Car buying question: Is the era of the new-car surprise gone?
A good friend is currently shopping for his next automobile. We’ve chatted about a few possibilities, and he seems ready to move to test drives at local dealerships. Problem is, he is also discussing the purchase with his wife, as one should on something major like this. However, she doesn’t like much, hates dealerships, hates wagons, doesn’t see the need to test drive, thinks everything looks cheap. The original idea was to buy a sedan, now they’re examining sport utility vehicles, and he doesn’t know what else might wind up on the agenda.
My friend’s next question to me was, when did we stop heading out to dealerships on our own, only to return later with a surprise in the driveway. He feels that if he could just handle this entire purchase on his own, everything would run smoothly.
When did the era of the “Honey look what I’ve just bought” car shopping trip fade away? Is it tied to the economy, meaning when times are good, so are the surprise gifts?
[Image source: Custom Cloud Story]
The great news is if your wife gets on your case for spending too much, there are always auto refinancing options available that can help.
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A market research study that I read in 2002 stated that the respondents stated a woman (she, or wife) had the final say in the purchase for over 60% of all car purchases. I can only assume it is higher now.
I assume the change happened around the same time divorces for "irreconcilable differences" could come with lifetime alimony awards.
I think any dual income family requires a "Honey, I'm thinking…" discussion. If one spouse is the sole bread winner, they get to make purchases sans consultation….
I accidently thumbed down, damn touchscreen. You are correct, when your spouse is the other major investor, you better consult. Otherwise she will bring home her favorite vehicle without warning you.
My wife gets so fed up with my car purchasing process. Basically we've finally come to a system where I find the cars, present them to her and she gets to veto my choice (of vehicle she's supposed to drive). So far she's invoked her veto right on a Crown Victoria that I was seriously considering in '08 at the height of the gas crunch.
Jeff, I really like this question. Honestly, you should pose this question on Tuesday when we return to our regularly scheduled program.
That said, I think that the internet has really made the dealership test-drive obsolete. That, and you bloggers. With reviews and photos and videos, we (the rubes) do not need to see said auto in person. Just have a taxi drop us off, sign some papers and drive off.
It does seem you can just a much from a bunch of reviews as you can from a 5-10minute test drive. As Maymar mentions "fit" is important, but you can do test that in the showroom.
i do think if I had done a better test drive for my 2011 Silverado I might have spent the extra $900 for the 4.8L V-8 instead of the gutless 4.3L V-6. The V-6 is fine at any speed above about 20mph, but the 0-20mph acceleration will just about get you killed. I was nice on the test drive an only used about 50% of the throttle. Little did I know that the 51-100% of throttle only yielded about a 5% gain in 0-20mph acceleration.
I don't think the internet can make the test drive obsolete, at least for me. There have been a few cases of cars that are good on paper that I decided I couldn't live with after a test drive, and others where a car I wasn't expecting to care for turned out to be much more appealing in real life.
It has made dealers themselves largely pointless, if I'm going to buy something I know the exact spec I want from online, so what are they there for?
Agreed wholeheartedly.
Nowadays, I think just about any savvy new-car buyer (myself included on the last go-round) will be walking into a showroom with an exact spec in mind, a price they're aiming to pay (based on similar car sales in that area), and maybe some specific ideas of what they're willing to fudge on in order to make the deal.
All that said, internet research cannot really tell you about what it is to drive, or to live with, any car in question. Reading about how the car drives is one thing. Actually getting in, adjusting the seat, looking around (and checking for blind spots…) smelling the upholstery, hearing the engine, and finding out whether you and the car actually suit each other is something else entirely. Maybe the new information age has made the test drive obsolete for some, but for me, and I'd expect, for most enthusiasts (well, the subset of enthusiasts who still buy new cars…), it's the most valuable piece of research you can do. I cannot and will not buy a car without having actually driven one. If it's all about the driving experience, how can you possibly consider yourself an informed buyer without ever getting behind the wheel?
Sorry for the rant — I'm maybe a little too passionate about the whole "get to know the car" thing.
I call that the Infiniti problem. They look great on paper, but every one I've ever been in has felt so disgustingly cheap and blindly designed that I wanted to get out as quickly as possible. Numbers can lie.
