says:

      I know a nice guy who has one, but his is unmodified. He bought it as a retirement present for himself.

      • buzzboy7 says:

        To once again show that most people are nice. It's the few a-holes that ruin it for the rest of us.

        Interesting choice of retirement present though…

        • Devin says:

          I think he just always wanted a Cadillac and also needed a way to tow a fishing boat. It's a pretty solid way for an old man to tour fishing spots in comfort.

      • SSurfer321 says:

        my neighbor has one and he's one of the nicest people i know.

    • CherokeeOwner says:

      Unmodified, these are acceptable (to a certain degree). Strangely, I usually see these pulling trailers full of gardening equipment more often than I see normal full-size pickups and SUVs. If you use an Escalade as something other than a fashion accessory/penis extender, docuhebaggery is probably non-existant.

      • buzzboy7 says:

        I agree wholeheartedly. My friends mom has an XL Denali which to me was always on the same level as the Escalade. It totes lumber, tows a boat, hauls dogs, fit an entire golf cart into etc.

    • Scandinavian Flick says:

      I actually plan to get one to beat the shit out of it off road. It's basically a Tahoe, but with a Lazy Boy for a seat, and pearl white paint.

      You can pick up one of the 1st gen ones for less than $4k.

    • Maymar says:

      Back when I worked for a GM dealer, Escalade owners spanned a pretty wide range from the douchebag you'd expect to pretty normal people. H2s were pretty much the same.

      On the other hand, my city's mayor recently traded a Chevy Uplander for a new Escalade, and he's such a rampant douchebag, he just got himself kicked out of office.

  21. TurboBrick says:

    I try not to judge others, because that gives them the green light do the same to me… and judging by the comments above I'm already in the running for the intergalactic a-hole of the year with my two Volvos and desire to own a newer one… HOWEVER…. it's really hard for me not to judge when I see a Hummer.

  22. Fritzo2162 says:

    The minute I see giant rims, I automatically want to punch the owner in the neck.

    <img src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_OsAgeaI8U2s/TIiIMII_qtI/AAAAAAAAAC0/IrM9BO_0X4k/s1600/41-wide-body-topo-dodge-chalenger%5B1%5D.jpg"&gt;

    • jib0582 says:

      I have one on 22" rims that are actually lighter than the factory 20" rims. I get compliments all the the time (mainly from older gents) and I swear I'm not a dbag. That setup in your pic is absolutely horrendous though…

    • ptschett says:


      (Could be worse… at least the car sits at a normal height. So it can be fixed.)

  23. Vavon says:

    Peugeot. Their owners just make me want to drive them off the road…
    <img src="http://www.ridedrive.co.uk/images/advanced-driving-tips/braking-part01/peugeot-wheel-liftoff.jpg"&gt;

  24. Trampster says:

    Picture it, 2 lanes of traffic approaching a junction. Approx 30 cars in left lane waiting to turn left, 4 cars in right lane waiting to make a right. Mr Idiot in his black BMW comes steaming down the right lane, waits for a green light, then gets his passenger to do a left turn arm signal & pushes his way across in front of everyone in the left lane. This is the type of thing,I see as a trucker every day here in the UK. By brand, a poll has voted BMW drivers the worst in Europe for the last 3 year's, with Audi in the 2nd place slot. Need I say more.

  25. GregKachadurian says:

    Most of my choices are already covered, so I'll add this in. I still fail to see why this is popular. I can't say I hate "Donk" owners as people though, just their tastes in cars.

    <img src="http://blog.1aauto.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/05/donk2.jpg"&gt;

    Guess what those "DB" stickers stand for? ;)

  26. Tanshanomi says:

    Miata owners. Always hitting on me.

  27. Officer Farva says:


    The majority of BMW owners I've encountered have been douchebags that don't use turn signals, tailgate and make all kinds of driving errors because they seem pretty fucking smug.

