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Joe Schmo Wrecks a Lambo

Jo Schmo December 21, 2011 In General 48 Comments

Not me. Dammit

No, dammit you didn’t read that wrong.

Update: Now with MOAR carnage photos

Maverick Country Stores, a popular chain of convenience stores here in the west has been running a promotion, “Joe Schmo to Lambo” and a local Utah man won the lime green Lamborghini Murcielago Roadster LP640 over the weekend and promptly stuck in in a ditch.  And no, it wasn’t me.  Dammit.  I would give 3 of my redundant organs for a chance to wreck a Lamborghini Murcielago.  Dammit.  Also,  people actually win these contests?  Dammit.

Via ABC4

Updated photos VIA KSL

Photo Credit

  • Scandinavian Flick

    I didn't know pelicans were that common in Utah. Anyway, I think that's a Bugatti, dude.

    • It was a seagull!

      • buzzboy7

        Seagull is the state bird of UT

  • Maverik advertised this giveaway for at least two football seasons on the jumbotron at the Rice-Eccles Stadium. Several of us wondered if it was some sort of scam (along the lines of the "toy yoda" giveaway) – or if they would ever give it away at all. Now we've got a winner who crashes the car under let's say… unusual circumstances and he's posted on facebook soliciting help on how to sell it because "the stupid government" wants taxes paid on the prize. Seems mighty fishy.

    Save the Lambos! Oh, and don't blame the government for this one – blame Maverik for leaving you on the hook for the amount. If it was a real prize, they'd have paid that tax bill too. Instead, it's just a burden.

    • NO, there have been plenty of sweepstakes and raffle winners who've been unable to pay the taxes on their new prize. A number of years ago 60 Minutes profiled a little white-haired grandma who won a vintage Rolls-Royce on The Price Is Right and couldn't even sell it for what the tax bill was.

    • JayP2112

      I wonder how many people actually take the car in lieu of the cash award… not knowing Uncle Sam will take his share.

      I'ma gonna google to see if I can find the rest of the story… can't pay his taxes. Welcome to the club man…

      • fodder650

        When I won the motorcycle I didn't have an option for a cash reward. Considering my employment status I would have taken it. So let's say this guy is facing the same circumstances I did.

        First he has to pay the sales tax for his state. I don't know what it is for his state but for mine it's 6%. On a $200k car that's a pretty healthy chunk of change.
        Then he also has to get a 1099 income tax form for the 200k. Because, and yes this is odd, the company is giving him the money to buy their own product. Again I know this because I am waiting for my 1099G to arrive in a few weeks with the $23k on it.

        If they had offered me even 10k cash instead of "any bike we sell except for Ness models". I would have taken the $10,000. Truly I love my bike. I plan on running the wheels of it for the next decade. It's just that winning something like this comes with a cost. That and insuring it as well. I have it much easier insuring a bike. In his case I can only imagine what it would cost.

        Not that I am complaining. I got lucky with the Victory. He got lucky with the Lambo.

        • dragon951

          Yeah, I imagine the insurance for that car is likely more than his mortgage and property tax combined. Not to mention registration, gas and maintenance costs. You would only really want to win one if you could afford to buy one anyways. The golden rule of car buying (well, the one that I follow and have no idea where it came from) is: The purchase price is at best half the price of owning a car, and then only if you are lucky.

          • fodder650

            My guess is that either he planned on selling it somehow or he had no collision insurance on it. I don't think I read that it was totaled either

    • Mad_Hungarian

      Not sure that would work. Wouldn't the cash award to pay the taxes itself be more income to the winner, on which he would owe more tax, and so on?

      • You would think so but I have heard of contests where the prize includes the tax bill. I have no idea how that works but I know it's been done.

      • hwyengr

        It evens out after a couple of iterations.

        Edited to add:
        Assume a simple 10% tax:
        A $5,000 prize would cost you $500, so they pay that.
        The tax on the $500 would be $50, so they pay that.
        The tax on the $50 would be $5…
        Then $0.50…
        THen $.05…

        So if they paid you $5,555.55 you'd clear $5,000, which was the original prize.

  • Dude, Jo Schmo, you should check out and see if your identity was stoled.

    • Jo_Schmo

      I only have 6 offers from Nigerian Princes in my inbox today… that seems about normal.

      • Scandinavian Flick

        You get prince e-mails??? All I get are these stupid p3n15 pill offers…

        Pfft, like I need that…

        • pj134

          Yeah, I mean, you don't even have one!

          • Scandinavian Flick

            Yup, I'm a chick. You caught me. In fact, I'm the only girl on the entire internets.

            • pj134

              Teehee(You asked for it.)

              • Scandinavian Flick

                Almost literally.

                • pj134

                  Yeah, that was about the closest you could get without saying “I have a vagina”.

