Why do they all have to be Automatics?
12 valves of power delivered straight from the heavens.
Please welcome the second of a few new contributors, Ray Lindenburg. Ray comes to us from his own website, hatchtopia.com, which is, surprisingly, about hatchbacks. Please make Ray feel equally welcome and awkward at the same time, as you did Scott. -KK
I saw my high school dream car on eBay last night. It was exactly as I remembered all those many years ago. Sleek sheet metal wrapped around a high tech interior. It figured in to a major motion picture as a car from the future – fitted with the latest in automotive gadgetry. Nice color combination. Low miles. Automatic transmission.
Damnit!
Another bubble burst. I had seen another lustworthy car up for auction a few weeks back – an oddball to be sure, but still cool in my mind. Fully loaded, rare leather seats, low miles. Automatic transmission.
I’m not a car snob. I have no room to be. Fact is, if I told a wide audience what cars I liked, I’d probably be whisked away to a padded room somewhere. What I consider cool, most would view as nerdy. Ugly. Weird. It’s okay, there will be more of these gems on eBay to droll over. So what. I’ll take the risk. I like strange cars and I’m no longer ashamed to hide it. The car I saw on eBay last night?
Wheels. That's all it needs. Otherwise, it's perfect.
The Ford Probe checked all the boxes for me when I was just-before-driving age. Pop-up headlights, hatchback, turbocharger, low, sleek looks. But the truth of the matter was, that even if I ever got my grubby hands on the keys to my own Ford Probe, there was no way in hell it would be the GT turbo. Even at 16, I was the practical sort – I knew that the insurance payments would bankrupt me. The eBay auction in question features the mid-grade LX. Nicer interior than the base GL, but the same powerplant: a 2.2 liter, 12 valve four putting down a thundering 110 horses. With a manual transmission, it would be a decent performer, able to get out of its own way while returning good gas mileage. With the automatic? Perish the thought.
I certainly would have caught a rash from my high school buddies. Don’t think I hadn’t heard all the Probe double-entendre. It was high school after all. Hell, I could imagine some of my current 30-something friends getting a good giggle out of me pulling up in a Probe today. Worse, my particular school parking lot was comprised of at least 25% Ford Mustang variants*. There were late-model four cylinders, 5.0s, four cylinders tarted up to look like 5.0s, LXs, GTs, older Mustang IIs, 60s classics, fastbacks, notchbacks, hatchbacks, convertibles, the whole gamut. The Mustang, and to a lesser extent, the Camaro, were the alpha dogs at my Midwestern high school.
And then, if it were up to me, the four-cylinder, front-wheel-drive, Japanese presumptive one-time replacement for their beloved ride. A tin-can economy car poseur trying not only to play with, but usurp the alpha dog. With an automatic no less. I can visualize the twitching eyes and red faces now. Even had I ponied up (yeah I did) and gotten that stonkin’ turbo version, with its 145 horses and 7.0 second 0-60 time, I would have had to park in the fenced-in teacher’s lot.
There was a small contingent of foreign car aficionados at my high school – if I’d just settle for the Probe twin, the Mazda MX-6, I could fit in with them. But I liked the hatchback. And the blue oval on the rounded snout. Ever since my dad bought a beater F-150 when I was 9, I was a Ford guy. I’d learned to drive on deserted mountain dirt roads in that rig – before the family had moved to the wilds of the Kansas City suburbs. It had an automatic.
But the Probe was stuck in an automotive no-man’s land – shunned by Ford and foreign car fans alike. There was, of course, another option – the refined and fast 5-door Mazda 626, on which both the Probe and MX-6 were based. No, said high school Ray – that’s something my parents would drive. And in my defense the 626 GT was, even at that time, rare as hen’s teeth.
Remember when a red stripe meant "sporty?"
The silver exterior is fine. Not my first choice, but not bad either. If I had my druthers, I’d have the red over funhouse red. Yes, a red interior. What ever happened to those? Nowadays, cars are either funeral black or funeral gray. Or maybe beige. But let’s be honest, the only time you should have beige on the interior is if you have British Racing Green on the exterior.
Sigh.
Imagine the subwoofer box you could fit in there...
Red. And in perfect condition. It is my firm belief that more cars should have red interiors. But then again, if more did, red wouldn’t be as special. Perhaps I’ll just hoard some for myself…
But that transmission… Was it put there to prevent me from walking out the door with a plane ticket in one hand and a checkbook in the other? I’ve done that one before. Let’s just say it didn’t end well. My new purchase broke down catastrophically four times in the state of New Mexico alone – the third in a five state rolling disaster area. I’m pretty sure that the EPA created at least two new Superfund sites as a result of that trip. My patient and loving wife threatened divorce if I ever tried that again.
