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Japanese Combine Molester Vans and Racing to Create Something New!

Deartháir February 24, 2010 In General 92 Comments

Oh those wacky Japanese...

Count on the Japanese to come up with this one. Uber-tipster bzr pointed us towards a new trend in Japan; it’s referred to as “Dajiban”, which is really just a Japanese-ification of “Dodge Van”. Dead serious, that’s what it is. I might have had a little chuckle at the cleverness of that one.

The bondo-and-primer paint finish will cost you extra.

According to some of the advertisements and delightfully-Engrish literature, these vans represent the epitome of “The American Lifestyle” to the outsider Japanese viewpoint. Apparently the typical American spends his day driving around trying to convince little girls to accept free candy or pet his free kitten. Except in Japan, he does it very quickly! Probably still without any pants.

There is so much wrong, and so much right, with this whole concept, I just can’t even try and wrap my head around it. So have a browse through the photos, dear reader, and see if you think this whole “American Lifestyle” trend could possibly catch on over in America. Count on the Japanese to show us how to do American with style.

I’ve captured all the photos I could find and re-hosted them here to avoid you the mental trauma of having to wade through VWVortex. It seems to have declined from its former glory as one of the best automotive forums on the internet. Feel free to trek over there to take a look, but I take no responsibility if some 80-lb 14-year-old questions your sexual orientation if you like something that he does not.

[Special thanks to SixSylinder for stopping by to provide us with the original sources for all this madness; it’s possible someone beat him to the punch as well, but since my source copy-n-pasted from him, we’ll happily give him the nod as the original madman to document this for us! See his original articles HERE and HERE. Thanks again!]

  • superbadd75

    Okay, some of these are pretty bad ass looking vans, but racing them is just so not right. Even slammed, they've got a center of gravity on par with a Red Oak, and they're heavy and cumbersome to drive at best. The up side is that if the A-Team needs a new van, one of these will do nicely.

    • http://intensedebate.com/people/Maymar Maymar

      Hey, BA proved you can hoon a van at least hard enough to outrun a military police Aspen/Volare. It's difficult, I know.

    • http://intensedebate.com/people/Tanshanomi Tanshanomi

      Perhaps I can interest you in the Lowest. CG. Van. Ever.
      <img src="http://blog.hemmings.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/06/laser49er_resized.jpg"&gt;

    • http://intensedebate.com/people/Sparky_Pete Sparky_Pete

      I've been campaigning to have Lemons or Chumpcar let me take Brownie (The World's Greatest Crappy Old RV) out on the track on parade laps or as a pacecar. I want to see which is quicker, an old Dodge motorhome or a microwave burrito.

    • gunslinger

      so untrue, my last van was set up just like these are, i built it in the late 90's. with the right suspension work, a hot rodded small block, & a flat black paint job, it was a terror on the streets of virginia beach, va. for a couple years. it handled better than my race cars, & proved to a lot of suprised folks that you could go fast, handle well, and carry all the comforts of home. all in one low key, inexpensive, crazy assed ride. if interested hit me up, gunslinger 4545@hotmail.com. & i'll share some of my secrets. peace.

      • RWB

        What kind of race cars exactly did you have?

    • stefano

      hey i have a dodge ram van 250 and i would like to know what kind of work to make it lower like this

    • jerry

      I have a lifted b3500 van. Swings pretty good cause of the long wheel base. Those that can't race should not attempt!

  • http://intensedebate.com/people/RedBaron89 RedBaron89

    Racing RamVans? Really? Dont get me wrong its A-team-tastic, but why would the japanese be racing a full size van… they must be running out of hope for the japanese big 3. On a side note, a buddy of mine did a 12v cummins swap into a RamVan in highschool. Nothing better than a big white van kicking out a thick, black plume of smoke while doing a burnout!

  • http://intensedebate.com/people/Maymar Maymar

    I love how I never would have considered this, and yet it seems so natural. Minilites look right on damn near anything.

    Also, a friend of mine just showed me this, and it seems exceptionally relevant.

  • http://intensedebate.com/people/Tanshanomi Tanshanomi

    Van hoonage: they're doing it wrong.
    <img src="http://www.tanshanomi.com/temp/FH000005_sm.jpg"&gt;

    • http://intensedebate.com/people/JeepyJayhawk JeepyJayhawk

      There's a lot of right things happening in that photo…

    • http://intensedebate.com/people/engineerd engineerd

      It seems they added lightness.

