Hooniverse Asks- What Would You Like to Remote Control on Your Car?
We’ve been able to remotely lock and unlock our cars for years. For cold environs, you can remote start your car from the privacy of your house while wearing your wife’s lingerie. And in Europe, where litigation threats are less onerous, you can even raise and lower your convertible top with just a press on your pocketed fob. But what else would you like to that magic keychain resident to do?
Life keeps getting easier and easier. It used to be you couldn’t get into your car without a twist of your key in the lock or a brick. Either option wasted valuable time and energy and left many car owners wanting for a better option. Arriving first on luxury cars, and trickling down to the rest of us the way they said Reaganomics should have worked, wireless remotes simplified that action to a simple thumb-press on a handy key fob button. Of course, eventually even that activity became physically onerous and new cars require only that you maintain the fob on your person in order for the door locks to actuate, and permitting you access.
Once electronics gained a foothold in the automotive world – about the same time they played a big roll in presidential politics – it became obvious that they’d eventually become our bitch. Now, motors move your seat into a multitude of permutations, adjust your mirrors, and move your pedals up to meet your freakishly short legs – all at our behest due to electronic controls.
It’s even too much these days to close a trunk or hatch, our wasted cargo capacity now being smartly used to house the electrics and hydraulics to do it for us. Thank god, I was getting winded there.
But even with all this automation, there’s still improvement to be had. I still have to physically climb into and out of my car, and don’t get me started on having to lift my soda can from cup holder to lips while the can is mostly full – that’s 12 freakin’ ounces! So what aspect of your car would you like to see automated? Would you like to have it start your bun warmers in the seats while you’re still in eating your Count Chocula? How about a mood setting on your fob that finds Eminem on the radio before you get in your car when you’re feeling mad urban, or Justin Beiber- you know, for the girls?
Image sources: [jproc.ca, car and driver]
Related posts:
- Hooniverse Asks- How Much Control Are You Willing to Give Up?
- Hooniverse Asks- What Makes a Supercar?
- Hooniverse Asks- What Non-Car Company Would You Most Like To See Build One?
- Hooniverse Asks- What’s The Oldest Car You’d Seriously Consider as a Daily Driver?
- Hooniverse Asks- What Was The Best Cartoon Car?
Just yesterday I thought about this question! Street parking sucks in the winter. I don't want to start my car's engine as I understand that idling it up to temperature causes more wear than (gently) driving. But the car's got a nice fresh battery… and seat heaters. Why can't I pre-heat my driver's seat?
I wish there was some sort of mechanism that would do my shifting for me.
Have you tried the Fleshlight?
Next you'll want some sort of auto function headlights and windshield wipers… get a job hippie!
I FOUND A MECHANISM ON THE KEYBOARD THAT DOES MY SHIFTING FOR ME AND IT WORKS GREAT ALL THE TIME!
You certainly sound excited.
YES, THANKS TO THIS DISCOVERY I'M FEELING JUST CAPITAL!
Machine guns.
It seems that every other time I fill up for gas, a different friendly-looking fellow comes up to tell me a story of how his car broke down a half mile away, and he called a wrecker but he's a few dollars short. He needs the car to be able to drive to the pharmacy to get his dying grandma's medicine and to get to work so that he can afford to feed his starving baby. He's very embarassed that he's had to resort to asking strangers for money but he doesn't know what else to do. Can I help him out with a few bucks?
I want remote fueling without having to stop the car.
<img src="http://aviationblog.dallasnews.com/f35%20refuel-thumb-400×314.jpg">
I once had one of those guys approach me that was convincing. He was well dressed, well spoken, and well…believable. I was about to reach for my wallet when it occurred to me that I might as well just fix his car.
I offered as much and asked him where his car was. He backpedaled faster than a scalded cat…
I drive a Fuel Tanker, so you can imagine all the stories I've heard in the parking lot of the Qwik-E-Mart while waiting for gravity to do its work.
The best was when a Native American guy came up to me in the middle of the night (the Qwik-E-Mart was closed and it's always kind of sketchy when people appear out of the darkness) and said, "Hey Bro'….. Can I borrow three dollars to get some film developed?"
I laughed so freaking hard I gave him a fiver for creativity.
Personally, I'm fine with just having remote lock, unlock, trunk pop and remote start. Anything more and you are just asking for trouble.