So I’m pretty sure that it’s a good thing that whenever I see an interesting car, there’s some dealbreaker that prevents me from the above plane ticket/checkbook scenario – this time with the wife hollering behind me to not come back. Truth is, I do have some self-control. It’s not like I’d just go and pick up the next available Probe, or MX-3, or Prizm hatchback I happened to see within non-plane-trip distance.
I’ve got no place to park it.
*74.3% of all statistics are made up on the spot.
Related posts:
A lot of the survivors are automatic equipped because they have led sheltered lives usually at the hands of elderly owners. 70s Japanese cars (outside of Datsun Zs perhaps) are even worse – most of what is left is saddled with an automatic plus the parts cars that would have been used for a conversion have long been crushed.
A first-gen Probe? I hardly ever see one of those anymore. Remember when Ford said this was going to replace the Mustang, and the faithful went for their torches and pitchforks?
Welcome. I just went through your site: you are going to fit just fine here.
Thanks! I think I make for a good fit, but that'll be for everyone else to decide.
Fact is, if I told a wide audience what cars I liked, I’d probably be whisked away to a padded room somewhere. What I consider cool, most would view as nerdy. Ugly. Weird.
Don't worry. You're safe here. Mr Harrell probably has you beat in this respect, and the rest of us love his car collection.
Yeah, safety isn't a problem. The walls are nicely padded here and the attendants always have some calming drugs around. Too bad they were on holiday when the Z-natics launched their attack the other day.
You must be thinking of someone else. All of my cars are beautiful.
That's the first time I've seen the full date (04/25/88) on a GVWR sticker. Usually it's just month and year. What town is that "Spalding" emblem say? I can't read it.
Not that I can read it, but I'm guessing Griffin, GA – they had a Spalding Ford (or so say the Googles).
I can forgive the automatic. I can't forgive the front wheel drive. Butt draggers are not sports cars and never will be.
I've never really been able to get behind the whole FWD hate, suppose having far too much behind the wheel of the FWD cars I have owned explains that.
I think you just accidentally the whole comment.
The worst part of that is that you're convinced the word is still there, so you stare at the comment going "What is he talking about? It makes sense!" and then no, no it doesn't.
Platform bigots are really narrow and dull.
Toyota Quick Delivery is narrow and dull.
<img src="http://picture1.goo-net.com/7000800812/20111212/J/70008008122011121200200.jpg">
(jkIthinkthey'reneat)
Mon Dieu. . . How does it not fall over?
A quick search reveals it's approximately 70 in wide x 103 inches tall x 202 in long, assuming I'm interpreting the dimensions properly.
Yeah, that is neat. ikindawantone.
Wow, I've never seen anything quite like that.
I sure wish I had the '69 Toronado right now, that we had when I was a kid. That car would make a believer out of you, whether it was a sports car or not. Blue smoky burnouts are cool, whether the smoke comes from the front wheels or the rear.
It's the FWD that loses you and not the 110hp/Automatic pairing? Nothing wrong with a sporty FWD car – fun to drive, commuter friendly.
That's OK, Ray, we don't judge around here (snicker, insert rude joke). Hell, Ford Tempo Fanatic is practically our mascot. But quite a way to put it all on the table from the outset.
That said, the Probe isn't such a bad car. More an example of a stillborn potential future of zoomier looking cars, that got sideswiped by blobs and now piscine shapes. A friend of mine had a Probe back in school. He really liked it. And I thought it was fine, except for the pretty barebones dash.
The lack of manuals greatly restricts my car searches. If only there was an AAMCO to do two-hour auto-to-manual swaps into the ride of your choice for a low flat fee, that left your interior intact. I hate losing the gas mileage and control over the car, especially in snowy conditions. But most people in the US want the auto, even when it was a $1,000 option. And now it's a near impossibility to find a manual car on a lot. The future is dark, indeed.
That's why I bought new actually – I want a manual, but even finding a decent used car around here is difficult, buying a used manual you might have better luck finding the ark of the covenant. So I pretty much was forced to special order.
Most definitely agree with your potential comment – the Probe could have been great with more development. It was a very compromised car from Day 1 – the barebones dash was due to the high cowl dictated by the Mazda platform, as were the weird little lumps in the hood above the shock towers. Ford designers wanted a more sleek look than the Mazda could deliver. Second generation got a little better, then the plug was pulled. Of course, the Mercury Cougar was supposed to be a "world car" replacement, but that's a story for another day.