      • http://intensedebate.com/people/JeepyJayhawk JeepyJayhawk

        easier to tune the engine also…

  • http://intensedebate.com/people/P161911 P161911

    No E-150s or Savannahs? Only Dodges, is it a spec series?

    • http://intensedebate.com/people/Mad_Science Mad_Science

      SUPER DORIFTO SPEC D!!!

      • http://intensedebate.com/people/_Tomsk_ Tomsk

        I seriously can't wait for Best Motoring or whomever to capture this phenomenon on video.

        Off to look at Ram Vans on the Bay of e and the list of Craig.

  • http://intensedebate.com/people/JeepyJayhawk JeepyJayhawk

    I was actually thinking about picking up a van for utility purposes, this doesn't help my irrational interest any more.

  • http://www.hooniverse.com LTDScott

    I read about this last month. I actually really dig this trend.

    • http://intensedebate.com/people/Mad_Science Mad_Science

      Alas, no fox-body vans.
      (right?)

      • http://intensedebate.com/people/Maymar Maymar

        No Fox-body vans, but since a 302 drops in a Ranger, theoretically it could work on an Aerostar. Better yet, subvert the occasional SBC Astro/Safari with a SyTy drivetrain.

        • http://intensedebate.com/people/Mad_Science Mad_Science

          Dammit man, I've got enough project car ideas to last a lifetime…

        • http://intensedebate.com/people/engineerd engineerd

          You're evil. I like the way you think.

        • http://intensedebate.com/people/_Tomsk_ Tomsk

          The AWD system is the same…and the engine is the same aside from the turbo and associated hardware…

          SOLD!

    • Brandon

      Just graduated high school. So many of the kids make fun of these vans but they are cheap, easy to work with, and practical. Plus its always a hoot to see the looks on their face when my buddy blows their doors off with his 1998 Chevy 2500 work van

  • http://intensedebate.com/people/tenbeers tenbeers

    I just spent 45 minutes looking at Dodge vans on Craigslist.

    • http://intensedebate.com/people/Dearthair Deartháir

      Bet you never thought that would happen. Was it the "Free Kittens" tag?

      • http://intensedebate.com/people/tenbeers tenbeers

        Actually it was "Abreast", but kittens are awesome too.

    • http://intensedebate.com/people/Number_Six Number_Six

      You need to get a shortie with the rare and coveted 318 + 4sp man tran. As god is my witness, you can't have more fun in a van clothed.

  • PFG

    Needs more "Transcon Medivac."

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  • http://intensedebate.com/people/FuzzyPlushroom FuzzyPlushroom

    I'm picturing the one-ton extended-length Bondo-repaired two-tone-grey-with-maroon-pinstriping '94 Ram Van, in all its '70s glory (old-school dashboard, man)… lowered on Minilites.

    It's actually pretty amazing.

  • http://intensedebate.com/people/Mad_Science Mad_Science

    Seems apropos:
    http://www.theonion.com/content/news/nations_stra

    "In fact, Osterhaus said, a recent survey conducted by the organization found that almost 99 percent of all strangers are not actually the "bad men" they are so often portrayed to be, and most really do have the latest video games and comic books waiting back in their awesome basements, where there aren't any boring rules and everyone can just have fun."

  • http://intensedebate.com/people/BrianTheHoon BrianTheHoon

    This.Is.Awesome!

    And it totally makes up their disturbing "puke porn" fetish.

    • http://intensedebate.com/people/Number_Six Number_Six

      But not the one where they fry eggs that have been sho…never mind…

  • http://intensedebate.com/people/Alff Alff

    The King of Molester Van Drifting is some guy they call Freak Andy.

  • http://intensedebate.com/people/Thrashy Thrashy

    I've always thought there was some kind of crazy cultural feedback loop going on between Japan and America, and this proves it. We make Disney cartoons and send it over there, and then they riff off that and send back Studio Ghibli anime. They send their tiny cars over here, and we riff off them and create the ricer aesthetic, which then gets exported back, and now they're riffing on *that* with our work vans.

