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Hooniverse Classic Captions – The Classic Volvo PV-444 Edition

Welcome to the Hooniverse Classic Captions Post. This is a series of posts that appear at this time every Tuesday, and it seems like you’re enjoying this feature, so let’s review the premise; I search for images that were used by the car companies in their print advertising or brochures, and it is your job to provide a humorous, snarky, or thought provoking caption that is some how tied in with the image. We have been getting a lot of participation, so why not join in the fun this week (it’s a really good time, I promise!)

Last week, we had an image of several Catholic School Girls admiring a Chevy, and the comments were both interesting as well as very funny, and not as disturbing as I thought they could have been. Friend of Hooniverse boostedlegowgn came up with this very funny caption: “The Chevy Laguna Type S-3. Its 0 to 60 time isn’t very good, but you’ll get 5 to 10 in a blink.” Very well played boostedlegowgn!.

But the winner this time around is our long time motorcycle enthusiast Tanshanomi, who came up with this puzzling comment: “I gotta take this into the shop. That damn magnet needs recalibration.” You know, I really don’t get it, but the rest of you seem to, so congratulations Tanshanomi!

It’s now time to take a look at this weeks illustration. This is a publicity image for the Volvo PV 444. It was one of a series of post cards printed by Volvo in 2004 celebrating their 60th anniversary, and this image has it all… Classic Volvo, Classic Swedish Beauty, Classic Handsome Swedish Dude, and I bet that beverage in the Thermos is Very Strong Swedish Coffee. This must have been one of the three days in which there is a Summer in Sweden, and it is a very classic way to sell a car in any environment. But what do you think of it? (You can click here to see the full size image)

You have the next five days to come up with a great caption. The editors will deliberate entries, and after looking through old photography to find our own Swedish Beauties, we will pronounce a winner. So, get to work and create you’re own caption for this Summer in Sweden.

Photo Credit: Alden Jewell’s Flickr Photostream

Currently there are "49 comments" on this Article:

  1. Alff says:

    See honey? I told you your Volvo could handle the sand.

  2. CptSevere says:

    Honey, you're looking pretty white. You'd better put on some heavy duty sunscreen, or you'll be the same color as the Volvo in no time at all. Even though we're inside on a make-believe beach.

  3. $kaycog says:

    Yay, Tanshanomi, on your win! I have for you a Chevelle SS as shown by this lady whose cups runneth over.

    <img src="http://www.fquick.com/images/pics/7809.jpg"width="500"/&gt;

  4. danleym says:

    Her: You know, I've had a really fun first date, I like your new Volvo, the coffee tastes great, the beach is lovely, but why are you just standing over there staring at me with a weird grin on your face?

    Him: Oh, I'm just trying to let something settle down, I mean help something settle down- the springs! Yes! I need to put some weight over the front end to help these new springs settle down, the car's sitting kind of high. Yeah, that's it. It's just the, uh, springs, that need to settle down. Nope, nothing going on with me at all…

  5. P161911 says:

    No Sweetheart, this isn't a '47 Ford.

  6. $kaycog says:

    "Björn, you can quit hiding behind the Volvo. I've already seen your umbrella trick."

  7. Number_Six says:

    It wasn't always sunny on the beaches of Skane, but with Agata's husband buried in the sand under the Volvo, she and Jesper really didn't mind.

  8. Devin says:

    Has this ever happened to you? Take a lovely young lady to the beach on your first date, and then your swim trunks tear, right in the crotch! You find yourself awkwardly hiding behind cars, umbrellas, thermoses, anything you can find, because you know she's just not that kind of girl! Never let that happen again with Haggar swim trunks! These fine trunks are made from our patented anti-tear technology, so she won't see what you're hiding, until the time is right, that is!

  9. Tanshanomi says:

    Sven was thrilled when Frida invited him to the beach. He'd already seen her swimsuit, and he was hoping to get a good look at her Volvo.