Been a long since I've seen him in these parts.
Yeah, I'm a little worried. I think he still has his Tempos (Tempi?), but he's also bought an F150 – for no particular reason in an Alaskan winter – and shows serious signs of sliipping into being an actual trainspotter. He might also have descended into working for a living (shudder). We may have to do an intervention.
Versions of this engine can be found in zillions of fork lifts…I was amazed when I first discovered this.
My Mom's '89 626 had a manual transmission. Believe me, you can get into some real trouble in that car. But the turbo 626 with 4-wheel-steering was the one to have. Look how tasty the get with shorter springs and naasty wheels:
<img src="http://bilder.wibla.net/albums/626GD/DSC_9436_web.sized.jpg">
drool…
The way I usually waste my time on the classifieds is to set the distance to include the whole country, then when I find a couple nice ones I narrow it down to local distances. Then when I do I narrow it to manuals if it applies. Then if a good one's still there I
make plans for transportation to and storage of the carcheck up on the ad like a crazed stalker. (K, fine, I do both…) Then I look at my bank account and shake my head. Then the ad disappears.I want a garage. Or just a pad of concrete; I'm not picky.
Isn't the 4-speed Ford autobox the least reliable component ever fitted on anything Mazda or Mazda-related?
Maybe, but Mazda made up for it by giving fords the Super-destructo 5-speed for use in the Explorer.
Not to mention the crappy, poor-shifting five-speed manual used in the first-generation Taurus SHO.
And the awful Mazda-designed M5-R2 5-speed used in the F-150 pickups. Here's a common PM procedure to avoid losing all the gear oil and grenading one:
http://www.ford-trucks.com/article/idx/9/059/arti…
There are 2 reasons for all the automatics:
1: because they are dead easy to swap to manual trans. I did a 323 with not so much as a hanes guide or a power tool in less than 12 hours.
2: Because all of those turbos and 12-valve heads need to be grafted on to the top of B2200s.
1. My uncle had an all black Probe GT from that year and an aunt of mine had a beige LX. Great cars. fun to drive and pretty fast.
2. Which KC suburb? I was in Leawood in the early 90s.
Lee's Summit. Graduated from LSHS in '93.
This is the sticker I have on my car …
<img src="https://dpegb9ebondhq.cloudfront.net/product_photos/385762/IMG_6990_large.JPG">
(image from <a href="http://gearheadshirts.com)” target=”_blank”>http://gearheadshirts.com)
I have this on my cars:
<img src="http://drh2.img.digitalriver.com/DRHM/Storefront/Company/hfmedia/images/product/detail/STM-Sticker_220_.jpg">
Just ordered several. Thanks for the tip!
I had one on my car. Someone swiped it.
I've also got the pin on a bag – some woman in a coffee shop wanted to know where she could get one, thinking it was about user manuals.
Trivia: The Connecticut State Police looked into using the Probe as a patrol car. But they deemed the door to be too long. When it pulled over someone else and the driver's side door was open, passersby might clip it. So they bought a bunch of MX-6s instead.
No shit.
I actually remember seeing a print article about the MX-6s – had not heard the reasoning behind them over the Probe, however.
Get your plane ticket, I'll help you swap that slushbox.
You sir, are a bad man.
You sir, are a good man.
My oldest friend recently parted ways with his second generation Probe. His was the most reliable ride chalking up close to 300k on the odometer (with original clutch and no major engine work). The 110hp four was definitely not fast but dead relaible and smooth. The rust fairy finally claimed his ride.
Boy, I totally didn't see that one coming. Based on the lead-in description I was expecting a Delorean DMC-12.
You got the movie right…
<img src="http://www.imcdb.org/i011630.jpg">
Hey, I already did it. http://hooniverse.com/2011/04/07/stainless-steel-…
I have been driving for almost thirty years and I got my very first autotragic just last year…..
….and I love the thing.
Now I will admit that an Audi DSG auto is a long way from a mkI Probe slush box, but I fail to see the hate.
The Probe is barely 'sporting', more of a tourer than an autoX weapon, certainly not really a track toy either, so surely the slush box is purely a convenience item ?
If you are serious about turning it into a quick car for 'beyond the street' use, then the list of things to do includes liberating a lot more power, which will probably start with pulling the boat anchor out of the engine bay. So while you are in there it would probably be a good idea to replace the slush box with something that will not implode when you break into triple digit HP gains.
