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Japanese Combine Molester Vans and Racing to Create Something New!

Deartháir February 24, 2010 In General

Oh those wacky Japanese...

Count on the Japanese to come up with this one. Uber-tipster bzr pointed us towards a new trend in Japan; it’s referred to as “Dajiban”, which is really just a Japanese-ification of “Dodge Van”. Dead serious, that’s what it is. I might have had a little chuckle at the cleverness of that one.

The bondo-and-primer paint finish will cost you extra.

According to some of the advertisements and delightfully-Engrish literature, these vans represent the epitome of “The American Lifestyle” to the outsider Japanese viewpoint. Apparently the typical American spends his day driving around trying to convince little girls to accept free candy or pet his free kitten. Except in Japan, he does it very quickly! Probably still without any pants.

There is so much wrong, and so much right, with this whole concept, I just can’t even try and wrap my head around it. So have a browse through the photos, dear reader, and see if you think this whole “American Lifestyle” trend could possibly catch on over in America. Count on the Japanese to show us how to do American with style.

I’ve captured all the photos I could find and re-hosted them here to avoid you the mental trauma of having to wade through VWVortex. It seems to have declined from its former glory as one of the best automotive forums on the internet. Feel free to trek over there to take a look, but I take no responsibility if some 80-lb 14-year-old questions your sexual orientation if you like something that he does not.

[Special thanks to SixSylinder for stopping by to provide us with the original sources for all this madness; it’s possible someone beat him to the punch as well, but since my source copy-n-pasted from him, we’ll happily give him the nod as the original madman to document this for us! See his original articles HERE and HERE. Thanks again!]

Currently there are "92 comments" on this Article:

  1. superbadd75 says:

    Okay, some of these are pretty bad ass looking vans, but racing them is just so not right. Even slammed, they've got a center of gravity on par with a Red Oak, and they're heavy and cumbersome to drive at best. The up side is that if the A-Team needs a new van, one of these will do nicely.

  2. RedBaron89 says:

    Racing RamVans? Really? Dont get me wrong its A-team-tastic, but why would the japanese be racing a full size van… they must be running out of hope for the japanese big 3. On a side note, a buddy of mine did a 12v cummins swap into a RamVan in highschool. Nothing better than a big white van kicking out a thick, black plume of smoke while doing a burnout!

  3. Maymar says:

    I love how I never would have considered this, and yet it seems so natural. Minilites look right on damn near anything.

    Also, a friend of mine just showed me this, and it seems exceptionally relevant.

  4. P161911 says:

    No E-150s or Savannahs? Only Dodges, is it a spec series?

  5. JeepyJayhawk says:

    I was actually thinking about picking up a van for utility purposes, this doesn't help my irrational interest any more.

  6. LTDScott says:

    I read about this last month. I actually really dig this trend.

  7. tenbeers says:

    I just spent 45 minutes looking at Dodge vans on Craigslist.

  8. PFG says:

    Needs more "Transcon Medivac."

  9. […] View original post here:  Japanese Combine Molester Vans and Racing to Create Something New … […]

  10. I'm picturing the one-ton extended-length Bondo-repaired two-tone-grey-with-maroon-pinstriping '94 Ram Van, in all its '70s glory (old-school dashboard, man)… lowered on Minilites.

    It's actually pretty amazing.

  11. Mad_Science says:

    Seems apropos:
    http://www.theonion.com/content/news/nations_stra

    "In fact, Osterhaus said, a recent survey conducted by the organization found that almost 99 percent of all strangers are not actually the "bad men" they are so often portrayed to be, and most really do have the latest video games and comic books waiting back in their awesome basements, where there aren't any boring rules and everyone can just have fun."

  12. BrianTheHoon says:

    This.Is.Awesome!

    And it totally makes up their disturbing "puke porn" fetish.

  13. Alff says:

    The King of Molester Van Drifting is some guy they call Freak Andy.

  14. Thrashy says:

    I've always thought there was some kind of crazy cultural feedback loop going on between Japan and America, and this proves it. We make Disney cartoons and send it over there, and then they riff off that and send back Studio Ghibli anime. They send their tiny cars over here, and we riff off them and create the ricer aesthetic, which then gets exported back, and now they're riffing on *that* with our work vans.

    So, the question is, what's the next step? Bosozoku'd-out Mistubishi Fuso drag racing?

  15. This is wild. Thanks for bringing it to us.

  16. omg_grip says:

    I was working on getting my chevy like this almost 10 years ago. Go figure at the time everyone i knew thought the idea was ricerrific. And now its jdm tyte and cool.The only thing I hadnt done was paint the hood black. I had picked up a set of fiberglass runningboards with flares that I never got around to installing either.

