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Maximum Professional Car Weekend: Bring Out Your Dead, Let’s Talk About Hearses

Jim Brennan October 24, 2010 For Sale 10 Comments

Welcome to another posting on Maximum Professional Car Weekend, and this time, lets take a look at a few of the Hearses that are currently for sale throughout the net.

Lets start with this 1979 Cadillac Miller Meteor Hearse. According to the listing:

This hearse just came out of service last month. It is a two-owner, last owner was a small town funeral home in PA. It quite literally runs and drives like brand new. Starts up wonderfully, and cruises down the road flawlessly.

The 425ci V8 runs excellent. Very well maintained and cared for mechanically, I think you will be hard pressed to find a better driving one of this vintage. Has just 85k original miles on it, just passed PA inspection in July of this year. Cosmetically, they did do some touch-ups, but is original for the most part. They recently painted the top black, and have fixed some minor rust spots over the years. I have tried to show close-up spots of where there is some bubbling coming through. Overall, although it does have some rust, it is fairly solid for a 31 year old car from the northeast. Interior is in very nice shape, not perfect, but once again very nice for the year.

Basically, I would say that this is a nice affordable classic hearse that you can really enjoy. Great inexpensive way to get into the business or hobby. You can take it to car shows and be proud of it, although it is probably not going to be a class winner. I encourage anyone to come look at and drive the car for themselves before the auction ends if they would like to. You could fly or drive in from anywhere and drive this car home with complete confidence.

This Hearse is currently at $1,525, but the reserve hasn’t been met. See the listing here.

Our next Hearse is a 1972 Oldsmobile Ninety-Eight with just a little under 64,000 miles, and it is near mint shape. Acording to the listing:

Here we have a unique vehicle to say the least! This hearse began it’s life as a basic Olds 98 Custom Cruiser Station Wagon. It was cut and stretched and modified by the people at the
Cotner-Bevington factory into what you see today. In 1972 Cotner-Bevington made two wheelbases… this Olds is a heavily optioned long wheelbase version and is 22.4 feet long! A copy of the original factory brochure
is included with the vehicle. This hearse is totally original (except for the stainless exhaust) and still bears the name of the original owner on the plates in the rear windows.

The exterior is finished in Gun Metal Gray. The paint is original and in average condition… not to bad for being 36 years old! The body is straight but there is some minor rust (see the photos.) It would be a good candidate for a complete custom restoration… The interior is in great shape with no rips or tears. Everything is original including the casket hold downs. Under the hood is a Big-Block 455 cubic inch Olds engine and a Turbo 400 automatic transmission. The drive train is tight with no leaks. This Olds rides and drives like a dream!

And the price for this low mileage hearse? $9,888! See the listing here.

Just in time for Halloween, this 1958 Cadillac Hearse looks like it came from a casting call for the latest Horror Movie. This style is just about perfect with its tail fins, dagmar bumpers, and an engine transplant. According to the listing:

Hard to find 58 Cadillac Hearse, original engine is long gone was cracked and ruined, now has a 500 cubic inch motor, runs and drives good. I bought the engine from a person who was going to put it in a street rod, All I know about the engine is that it has had a bigger cam put in it (MTS cam #10 With valve spring swap and produces 550ftlbs torque). Has a automatic TH400 3spd tranny and original rear end. Brakes work, newly rebuilt master cylinder, good tires, I used it for parades and installed electric fans on radiator.

Light bar works, has purple lights under car and in front grill. Body is straight and someone has taken the trim off and apparently was working on fixing it up, inside interior panels removed, but I have the panels and I believe most if not all the trim.

Some of the pictures show it before I added the Chrome side pipes, I drove it last week in a parade and around town for several hours without any problems, but not sure I would take it for a long interstate cruise, it is very old. Not many of the old gauges work and speedometer doesnt work. I never hooked the windshield wipers or heat up so do not know their condition. most of the lights inside work. Front and rear glass is good, the front side door windows have cracks or spider patterns (same as a standard 58 Caddy), didn’t replace them since it added to the eerie look of it. Could use a paint job, it is black now but has some light overspray on it from who knows what, I am not sure if it’s a semi gloss primer or what its painted with but doesn’t look bad.