Times they are a'changin'. I think the financial situation of many people precludes that sort of surprise. And I don't just mean in recent years, but as a developing trend of further and further extended credit. I'd imagine that a large portion of America doesn't get financing without a spouse co-signing on the loan. Two incomes means a bigger loan and a better car right?
I would say that perhaps there are other issues at play in the story of your 'friend.' My personal spouse has similar feelings about going to the dealership, and does trend toward being better at expressing dislikes when it comes to decision making, but would be perfectly content for me to handle the looking and test driving and negotiations and just show up at home with the new car.
Potbellyjoe, you made me laugh with your single income comment there. As the de facto head of a single income family I can assure you that is in no way the way it works around here! But that could maybe just be me…
We'd both have a say no matter what the current income configuration was. Strangely enough, I was unemployed when we bought both our cars. For the Civic, she had a strong opinion, and for the Jeep, she let me take care of it. For both of them, we had the "honey, I'm thinking…" and "Ok, let's work out the budget…" discussions. And even though I wasn't bringing in income at the time, I had a say in both purchases. I also wouldn't dare bring a car home as a surprise if she lost her job and we needed to replace the Civic. Also, we'll probably want both of us signing on the loan for a new car were we to replace the Civic (but that's unlikely, as that car is only 5 years old and hasn't hit 50k on the clock).
We also ignored Consumer Reports for both of them (or rather, we looked at what CU had to say and then dismissed most of their advice).
I gladly cede the day to day family financial management to the wife. So like you I am not about to buy without a consult. In my new age estimation the minute we got married all the things became our things, money included.
This question reminded me of something I had forgotten about, the warning I gave my wife when we first started dating. I told her I wasn't good with money, and was into old cars.
The first thing we ironed out within probably the first year. I don't think she understood the depths of the second for years. I still try to make automotive decisions that involve moving $100 rusty hulks cross country that leave her shaking her head.
Good question. Things are much different nowadays than in my grandmother's day. Back then the husband was the sole breadwinner and "head of the house". Now women are more on an equal footing with men and have more of a say in all aspects of a marriage, including finances. This all probably started in the late early 1900's with women getting the right to vote. That's my take on it.
My grandmother was a good example of what you're talking about. She became a widow at 55 in 1965 having never driven a car, much less purchased one. My father taught her to drive and my uncle taught her bookkeeping as she had never managed a checking account (or written a check). She got herself a job as a cashier in the cafeteria of a local elementary school which she held for about 35 years before retiring. Her first car, a 1967 Chevelle 2-door hardtop, became my first car in 1977 with only 66,000 miles on it. It was pretty much the epitome of the "little old lady driving to church on Sundays" car. She passed away a few years ago just 3 weeks shy of her 100th birthday. RIP Addie Mae, I miss you.
That's pretty much the way it was back then. Thanks for sharing that.
this was not the case for my Grandmother, and many of the other women in Detroit and other large cities. since we were the arsenal of democracy and also have an unusually high percentage of car girls who were also "Rosie the Riveters", many women have been choosing and buying their own cars since at least the 1950s. the women in my family would always choose their own cars, and the men would do the same, with the family or childrens' needs in mind.
a woman that car girls of all ages can look up to:
http://video.nytimes.com/video/2011/07/08/automob…
Women have always played a role in major household decisions. Don't let some henpcked guy try to tell you different. You made the decision all on your own? That's only because she wanted you to think that.
"Surprised" has always meant something different than 'appalled" to me. That photo illustrates some of the tragedy that arises when men make important decisions without women's advice.
As soon as divorce became more common placed and more expensive than said impromptu purchase.
In spite of what Lexus Christmas commercials might imply, was bringing home something major without spousal pre-approval EVER a good idea? I can't think of a single couple I've ever met where bringing something expensive like a car home (or even something inexpensive like home electronics) without a discussion first didn't lead to some major doghouse living. Hell, I know of a couple or two that complain about something stupid their spouse bought without consultation decades ago still today, as though they need to remind them not to do it again. Hell, my dad once complained about curtains my mom bought without asking him for an entire year until she gave in and found some window coverings they could both get behind, and those are cheap and they've been married for over 40 years. The curtains were pretty annoying, so he had a point, and probably wouldn't have cared if they weren't really annoying, but still!
I bought a LeMons car without asking my wife… brought it to Tim's house though.
I had a friend that surprised his wife with a then new 2005 Mustang GT. It was for her, so it seemed to go over OK.