    • John says:

      Gotta exclude e30 owners from that stereotype. I'm a firm believer that all BMW drivers are either pricks or enthusiasts, and the vast majority of e30 owners fall into the latter category

    • HTWHLS says:

      I have a few friends who are die-hard BMW owners, of both older and newer models. They are certainly not dbags..but even they acknowledge that most of them, especially the newer model owners are total bags, with pissy attitudes. Largely posers, to boot. As much as it pains me to say it, BMW has cornered that market and anyone BMW afficionado who isn't, needs to brace themselves. There was a huge passel of these wanks at the last Caffeine and Octane in Alpharetta this past weekend.

  28. iBran says:

    Lexus and (modern) Toyota owners. Might as well take public transit if all you want is "something to get from point A to point B".

    Save for the LF-A, not a single model in their lineups has anything remarkable going for it. Boring cars for boring people.

  29. Mr. Queeg says:

    Hooray! no mentions for Lexus!
    Oops, should have kept quiet, let the hate begin.

  30. Ol'Shel' says:

    VW enthusiasts.

    It's not that I hate them, but I worry about people who have so much faith in cars that haven't been good since the early '80s.

    And even those '70s and '80s models drove the wrong set of wheels.

  31. KevinKiley says:

    this is obvious. Hummers.

  32. Sjalabais says:

    So how did this topic get so many answers in so short time? Maybe we shouldn't judge people on their rides.

    But then there is Audi…


  33. facelvega says:

    What's interesting to me is that cars that tended to connote douche when new tend to become quirky and/or charming after enough time has gone by. New Corvette? Only if you don't mind that people think you're a douche. C3 or earlier? No problem. 944 when new? Pretentious ass. When seven years old? Spoiled 20-ish choad. Now? Unpretentious car-loving guy. There are a million examples.

  34. Van_Sarockin says:

    Porsche people. It has to be said, since no one else will. Anal retentive, status conscious, compulsive spenders and clean freaks, every last one of them mother humpers, You know the guy, with the thinning, plugged combover, smoked aviator shades, silver windbreaker, gold chains, driving gloves and loafers. He's going to explain for the next hour how the smaller pitch of the contrasting seat stitching and chromed hose clamps on his ride elevates it above the other two hundred and seventy five thousand identical 911 whatevers.

    • Vairship says:

      I think this only applies to owners of new Porsches and people that take their Porsches to car shows. People that daily-drive their Porsches tend to be much better (especially 912s, 914s and other less pretentious Porsches).

  35. Slow_Joe_Crow says:

    As a motorcyclist I don't hate particular cars, I just fear them based on the likelihood of them being driven stupidly. In the early 90s it was Volvos since their reputation as tanks led to their drivers being oblivious. Now I fear minivans and soccer mom SUVs due to distracted driving and bro trucks for testosterone induced stupidity.
    That said, newish BMWs do seem to generate a lot of dbaggerey, although I am pleased to say that BMW motorcycles are the polar opposite.

    • sporty88au says:

      So very true. SUV drivers are the new Volvo drivers. Also I'd throw anything popular with the tuner crowd into the 'testosterone induced stupidity' category.

  36. e46christopher says:

    e46christopher crosses fingers not to find too much BMW hate. Only 4 mentions so far — I'm not a douche … really!

  37. Devin says:

    I challenge you to look at this and not think "D-bag"

    <img src="http://www.all-car-brands.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/06/daihatsu_d_bag_4-1.jpg"&gt;

    (I don't think they actually manufactured them.)

  38. kevin says:

    i dislike gm cars but i hate people who drive shitzuki's

  39. NotADouche says:

    In this order:
    1. BMW
    2. Audi
    3. Acura
    4. Insert your favorite luxury SUV here.

  40. Brian says:

    Geez! What's left then? You guys have eliminated pretty much every nice, fun to drive car on the market. Sounds like the only way to avoid looking like a douche to you guys is to drive a Camry or Accord, or minivan for that matter.

