Audi R8 E-Tron

Remember that kid in your elementary class who lived on the edge of town and his cool dad let him drive the old governor-free electric golf cart? Today that cool dad is Audi, that golf cart is the Audi R8 E-tron, and that kid is me.

Banish the memory of the screamin’ red Audi E-Tron that stormed the auto show circuit in 2009. That car is pretty (and looks prettier with R8 V10 wheels) and exists as a drivable prototype, but today we’re talking about the R8 E-tron, a rolling test bed used to beat the snot out of Audi’s prototype electric powertrain. Behind the scenes Audi’s busily working away on a plan to put an electric R8 into production sometime in 2012. Within 20 years it’s planning hybridization or electrification to touch most if its lineup in some way. This is not the end of the world, just the beginning of a brave new one.

From the outside it may look like an R8 tarted-up with electric yellow whatsits and a new engine cover, but underneath it’s all techno-wizardry and electronic nerd stuff. Rather than a thumping V8 or Lamborghini-derived V10, this one packs not one, not two, but four asynchronous electric motors driving each of the wheels independently, together they weigh a sprightly 375 lbs and develop 442 lb-ft of torque with 308 HP. If not for that 53 kWh, 1100 lb lithium ion battery taking up the engine bay we’d be talking some serious get up and go, but alas these are the sacrifices necessary for a 155 mile range.

One or two very powerful motors might seem the ticket but with four independent motors you can make the car turn on a dime, literally. Imagine complete freedom to power any wheel at any time independent from the others. Torque vectoring, yaw control, stability control all take a giant leap forward. Add this bit of vocabulary to your memory banks and store it away: “Selective Acceleration.” Rather than braking an individual wheel to provide stability control, certain wheels can be accelerated to provide both a stable vehicle and even faster corners — tasty. Heck, if they wanted, engineers could scrub those big Pirellis down to nothing in a jiffy by turning the car around in place like a tank. Four motors takes “Quattro” to a whole new level. It’s still a long way between here and there, though.

Let’s go back to that golf cart reference from earlier. It’s pertinent because the R8 E-Tron isn’t nearly a finished car yet, it feels exactly like a sleeker, burlier version of the ubiquitous, white, squirrel-chasers. That’s fine, this is just a mule after all. Beneath the skin, mysterious whirs and clicks are present even standing still, the center console, having no need for crazy stuff like a parking brake, has been remolded. The center LCD screen displays vehicle system statuses and rather than a tach you get a “% Power” meter where doing your best to peg the top end is the hoon’s objective. The seats have been tossed for racing buckets. It’s purpose built, stripped down and techy with little mind paid to the fetishized and bloated ideal of what makes a supercar these days. It’s cool.

Close the door, buckle your seat belt, and whoo hoo! Ignition button. “Click”… nothing. Maybe the biggest let down of an electric supercar is the absence of the dramatic engine firing. It’s fine in any of the mundane human-moving hybrid appliances out there, not even missed, really, but on a supercar it kinda stings the soul a little bit. Turning a key or flipping a momentary switch used to unleash the wrath of hell, now it just turns on the power electronics and initializes software.

Lamenting the idiosyncrasies of the past is for future-fearing curmudgeons though. Mash the pedal and crush your spleen, you’ll get over the lack of an exhaust note. 0-62 mph comes in 4.8 seconds on the way to a top speed of 155 mph, riding a glorious wave of torque all the way. It’s like being kicked out of a plane with the sound of an RC car replacing the wind rushing by your face. Throwing the car into a corner delivers the familiar razor sharpness from the R8 4.2 — a precision instrument designed for trained professionals and delightfully harmful in the hands of the foolhardy. The steering is heavy, overly heavy, as if they’d forgotten to turn on the electronic power assist, but that just adds to the golf kart feel. It’s an R8 in the raw, only with a side of silence and electric motor whir.

But is it a supercar? It’s a little bit herky-jerky, the connection between pedal-to-the-metal and crushed spleen is occasionally delayed or delivered stepwise. The car shudders once in a while. You can hear the wheel bearings turning. There are no heated seats. There are squeaks in the cabin. There’s no suede headliner. The center console isn’t leather wrapped. The cupholders are too shallow. It doesn’t even have satellite radio.

Just kidding. It’s the funnest golf cart I’ve ever driven.  Between now and 2012 the drivetrain and power delivery software will be whittled to perfection, a new chassis will arrive designed with the electron-motivation in mind and battery tech will advance even further. When it’s finished, the production R8 E-tron will undoubtedly be the must-have stupid car on every wealthy golfers list. Even Elin Nordigren couldn’t chase this one down.

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