I'd settle for remote-start, to heck with the rest. Except for remote-start works for the bun-warmers too. Yes.
You definitely want to reduce the amount of time you are exposed in -40 weather. We had -37 (with windchill, mind) last week, and I gotta tell you – daaaamn.
And the months of January/February are way colder. *buys lottery ticket*
I'd like button on the dash that lowers a sound-proof (but not airtight) helmet over my 5-year-old son's head when I'm driving and he JUST WON'T SHUT UP!! I love the kid (thus, not airtight) but sometimes I just need him to stop talking.
Last night I wanted to figure out dinner which required a phone call. (My wife was driving so all was legal.) The problem was the 2-year old and 3-year old in the back seat. They were both in "no nap and I'm living life!" mode. Alternatively screaming, laughing, or growling like a dinosaur/Cinderella. A limo style partition would have been really nice.
Other cars.
In particular, the ones going x.2 MPH passing traffic going x.0 MPH in an x+5 MPH zone.
Even the power windows in my car annoy me, so no. But automatic cheeseburgers would be nice.
<img src="http://iruntheinternet.com/lulzdump/images/cow-toy-car-stuck-head-1259518194w.jpg" />
I can automatically haz?
<img src="http://icanhascheezburger.files.wordpress.com/2009/05/funny-pictures-cats-push-buttons.jpg" />
My car doesn't have keyless locking, and that's a bit of a nuisance. However, I've been hearing stories about people running around parking lots with code readers stealing stuff from parked cars. Tends to be especially big around malls during Christmas shopping season.
Living in Florida, I'd like remote start/lower all windows/turn on A/C full blast all in one button.
a Bitch-slap button for people in the car who say stupid things.
Not really automatic but hows this:-
You're driving along, listening to a talk show. They're discussing something relevant to your interest, you're hanging on their every word and then suddenly "WE GOT TRAFFIC SNARLING UP AT JUNCTION 28…" the local traffic news suddenly overrides and you totally lose track of what they were saying.
How about just a few beeps to warn you that some bloody annoying traffic broadcast is about to cut in, so you can choose whether to listen to it or not?
No? Just me then.
Ok.
Funny, they don't usually tell me about the traffic until I pull into the parking spot at work. Weird.
I would like to not automatically have to buy all the automatic crap just to get a sunroof and a decent stereo on a new car. Option packages annoy me.
Sort of like when DirecTV sells you the Lifetime Movie Channel and the Golf Channel and a buch of other crap, when all you really wanted was Speed and the History Channel.
Only with insurance rates.
Absolutely. Nothing worse than getting stuck with Lifetime and Food Channel just to get BBC Canada. And if they had something better than Speed, I don't need 15 freakin' hockey channels. If I want violence, I'll watch hurling, rugby or Figure-8 caravan racing.
In that order.
My sister's previous car had a rear-seat DVD player, so I was a bit surprised that her current car didn't have one. She said it would have cost an extra $3000 to get into the next-higher package which included it.
Around the same time, I got a factory-refurbed name-brand flipdown unit off eBay for less than $200. It took about an hour to install.
I really wanted to get traction control when we bought our Trailblazer in 2004. It was actually available as a stand alone option for $200 or so. Unfortunately I couldn't find a single model with traction control that didn't also include another $2000 or so in options. It was hard enough to find a model with cloth seats and a sunroof, both requirements for the wife since it is here daily driver. We were shopping the year model end closeouts with a GM family discount so a special order was out.
I'd probably be happy with a remote trunk release. Honda, in their infinite wisdom, equipped my model with remote locks, but I guess the extra dollar or so worth of pieces to open the trunk wasn't worth it. Then again, I also don't have one-touch down power windows, even on the driver's door. I suppose it's all to convince you to step up to the next model.
Express-up for all four windows might be nice. My car doesn't have a trunk release on the fob, either, which would be handy sometimes.
Express down for all windows plus sunroof. Would be really handy when I return to my car in summer and once again notice that the sun turns around my car and that shady tree I was parking under.
A remote spark-plug de-oiler would make cold starts after the CRX has been sitting for a while less… uneven. Or I could just break down and put new valve seals in.
The passengers.
Seats. It probably doesn't matter to most of you, but I share the one-and-only car in the family. I'd be great if it powered the seat back as I unlock the door…or just regular memory seats'll do it for me.