While this policy has not been tested yet, Lindsay and I have agreed that we are pretty much just going to both hoard cars as space allows. We are more or less aware of each others' crapheap wish lists (as an aside, I am allowing for a transmission shed for the 3000GT she aspires to; I just assume trannies are a wear item in Mitsubishis, if her former Eclipse was any indication).
Me: "Hey there love, I have to fly to Rhode Island to pick up this old Volvo I just 'won' on eBay."
LovedOne: "It's your money."
yep, we're made for each other.
I've picked out all the daily drivers my wife has had since we got married, then brought her into the process for a final OK before inking the papers. When mama's not happy, NOBODY's happy.
I can't really say what sort of approval would be needed for a car I bring home for myself. I think the most expensive one so far has been a couple hundred bucks.
I also bought a LeMons car without my soon-to-be spousal input, but then again it was always intended to end up like this when I was done with it.
<img src="https://fbcdn-sphotos-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-ash4/403575_2709905200396_1639847359_2456532_695369511_n.jpg">
Shit…I could get a whole blog about the 88 E30 ragtop I bought for my then wife as a Valentine's gift….
Hey, I think I will…
Off Topic….my friend Kris down in Palm Beach decided on her new car…
WooHoo…another blog….
Happy New Years my fellow Hoons….
could you write a blog about the E30 being the perfect gift, or the not-so-perfect gift?
Given the Ex- part, it seems like it was the right car for the wrong woman.
sorry to hear that. i was just curious because the E30 is one of my favorite cars of all time. i'd rather have an E30 M3 than a wedding ring or any amount of jewelry.
i really feel for the men of our country that are victims of vehicular abuse. no man should have to clear every car purchase with his wife, unless it's the sole family car or she is the breadwinner. someone needs to start a nonprofit organization or have a telethon or something. so tragic.
i would love to hear something unfamiliar coming up the driveway, as long as i get to drive it too.
Depends on the wife. There's a couple mentioned in this thread who are pretty cool. Mine has signed off on at least one hooligan-mobile, and is at least humoring me on the idea of a kit car (SHE mentioned that she thought I'd have too much fun with a LeMons racer after we got a house…).
Another example, a buddy of mine owns an S2000 because when he and his wife went to test drive cars, they decided to test drive the S on a lark. After they drove the S, they just couldn't bring themselves to buy an Accord (and she was the one who told me this).
It's not that you need complete freedom, you just need buy-in, which can be, in its way, more satisfying.
We must be different. She has her car, I have my cars of the month, and the kid hauler was a both decision. As long as I keep it cheap and there's less than ten complaints a week from the town board, she's never had a problem. I've gone up to $2500. Come to think of it, she's taken over a few of 'em…
Wow, I think this is the most romantic thing I've ever said about me wife!
In theory I agree, but there are tactile issues to consider. As an example, I love the Wrangler, but a JK is an awkward fit for me. Because I have shorter legs, I need the seat close enough to the steering wheel that I end up bashing my knees off the dashboard. It should be an easy case of sending Chrysler $20k and have them send me the most basic Wrangler they can in return, but in reality, I don't know if I'd be able to live with it.
My fiancee hates the idea of the car buying process, so I suspect once it comes time for us to buy a car together, I'll be doing all the legwork to prep two or three candidates for her approval, and then complete the buying process. As it is, when she got her current car, I did most of the research (and found the listing for the car she bought), and her dad went along for the test drive. Not that she couldn't do it, but she knows we actually sort of enjoy doing it.
Of course, for project cars and toys, I know I'm free to do whatever I want, as long as it's not a financially ruinous action.
I really need to quit listening to my wife when I buy cars. She's the one that told me to get my Z3/M Roadster Conversion that has been a Lemon since the day I got it. She also told me to buy a new truck, now I have payments for the next 5+ years.
My father used to just go buy his car, my mother knew he was getting a car but not what type or which one. Then again my father was the bread winner and he needed his car for work (he was in sales) so my Mom knew it wasn't going to be something crazy. He did just show up at home twice with a new car after going to get the old one serviced, but they were leases and just new versions of the old one. (they were Sables, he went through about 7 of those dam things).
My wife owned a Fiat, a Nash, a Gremlin and a Datsun F10 wagon before we married. And she insisted that we buy this:
<img src="http://www.instablogsimages.com/images/2011/04/05/custom-cadillac-camper_rL44d_52.jpg" width="600">
So I can do whatever I want, within reason, as long as I don't sell her car out from under her.