  10. Irishzombieman says:

    Still waiting patiently, Volvo, for a PV 666. You might want to hurry up a bit.

    <img src="http://image.toutlecine.com/photos/d/a/m/damien-la-malediction-2-1978-01-g.jpg&quot; width=400>

  11. E: Astrid….
    A: Yes dear….Erik..
    E: Let´s go børk! børk! børk! behind the umbrella….
    A: Only if is as safe as our Volvo…

  12. Irishzombieman says:

    So I said to the bosses, "We can't call our car company 'Fjord'. We'll get our asses sued off!" Then Gustav made a horrible joke using an English word for certain female body parts and. . . well, you know how it goes with men drinking vodka. The name just sort of stuck. Even now, you say "Volvo" at directors' meetings and twenty guys giggle.

  13. jezeus says:

    "Damn, I should've bought a Duett."

  14. needthatcar says:

    The Volvo P444 makes even Mickey Rooney look tall.

  15. Scandinavian Flick says:

    Pictured: One 50s pinup girl and two Swedish meatballs.

  16. Don'tcallmeShirley says:

    Olga admired Sven's dashing new Volvo while Sven deftly measured the wheel to fender gap.

  17. muthalovin says:

    Beaches love the P444.

  18. engineerd says:

    I showed you my Volvo, now it's time for you to show me yours.

  19. Irishzombieman says:

    Trying hard not to make a Ray Wert joke. . .

  20. wisc47 says:

    No one likes a sandy Volvo, except for Bjorn…

  21. boostedlegowgn says:

    Always a safety leader, here is an early example of a Volvo being used as a contraceptive.

  22. Batshitbox says:

    [youtube Qf9CC7NXeZQ http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qf9CC7NXeZQ youtube]

    I'll think up a caption later, until then enjoy some Swedish Chef and Swedish Heavy Metal.

    (And I thought Korpiklaani were Finns)

    • Dean Bigglesworth says:

      Not sure if sarcasm, but Korpiklaani is indeed from Finland. Since you've heard of them you probably know this anyway, but most of their lyrics have something to do with Finnish folklore and mythology.

      • Batshitbox says:

        Yeah, my search criteria were Swedish Chef Swedish Metal and this is what came up. Although the video title doesn't say 'Swedish Metal', that was in my head. I was in a bit of a rush and just threw the parenthetical statement in there to cover my bases.

        I looked up Korpiklaani on wikipedia soon after that and confirmed their Finnishness, but had no time to correct it.

  23. skitter says:

    Why no dear, there's nothing at all on the other side. It's all rocks, freezing water, naked people, and anyway no one you know.

  24. Tomsk says:

    <img src="http://images.fanpop.com/images/image_uploads/Abba-abba-64001_1024_768.jpg&quot; width="500" />

    Ooooooooooo you can drive, you can driiive
    License plate ending in fiiive
    Ooooo see that car
    Hear me preach
    Diggin' the Volvo Beach

  25. TurboBrick says:

    "Isn't the Swedish summer great? It must be 15 degrees Celsius out here!"
    "Åke, stop shivering against the hood and come have a hot cup of coffee while you enjoy the sun"

  26. Gooberpeaz says:

    Per and Birgit practice their Volvo 'face' impressions while enjoying the 30 minutes of annual beach weather in Sweden.

  27. C³-Cool Cadillac Cat says:

    They'll never track this license plate number…

  28. Batshitbox says:

    That's not a Duett and we're not gonna neither.

  29. POLAЯ says:

    "Gee-a Selly, yuoo knoo zee Piffff fuoor fuoor fuoor is Fulfu's furst unee-budy cer."

    "Vhy yes I du, it's elsu pooered by a furty hurse-a pooer oone-a pueent fuoor leetre-a inleene-a-4 ingeene-a deseegneted zee be-a-fure-a-be-a, veet three-a meeen beereengs, ooferheed felfes, und a seengle-a doondrefft cerbooretur!"




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