        • $kaycog

          I get those emails too, and I REALLY don't need them.

          I got a Nigerian Prince phone call several months ago. He said, in his particular accent, that I'd win $500K if I'd call a certain phone number. Then he called me 'darling' which really made my skin crawl. I didn't call the number, so no $500K for me.

          • Scandinavian Flick

            But think of all the Ford GT (intentionally left un-pluralized) you could have bought with that!

            • $kaycog

              I could have bought probably three of them. I only want one. I'd pocket the change.

          • Well some say, could be a just a rumor, that these Nigerian Princes are well gifted.

  • $kaycog

    I saw Joe Schmo and Utah, and my heart beat a little faster. I'm glad it's someone else, my dear.

    • i dunno, I kind of wish it was me. After I put the car in the ditch I would donate it to Hooniverse and write it off as a charitable donation. That would work right?

  • How desperate is he? Could be the biggest LeMons overdog ever.

    • You are a genius!!! Watch it get people's curse.
      Oh wait, it already did.

    • Van_Sarockin

      Somebody still has to pay the tax on it. So that would provide a VERY hefty credit to draw against in making improvements to the car so it can be distinctive and competitive with the LeMons field.

      • disguise it with a Fiero body kit!

      • fodder650

        Yeah that's the hard part isn't it. Most people aren't aware of the cost of a free win. Although a win is a win.

    • fodder650

      You would get 200,000 penalty laps. One for each dollar of the MSRP. Then it would be bought for $500 at the end of the race

      • You're right. I agree it's a great plan, too.

        • fodder650

          So if you pulled the engine and all wheel drive out of it plus the interior, wheels, tires, and bodywork. You might be able to get it down to $500. Then use Miata parts to replace what you pulled out

  • The guy said it wasn't driveable, and yet all I really see are a few bodywork scratches and a flat tire. If I had a dollar for everytime I've driven with a flat tire… I'd have several dollars! This one time I went 5 miles because it was snowing outside and cold. I'd have kept going but the racket was giving me a headache. I was hoping to avoid inflating my Gremlins pristine space saver… but then the rim started getting all weird so I stopped by a buddy's house and borrowed the spare off his '77 Toyota pickup. That was a cool truck.

    Wait, what were we talking about?

    • The sweet Bugatti that wrecked in Utah.

  • Gooseboy78

    in my country (New Zealand) when you win car all taxes are paid buy the time you win. my country that car is $400,000+ brand new. and they still may not allowit on to the roads as it may be too fast. we have a lot more corners and idiots and dodgy road works than the average american city.

  • Mad_Hungarian

    Hmmm. Another site which I will not name is insinuating the guy was trying to total the car on purpose so as to use the insurance money to pay the taxes. The pix on that site make the damage look a lot worse. What we see here can't possibly be a total on a car that expensive. I'm sure the tax burden is about $100K or more. So, all he needed to do was list the thing on eBay with a reserve $100K above what he owes the taxman, and voila, $100K instant free money. Someone would buy a $380K Lambo for 200K in the proverbial New York Minute — before he wrecked it, I mean.

    • Yep, we are aware of what you heard and where 😉 While nobody here has accused this gentleman of anything or assumed he is up to no good (he was a n00b in a supercar, what did you expect?) there are other entities out there that like to spin things their way. After everything I have read, I still don't believe there is anything nefarious going on here. Then again, it is in Utah county so anything is possible…

      • hwyengr

        You read The Consumerist, too?

        • Actually I get all my pertinent news from Jezebel

      • dragon951

        It looks like they delivered it in the stock Pzero Rosso tires (I doubt the company is going to spring for a winter set), and based on the snow on the ground I imagine they had traction on par with blocks of wood when he took the car out for a spin, so I would say it is almost inevitable that a crash was going to happen, even if he drove at legal speeds. Driving on max performance summer tires in the winter is already damn near impossible when you don't have 600hp.

        • oddly enough, we haven't had any snow yet this season, save for a few light dustings here and there (though we haven't had any perceptible accumulation on the roads.) It is entirely possible the road was slick as the inversion has caused a perpetual mist mixed with freezing temperatures.

          • dragon951

            I should clarify. I assumed he was only taking it out on a clean and dry road, but the presence of snow means it is still cold. The polymers they use in summer tires for grip usually have a much higher glass transition temperature (where the compound is no longer pliable, but brittle and slippery like glass) than pure rubber. As these are such extreme high performance versions, they probably turn into hard blocks even above freezing. This article is a pretty quick synopsis.

            • you make a good point, cold performance tires suck in any condition.

  • [youtube wJ6d_EE0Kao http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wJ6d_EE0Kao youtube]

  • dukeisduke

    Wow, what an ugly color.