    So, the question is, what's the next step? Bosozoku'd-out Mistubishi Fuso drag racing?

    • http://intensedebate.com/people/FuzzyPlushroom FuzzyPlushroom

      They buy T-shirts with random English writing on them… our sorority girls get tattoos of Asian characters they can't read… I think there's something to your theory.

    • http://intensedebate.com/people/Alff Alff

      I had a buddy many years ago whose DD was a Fuso that he'd cut three feet out of the middle of and converted to a flatbed. He used it to transport his Jeeps and to tow the day sailer that he'd converted to a mini tugboat, complete with Isuzu P'up diesel power. That pretty much completes the American insanity portion of the feedback loop. I'd be real curious to see where the Japanese would take that sort of innovation.

    • http://intensedebate.com/people/_Tomsk_ Tomsk

      It's widely believed that the styling of the original Toyota bB/Scion xB was a tribute to the Astro/Safari.
      <img src="http://www.cars-directory.net/pictures/toyota/bb/pic_toyota_bb_8862.jpg&quot; width="457" height="343" />
      <img src="http://www.automedia.com/NewCarBuyersGuide/photos/2005/GMC/Safari%20Passenger/Minivan_Van/2005_GMC_Safari_ext_1.jpg&quot; width="433" height="280" />

  • http://intensedebate.com/people/TheOnlyCannoli TheOnlyCannoli

    This is wild. Thanks for bringing it to us.

  • http://intensedebate.com/people/omg_grip omg_grip

    I was working on getting my chevy like this almost 10 years ago. Go figure at the time everyone i knew thought the idea was ricerrific. And now its jdm tyte and cool.The only thing I hadnt done was paint the hood black. I had picked up a set of fiberglass runningboards with flares that I never got around to installing either.

    <a target='_blank' title='ImageShack – Image And Video Hosting' href='http://img3.imageshack.us/i/pandachevy.jpg/'><img src='http://img3.imageshack.us/img3/1372/pandachevy.jpg&#039; border='0'/>

  • http://intensedebate.com/people/FuzzyPlushroom FuzzyPlushroom

    I think the Tahoe "Safety Car" is even more out of its element.

  • Texan_Idiot25

    I'd be pretty concerned with some of those coil over mounts…

    But I dig the look on a few.

  • http://intensedebate.com/people/engineerd engineerd

    Hehehe…you said "breast".

    This is baffling. I like my pedo-van as much as the next guy, but I never really considered them as a platform for race hoonage. Although, the more I think about it, the more it makes sense. They are mid-engined, and even though they are tall the cg is still fairly low. Sure, you're not going to outhandle a Miata, but slam it to the ground and you might be able to turn some decent laps.

    Or, just put in a big ass engine to escape the angry neighbors when they see you trying to pick up that buxom 17 year old.

  • http://intensedebate.com/people/dragon951 dragon951

    That poster blew my mind. I might just start using their slogan as a comeback to swell-headed Prius drivers. Only it will be pronounced "ECO Suckura!! No Hentai Dodga van, no rife."

    The whole Hentai thing brings to mind a question though. Are they still pedophiles if they desire cartoon preteens?

  • http://intensedebate.com/people/lilwillie lilwillie

    I'm in. Time to look for a Van.

  • http://intensedebate.com/people/_Tomsk_ Tomsk

    <img src="http://knowyourmeme.com/system/icons/5/original/pedobear.jpg&quot; width="400" height="648" />
    This is one customizing trend I can really get behind. Heh, "get behind…"

    • http://intensedebate.com/people/P161911 P161911

      The Vancouver Olympics Mascot!
      http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/newstopics/howabo

      • http://intensedebate.com/people/Number_Six Number_Six

        Why is Vancouver using the tanooki? And where are its balls?

  • http://www.facebook.com/home.php?ref=home#/pages/Tombstone-AZ/Goodenough-Mine-TourTCMC/205373899689 CptSevere

    Too bad about this. Vans will be the douchebag craze about twenty minutes from now. We all think they're pretty awesome at this point, but I remember how stupid custom vans really were in the seventies. Remember, no more muscle cars, big 1973 bumpers, Vegas, Pintos, catalytic converters, Brougham editions and disco. CB radios. Those were the days of custom vans. They were the douchebag ride back then, no denying it. Shag carpet on the walls, floors and ceiling, captain's chairs, custom glass windows etched with a titted female figure and miles of pinstriping were really lame back then, and will be just as lame now when it's cool all over again. The seventies really sucked. I was a teenager then, and hated every minute of that poser decade.