Personally I'd buy it based on the condition of the tough to fix bits – the pain and the interior look great, the oily bits are easy compared to welding in a new floor (etc)
The DSG is a pretty good unit. I've driven some GTIs/A3s and they're video game kinda fun. Don Istook was racing a DSG GTI in SCCA. With a tuner chip, it behaved like a manual trans. For good and bad (downshift too soon = overrev).
The old transmissions were slow to shift, too fluid for enthusiasts. Today's autos are worlds better than the old stuff.
My old 5000 had a trans leak and once it was down to half a tank, it shifted pretty strong. Killed the trans but it felt great!
Just run what you brung. I've had to drag me slushbox around the track due to the other car being down, and there's two big drawbacks. Accidental downshift in a corner due to low revs – say you're holding the auto in second, but your speed and revs drop enough in a curve to bump it into first. Worse, you just can't short shift an auto box at WOT.
Yeah, I prefer a manual, but is it really worth the work? Slushers are a lot of fun when you shift 'em manually, and can do interesting things with a turbo… can you say brake torque? I say hoon around in her until the right car, born with a manual, comes along.
When the first Probe came to the local dealer, I dragged my dad to take a look at it. The marketing said it was the hottest thing since the T-Bird and Mustang. So he had to see what the big deal was. Salesman was all into the shtick, I was collecting Focus brochures, dad just shook his head… "What the hell kinda name is 'Probe'?"
For $3k, I'd be all over this car. It's a time machine!
Glad to have you here, great first post!
Thanks!
Wow! A whole site dedicated to the most awesome body style ever conceived by man? Count me (and my AMC Spirit liftback and 2 Geo Metros) in!
Several years back, I bought a '91 Probe with a slushie for $100 (imagine this car as a beater), with dreams of swapping a manual in (my dreams are much more capable than my actual skills). Obviously, that never happened, but I still drove it around a bit, and it was rather pleasant. Wasn't about to light my hair on fire, but I could see it being fun hustled (felt more solid and planted than the Escort I also owned at the time).
TBH, the door swings both ways. Over here, automatics have been rare and ever after my mom decided she didn't like shifting gears that much, it was somewhat difficult to find her a good, low-mileage used car. For five years, she's been trundling along in a 1998 MKIV Golf that still hasn't eaten its autobox, and it seems to be they're going to keep the car for a long time since it doesn't rust and servicing it in Estonia is cheap.
Sounds like the basis for a great import/export business: You send us the manuals, and we'll send you the automatics. Almost as important would be all the linkages, consoles and trim bits to make for a tidy installation.
I had an '89 Probe GL 5-sp for my first car in high school (Class of "94). The only options it had were Power Mirrors and aftermarket Cruise Control that wouldn't set higher than 60 MPH. Of course I had added a killer stereo (that trunk could hold a huge sub box), but didn't really do anything else in the way of mods. I had begged my dad for a manual, and I'm eternally grateful he obliged. Although if he hadn't, maybe I wouldn't end up having to drive halfway across the country every time I buy a new-to-me car to find an increasingly rare MT. It was a pretty fun car, felt faster than it was, and handled reasonably well. And it looked fast, which was important at 16. I learned how to rotate the rear end with lift-throttle oversteer, and it was by far the best e-brake turner of the 12 cars I've owned. Might have had something to do with the 4/$100 tires. That LX interior looks to be a huge step up from my GL. I worked for a Honda dealer at the time, and the head detailer showed me how to make the car really shine. I took a lot of pride in the number of people who thought it was a brand new car, even with 80k+ miles. It was a remarkably durable car, surviving both me and my extremely car-careless brother, finally dying at the hands of my cousin somewhere in the mid 100k range. The only mechanical issue I know of before my cousin killed it was a spark plug that decided to liberate itself from the head while I was driving to school. A local guy retapped it for me for $100, which I thought seemed like a lot. Now that's what I pay for an oil change. I replaced it with a '91 G20, which really changed my perspective on the build quality and handling prowess of the Probe. I later drove a '93 for about a year, and while it was a much better car in many ways, I didn't like it nearly as much. Spoiled I guess.
If I ever get to do LeMons or ChumpCar, the 1st gen Probe will be my first choice.
This is a fine example of how to integrate a new contibutor into the maze. A wonderful article, and lots of great comments, on a wonderful example of automotive engineering 'direct' from Dearborn MI. ..
One car that makes me cringe every time I see one pull into my shop….
"Please, Please, Please, let them be looking for directions to the beach."
Welcome to the party….pretty cool place to visit and stay awhile….just around back, about a half mile from the railway track…..