    <a target='_blank' title='ImageShack – Image And Video Hosting' href='http://img3.imageshack.us/i/pandachevy.jpg/'><img src='http://img3.imageshack.us/img3/1372/pandachevy.jpg&#039; border='0'/>

  17. I think the Tahoe "Safety Car" is even more out of its element.

  18. Texan_Idiot25 says:

    I'd be pretty concerned with some of those coil over mounts…

    But I dig the look on a few.

  19. engineerd says:

    Hehehe…you said "breast".

    This is baffling. I like my pedo-van as much as the next guy, but I never really considered them as a platform for race hoonage. Although, the more I think about it, the more it makes sense. They are mid-engined, and even though they are tall the cg is still fairly low. Sure, you're not going to outhandle a Miata, but slam it to the ground and you might be able to turn some decent laps.

    Or, just put in a big ass engine to escape the angry neighbors when they see you trying to pick up that buxom 17 year old.

  20. dragon951 says:

    That poster blew my mind. I might just start using their slogan as a comeback to swell-headed Prius drivers. Only it will be pronounced "ECO Suckura!! No Hentai Dodga van, no rife."

    The whole Hentai thing brings to mind a question though. Are they still pedophiles if they desire cartoon preteens?

  21. lilwillie says:

    I'm in. Time to look for a Van.

  22. Tomsk says:

    <img src="http://knowyourmeme.com/system/icons/5/original/pedobear.jpg&quot; width="400" height="648" />
    This is one customizing trend I can really get behind. Heh, "get behind…"

  23. CptSevere says:

    Too bad about this. Vans will be the douchebag craze about twenty minutes from now. We all think they're pretty awesome at this point, but I remember how stupid custom vans really were in the seventies. Remember, no more muscle cars, big 1973 bumpers, Vegas, Pintos, catalytic converters, Brougham editions and disco. CB radios. Those were the days of custom vans. They were the douchebag ride back then, no denying it. Shag carpet on the walls, floors and ceiling, captain's chairs, custom glass windows etched with a titted female figure and miles of pinstriping were really lame back then, and will be just as lame now when it's cool all over again. The seventies really sucked. I was a teenager then, and hated every minute of that poser decade.

    • coupeZ600 says:

      All that bad was necessary for us to have Punk Rock, and I think the Seventies were worth every minute.

      • CptSevere says:

        No Future. Actually, putting it in that perspective, you're right, I'll give you that much. The eighties gave us some pretty obnoxious music to slam around and froth at the mouth to as well.

  24. M44Power says:

    They should have had these on Initial-D.

  25. […] Původní článek najdete na Hooniverse.com […]

  26. […] As the freaks over at Hooniverse hit spinous out, plenty! Deartháir has finished the hornlike impact of distilling the beatific clog discover of a clump of a rattling long VW Vortex thread, so we crapper every savor the illusion of Dajiban. Now if exclusive Honda and Toyota would lease whatever of these dudes to restyle their underway lineup… [VW Vortex, via Hooniverse] […]

  27. Novaload says:

    The USA. Our trash is another culture's treasure.

  28. widgetsltd says:

    Where are they getting these vans? In Japan? Maybe they are ex-US military vehices. Or – worse yet – people are actually buying them in the US and importing them just for this purpose…

  29. Social comments and analytics for this post…

    This post was mentioned on Twitter by GeeHalen: RT @TheHooniverse: From Hooniverse: Japanese Combine Molester Vans and Racing to Create Something New! http://bit.ly/c3PoSf

  30. […] As the freaks over at Hooniverse hit spinous out, plenty! Deartháir has finished the hornlike impact of distilling the beatific clog discover of a clump of a rattling long VW Vortex thread, so we crapper every savor the illusion of Dajiban. Now if exclusive Honda and Toyota would lease whatever of these dudes to restyle their underway lineup… [VW Vortex, via Hooniverse] […]

  31. […] As the freaks over at Hooniverse have pointed out, plenty! Deartháir has done the hard work of distilling the good stuff out of a bunch of a very lengthy VW Vortex thread, so we can all enjoy the magic of Dajiban. Now if only Honda and Toyota would hire some of these dudes to restyle their current lineup… [VW Vortex, via Hooniverse] […]

  32. […] im not going to lie… i want one. Japanese Combine Molester Vans and Racing to Create Something New! : Hooniverse […]

  33. […] As the freaks over at Hooniverse hit spinous out, plenty! Deartháir has finished the hornlike impact of distilling the beatific clog discover of a clump of a rattling long VW Vortex thread, so we crapper every savor the illusion of Dajiban. Now if exclusive Honda and Toyota would lease whatever of these dudes to restyle their underway lineup… [VW Vortex, via Hooniverse] […]

  34. SixSylinder says:

    Here's my original blog post about this way back in July:

    http://sixsylinder.blogspot.com/2009/07/loosen-up

    And here's my Honda-Tech thread that was copied verbatim by the user on VWVortex:

    http://www.honda-tech.com/showthread.php?t=270554

    I'm trying to get more content from the Youga Base crew at present.