    • http://intensedebate.com/people/coupeZ600 coupeZ600

      All that bad was necessary for us to have Punk Rock, and I think the Seventies were worth every minute.

      • http://intensedebate.com/people/CptSevere CptSevere

        No Future. Actually, putting it in that perspective, you're right, I'll give you that much. The eighties gave us some pretty obnoxious music to slam around and froth at the mouth to as well.

  • M44Power

    They should have had these on Initial-D.

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  • http://intensedebate.com/people/Novaload Novaload

    The USA. Our trash is another culture's treasure.

  • http://intensedebate.com/people/widgetsltd widgetsltd

    Where are they getting these vans? In Japan? Maybe they are ex-US military vehices. Or – worse yet – people are actually buying them in the US and importing them just for this purpose…

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  • http://sixsylinder.blogspot.com/ SixSylinder

    Here's my original blog post about this way back in July:

    http://sixsylinder.blogspot.com/2009/07/loosen-up

    And here's my Honda-Tech thread that was copied verbatim by the user on VWVortex:

    http://www.honda-tech.com/showthread.php?t=270554

    I'm trying to get more content from the Youga Base crew at present.

    • http://intensedebate.com/people/Dearthair Deartháir

      Thanks for that! The Vortex post wasn't exactly concerned with crediting their sources, so I had to run with that as my source. I'll update the post to give you proper credit! Cheers, and thanks for being so classy about it, rather than just ripping me a new one! It's so nice to see nowadays!

  • Guest

    That's kinda bad ass looking………………………………………………………………..

  • flatfive

    If anybody finds out about suspension setup on these things (or any easy ways to slam a Dodge van like this), please let the cat out of the bag. I will do this, guaranteed.

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  • USA-VAN-R

    well they say.. there is an ass for every seat… just gotta find a big enough ass
    there is a special interest for everyone whether it be collecting stamps , racing "vehicles" or customizing them
    vans are COOL… and thats all i got to say bout that
    Van oN !

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  • Guest

    Showed these pics to my old man, and he got to thinking…..

    If you could get your hands on a dry sump engine, that would allow for the engine to be lowered and set back some, then if you can move the suspension systems forward a little on both ends with the mods they've already done would make it handle pretty damn good.

    The whole time he's saying the above, I'm thinking of the '87 G-Van we just scrapped, setting in the weeds with a ZR1 engine under the dog house…………………………

  • http://intensedebate.com/people/Dearthair Deartháir

    Congratulations! You're the first person I've had to delete a post from for being an asshat. If you'd like to comment here in the future, tone down the 12-year-old name-calling. I won't block you, as I'm a firm believer in second chances, but that's not the sort of discourse that we allow on Hooniverse. Be civil, even when you disagree.

  • http://intensedebate.com/people/joshuman joshuman

    If you don't like it, go elsewhere. The name calling isn't something we do here.

  • http://intensedebate.com/people/Dearthair Deartháir

    Thanks to whoever reported this asshat, his IP address is logged, and further attempts to comment from near him geographically will be watched. I'm working on calling in a nuclear strike.

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  • http://www.supersmartcars.com Smith

    It's look amazing big van. I like this chevy van after seen this i also decide to buy one van.
    http://www.vans-minivansforsale.com/vans-minivans… here i found one van for me

  • alex3

    Thanks for bringing it to us.

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  • slantsixgoon
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  • Stelios

    I feel I need to post this.

    [youtube _ZnljTd6Qlg http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_ZnljTd6Qlg youtube]

  • Brandon

    Just graduated high school. So many of the kids make fun of these vans but they are cheap easy to work with and practical. Plus its always a hoot to see the looks on their face when my buddy blows their doors off with his 1998 Chevy 2500 work van

  • david

    Please let me know where you got the wheels for any of the slammed vans featured in this article.
    David

    • jerry

      David, have you found any info on lowering and wheel specs on these vehicles?

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