  41. Lex says:

    The world is full of douchebags, and most of them drive cars.

    It's been stated multiple times in this thread, but there's a lot of variability. Lots of douchebaggery behind the roundel, but do i automatically count as a douchebag because i own a '91 318is? Probably not, right? Now i might be assumed if my BMW was 21 years younger than it is. And i might assume that of most brand new BMW owners, but i'm generally a misanthrope and assume people to be stupid assholes until they prove otherwise.

    My top two on this list would be clean, over-lifted trucks and WRX/STIs. That's probably because those are what i see where i live. We've got a handful of new BMWs in town, one summer house owner with a Lambo (which he putters around at 25 in and i keep hoping to watch catch fire), and i think two newer Porsches and a few Boxers (i know both Boxer owners, one is a douche and the other a really nice guy who also maintains a '68 Cougar). My e30 is one of three in town, and by far the nicest … i'm not going to call the guy who drives is vert e30 all friggin winter a douche when mine's in storage.

  42. CarNDriver says:

    Not a douche because you own a bimmer. Just because you drive one.

  43. Whine says:

    Cars that give off a Douchey vibe (even if nice people own them)

    Jeep Wranglers-especially when lifted or near the ocean.

    Any diesel pickup. Especially when fitted with stacks or a lift kit. (I like regular diesels, it's just the vibe)


    Plymouth panthers.

    Mitsubishi Eclipses.

    Anything "Stance" or "hellaflush"

    Anything with a fart can. Most notably, civics.

    All car-trucks: el caminos, that modern Chevy whatever, etc.

    All cheap, old diesels (i like them, and they are practical but can you say hippy-douche?)

    Scion Xb (my phone even tried to auto-correct that to xbox) and tc

    Now I will get flamed for this but the Cadillac cts-v. Amazing car but highly Douchey.

    Veloster, genesis coupe



    Used cop cars (the tailgate you douche)

    Kia soul

  44. HTWHLS says:

    It truly hurts to say it, but owning a brace of C5's exposed to be a load of douche-iness I never expected. After a couple of years, I stopped going to "Corvette Only" events for that reason, (unless they were to benefit charity). Someone mentioned how piping color and claimps were used to try and explain the difference between the exact same cars – man..that's Corvette d-bagginess too!

    It's sad as it doesn't need to be like that..but it is. I still love my C5 and nothing makes me laugh out loud or puts a smile you can't remove without a 2X4 on my face like taking it out for a ride…maybe getting it sideways through a turn or just cruising effortlessly at 85 with the stereo cranking SRV…but …yes, the taint of dbag is always there.

  45. garytherival says:

    Any Mustang with the 4.0L V6. They always think they're driving the pinnacle of automotive design and performance.

  46. Shortthrow says:

    1. Lifted diesel pickups "rollin' coal". They should stick every one of those f*ckers in the nearest crusher–maybe their Ed Hardy dragon shirt-wearing owners too.

    2. Hummer of any variety, but particularly H2 & H3 models.

    3. Any small or mid-level Audi/BMW/Acura, particularly the "S, M or Type R" varieties.

    4. Mercedes CLA, GL and GLK (great video on YouTube if you type in "Mercedes enthusiasts reaction to the CLA").

    5. Any Land Rover not driven by an African or Australian bushman. Particularly a RR Sport or LR3/4 driven by a non-female. Discos are ok and fullfat Rangies are ok too, because you probably work on your Disco yourself and hell, the fullfat Rangie does royal service along with the stuff from Crewe so it passes muster in my book, but most dudes I see cruising in RR Sports or LR4s have the true douche thing going and typically drive them like assholes, particularly hauling balls away from every stoplight–no wonder the govt is up all the car makers' asses about improving fuel economy, because any 'Murican with a giant ass SUV drives it like a Gallardo—GL, Suburban and Tahoe drivers included.

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