A few thoughts from someone who sells cars for a living, and has done a few reviews/posts about them. The following comments are about new car or newish used car buying, not weekend toys / beaters / project cars:
* I don't think I've ever sold a car to someone who bought primarily on an internet review/road test done by a stranger. Sure, a review may have informed or guided them, but most people buy what they want/what they think they want/what I suggest.
* I meet a lot more women making car buying decisions than men. I think it's just the current marriage dynamic. Just yesterday, I helped a female customer with a huge rock on her finger shop for a new car. Not once did the other half get mentioned. I don't know if he even exists or is involved. Doesn't matter at this point. She is shopping for what she wants and is working on the financing part now.
* I hear a lot more, "I need to talk to my wife" than I hear, "I need to talk to my husband". Again, maybe how marriage is going nowadays.
* If the car is for the wife, most husbands will almost defer the decision to her. If the car is for the husband, the wife seems to have a lot of influence on the final decision. The power is clearly in the wife's corner. I see this almost daily.
* Based on the above, if a husband came home with a surprise car, said husband could receive a beating or stern reprimand if the wife was not significantly consulted. I can't recall selling a car to a guy who was going to surprise his wife with it. Frankly, I don't think most husbands have the balls or bravery to try that. Again, the modern marriage dynamic thing.
Just my view from the car retailing trenches. It's been a good month, will try to finish it strong today.
In my household, car purchases are still mostly my domain. My partner is tired of her Civic and has a standing request for me to pick out something to replace it. It's a standing request because there's currently nothing in the NA market that looks like it's worth a car payment. Of course, when I do finally offer a suggestion, she will have veto power.
For my own cars, she hardly constrains my choices at all. Right now, she says that I can't buy another car because (1) we don't have any more parking spaces, and (2) one of my cars has had a couple problems arise from not being driven enough. However, she's willing to set those issues aside if something awesome turns up (she was encouraging me to bid a local XR4Ti on eBay a few months ago). And I'm sure she would be OK with a surprise car if I got a ridiculously good deal on something awesome.
I surprised the then-girlfriend with my new-to-me car a couple years ago. she hated it but I absolutely loved it the entire length of my ownership. 94 isuzu trooper. awesome ride. lol but I guess it didn't actually work considering she hated it
I got pretty much full authority to pick and buy a car, as long as it meets the needs for our family. I do include my better half in the process, just because she pays more attention to important details when I'm just excited that I found the only manual turbo diesel station wagon in the country, and immediately forget my whole checklist of things I need to check….
Considering the fact that we're not financially independent, I find it very normal to discuss the spending of a large amount of money before spending it. If we were to be a lot wealthier I could definitely see me bringing that Audi Q7 3.0 TDI home as a surprise!
Catching up…
I was looking to replace the A4 with something AWD and more reliable. This sent me to the Subaru shop looking at the Legacy. I wanted a wagon, but the sedan was more realistic.
The shop called, said they had one on a truck. When I got there the salesman said that was an ordered car. So I bought the Impreza 2.5RS. Got it home, opened the garage door for the reveal for my wife* and she hated it, my guts, the moment I was brought into this world, and the foglights.
I loved it.
*ex-wife.
I think we had more discussion about what to buy my son than we have about the previous several auto purchases. For us, there was the general, "we need a new kid hauler", so off I went to find us a new mini-van. Then the, "I need a new car and I'm sick of minivans", so off I went to find myself something more fun. Then there was, "Son needs a car since his van is dead", so off I went to find something… but there were several months of discussion about it – how much to spend, something that works out of the box & will last many moons, or something cheap that will need repair so he can learn to work under the hood, or….
In all cases, we've discussed budget, then I've been on the web & out the door with minimal consultation. She doesn't want to deal with it, and trusts my judgement. In fact, I've had more complaints about a couple of the vehicles I've picked than she has. Of course, we're not buying new (just re-read the title…) but still.
On the other hand, several friends of mine have been known to buy birthday/Christmas gift-cars for their spouses in the brand-new Jag-Lexus-Mercedes price range and have brought them home to high levels of excitement. I think that if you're paying cash, and the car is less than a month's income, there's not much angst in the new-car purchase.