Bidding has stalled at $2,950.00, with the reserve unmet. See the listing here.

The next listing reads as if the car is trying to sell itself, and is rather amusing. Its a 1979 Cadillac that has been somewhat modified, but why not just sit back and read the passage:

I was born a limousine in 1979 and converted to a hearse by Hess & Eisenhard in Cincinnati, OH. I worked for a funeral home in NYS for 20 years and drove 81K miles. I was retired, parked and forgotten until 2006. I was discovered and saved by a witch, (yes a real one). She fixed my brakes and lines, carburetor, and anything else that needed doing using OEM GM parts. She gave me 20″ wheels with low profile tires, flame graphics, LED lit tailpipe, interior black lites and over 1K of sound system. She only drove me 3K miles over 4 years before she was unable to handle my 7L motor and 20′ length.

My current owner has given me a new battery and starter motor, my old ones worked but were tired. My motor has Mobil 1 and my joints are greased. I am loved by my owner but hated by his wife, so in order to maintain matrimonial harmony I have to find a new home. Can you give it to me? My interior is original including my curtains. I am currently registered in Massachussetts with antique plates. Drive me home and change my oil in 5K miles. My owner just wants me to find a good home and recover part of his investment.

The Buy-it-Now price for this monster is $4,200! See the listing here.

The final two Hearses that I am showing here comes from a company called Specialty Hearse & Ambulance Sales Corp. These two cars are low mileage, somewhat desirable, and quite affordable. This 1991 Cadillac Miller Meteor Three Way Funeral Coach (I guess it is big enough for a “Three-Way”) sports only 34,000 miles, comes equipped with a 5.7l LT1 (at least according to the listing), with the extra added attraction of Suicide Doors!

The asking price is $9,900! See the listing here.

Then there is this 1996 Cadillac Superior Supreme Funeral Coach, with the 5.7l LT1, every amenity one could want, but with an incredible 217,505 miles showing on the odometer. However, the asking price is even lower at $6,500!. See the listing here.

  • Whaaat no Buicks? Or any non-GM offerings for that matter, although Cadillac was pretty much the preferred brand by the industry.

    My fave is either the Olds or the '58, but the goofy purple funeral light has got to go

    • tonyola

      The reason that Cadillac was preferred was that for many years Cadillac offered a commercial chassis that was even longer than the limo chassis. None of the other makers were making them. There were a few aftermarket converters for non-Caddy GM cars, and there were also very small numbers of Ford and Mopar hearses. Henney made a fair number of Packard professional cars. But Cadillac had the postwar market pretty well sown up.

  • AteUpWithMotor

    I'm sorry, the correct answer to this question is:

    <img src="http://farm5.static.flickr.com/4066/4720268520_be61db33af.jpg&quot; width="500" height="353" alt="1972 Cadillac Monster Hearse front 3q" />

  • chrystlubitshi

    while AUWM may have a pretty sweet final ride posted above me… here's one i see at least once a week on my afternoon commute home

    <img src="http://i1210.photobucket.com/albums/cc420/jllynn42/Photo_042810_004.jpg&quot; width="500" border="0" alt="Photobucket">

    91-93 Caprice the common man's hearse

  • As a kid, I used to live in Taylorsville, Utah, which was also known as Granger (my last name). It's now the despised SLC suburb of West Valley City. Granger Motors was a defunct used car lot there on Redwood Road, and was populated with all manner of classic cars. Now, this was in the seventies, before old cars were hip. In those days, anything with fins was most definitely uncool. To everybody but me. Now, on that lot was a dark bronze '59 Cadillac hearse that I freakin' worshipped. I was in ninth grade, and I wanted that car in the worst way. Two spaces away from it was a '56 Cadillac ambulance, lights, sirens, spotlights, the whole nine yards. Gawd, those were nice cars. I hate to say it, but that whole lot of gorgeous, classic cars probably got recycled into razor blades during the Carter administration. Helluva note.

  • citroen67

    I absolutely love hearses. I would love to own a '67 Miller-Meteor. I just can't seem to find one that is both a decent price and not rotten to the core. You would be surprised at how many people think that a completely rusted, late sixties dead-sled is worth its weight in gold.

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