    • Deartháir says:

      Thanks for that! The Vortex post wasn't exactly concerned with crediting their sources, so I had to run with that as my source. I'll update the post to give you proper credit! Cheers, and thanks for being so classy about it, rather than just ripping me a new one! It's so nice to see nowadays!

  35. Guest says:

    That's kinda bad ass looking………………………………………………………………..

  36. flatfive says:

    If anybody finds out about suspension setup on these things (or any easy ways to slam a Dodge van like this), please let the cat out of the bag. I will do this, guaranteed.

  37. […] As the freaks over at Hooniverse have pointed out, plenty! Deartháir has done the hard work of distilling the good stuff out of a bunch of a very lengthy VW Vortex thread, so we can all enjoy the magic of Dajiban. Now if only Honda and Toyota would hire some of these dudes to restyle their current lineup… [VW Vortex, via Hooniverse] […]

  38. […] As the freaks over at Hooniverse have pointed out, plenty! Deartháir has done the hard work of distilling the good stuff out of a bunch of a very lengthy VW Vortex thread, so we can all enjoy the magic of Dajiban. Now if only Honda and Toyota would hire some of these dudes to restyle their current lineup… [VW Vortex, via Hooniverse] […]

  39. USA-VAN-R says:

    well they say.. there is an ass for every seat… just gotta find a big enough ass
    there is a special interest for everyone whether it be collecting stamps , racing "vehicles" or customizing them
    vans are COOL… and thats all i got to say bout that
    Van oN !

  40. Guest says:

    Showed these pics to my old man, and he got to thinking…..

    If you could get your hands on a dry sump engine, that would allow for the engine to be lowered and set back some, then if you can move the suspension systems forward a little on both ends with the mods they've already done would make it handle pretty damn good.

    The whole time he's saying the above, I'm thinking of the '87 G-Van we just scrapped, setting in the weeds with a ZR1 engine under the dog house…………………………

  41. Deartháir says:

    Congratulations! You're the first person I've had to delete a post from for being an asshat. If you'd like to comment here in the future, tone down the 12-year-old name-calling. I won't block you, as I'm a firm believer in second chances, but that's not the sort of discourse that we allow on Hooniverse. Be civil, even when you disagree.

  42. joshuman says:

    If you don't like it, go elsewhere. The name calling isn't something we do here.

  43. Deartháir says:

    Thanks to whoever reported this asshat, his IP address is logged, and further attempts to comment from near him geographically will be watched. I'm working on calling in a nuclear strike.

  44. […] VWVortex, Hooniverse En Diariomotor: Supasse V, un Lotus japonés | Supasse V, un Lotus japonés | […]

  45. Smith says:

    It's look amazing big van. I like this chevy van after seen this i also decide to buy one van.
    http://www.vans-minivansforsale.com/vans-minivans… here i found one van for me

  46. alex3 says:

    Thanks for bringing it to us.

  47. Sumit Gosh (globussoft.com) BIG SCAM / CHEATER Please be aware of him and make sure you dont pay him before you get what you want his details are mentioned below His GAF id: pgcoding Yahoo: pgcoding skype: indianbill007 His company websites: http://www.globussoft.com http://www.sumitghosh.co.inhttp://www.botguruz.com/

  48. […] Originally Posted by GRtak Wht are American vans in here? Daijiban. ____________________________The Smoking Tire | Hooniverse | steering wheel faces | Mameshiba! […]

  49. Stelios says:

    I feel I need to post this.

    [youtube _ZnljTd6Qlg http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_ZnljTd6Qlg youtube]

  50. Brandon says:

    Just graduated high school. So many of the kids make fun of these vans but they are cheap easy to work with and practical. Plus its always a hoot to see the looks on their face when my buddy blows their doors off with his 1998 Chevy 2500 work van

  51. david says:

    Please let me know where you got the wheels for any of the slammed vans featured in this article.
    David

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